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Could you forgive a friend if they stole from you?

  1. R9139 profile image66
    R9139posted 6 years ago

    Could you forgive a friend if they stole from you?

  2. tlmcgaa70 profile image79
    tlmcgaa70posted 6 years ago

    i have had things stolen from me by those i trusted and called friend. while i have learned not to trust them again, i have forgiven them. forgiveness is not for the one who did you wrong so much as it is for the one who does the forgiving. holding a grudge allows negative emotions to fester and and grow like a cancer. forgiveness brings peace to the forgiver.

  3. xethonxq profile image64
    xethonxqposted 6 years ago

    Forgive? yes, (although I would find out why they felt the need to steal it rather than just ask me)....trust them again? nope.

  4. fpherj48 profile image77
    fpherj48posted 6 years ago

    I am happy to report that I simply can't answer this question.  Although there are numerous people I know and do not trust, I do not consider them "friends."  I have MANY good, long-term friends in my circle (some are "family, who are also friends) and I know them well and we love and respect one another.  It pays to be selective and cautious when becoming "friends" with someone.  Not a soul that I call, "Friend," would ever steal from me...or from anyone, for that matter.  Were that ever to have occured in my life, that person would immediately be UN-friended and put out with the trash.  There'd be no need to waste forgiveness.....I'd not ever even acknowledge their existence any longer.  No need to forgive someone who is not there!

  5. Lastheart profile image65
    Lastheartposted 6 years ago

    Yes, it has happened to me and I have forgiven them; but I learned a lesson of trusting people. A friend is accepted just how they are, even if they are thieves. Many people do things for a circumstance if we are really friends a good chat and finding help is better than not forgiving. Love is unconditional; between friends love exists.

  6. helmutbiscut profile image75
    helmutbiscutposted 6 years ago

    I agree that I could forgive a friend who stole from me, but it would take a while for them to rebuild trust.  I couldn't imagine throwing a friendship away over this, but would want to know why they felt the need to steal rather than ask.  They might be in trouble and need some help.

  7. Healthy Pursuits profile image91
    Healthy Pursuitsposted 6 years ago

    I would forgive the friend and let it go, for my sake rather than the friend's sake.

    However, forgiveness would have nothing to do with whether or not I chose to continue in the friendship.

    At the very least, trust would be lost. If I chose to continue with the friendship, I would show great caution until that friend showed that trust was warranted again.

    Assuming that this was a close friend - whether or not I had anything more to do with my friend, or what future relationship I chose to have with my friend would depend on the circumstances around the theft and the history of the friendship.  For example, if a friend was a lifelong dear friend who was temporarily desperate for money, and stole money from me, I'd let it pass, but expect the money to be repaid as soon as the friend was financially able to. However, if the same friend stole enough money that the friend knew it would cause me harm, or stole something that he or she knew had great sentimental value to me, I'd feel that the friend was less devoted to the friendship than I had thought, and I'd put some distance between me and that person.

    If the friend stole from me to supply a drug habit or for some other reason that my friend would know I would not condone in any way, I would tell that friend to leave me alone until the reason for the theft was no longer a part of my friend's life.

    If the friend stole something from me purely because he or she wanted it, I'd also let the friendship go, because it would not be a real friendship if that happened.

    If this was a casual friendship, the friend's circumstances would have to be truly desperate and the friend would have to know that what was stolen from me would not cause me damage before I would even consider having anything to do with that friend again.

  8. proactrdv profile image72
    proactrdvposted 6 years ago

    You know that is an interesting question which leads to another question, If you don't trust somone after they have done something wrong to you how can you possible forgive them? Based on that I would say no.

  9. Hyphenbird profile image91
    Hyphenbirdposted 6 years ago

    I would forgive them and not harbor offense. I would most likely never trust them again. But again, it depends on why they stole. Sometimes people feel desperate and would never do it again. In any case, forgiveness is the way to go.

  10. onegoodwoman profile image77
    onegoodwomanposted 6 years ago

    I might could forgive the act................but in turn, they would cease to be my friend.

    My friends, do not come to me lightly.........neither does betrayal.

  11. smzclark profile image60
    smzclarkposted 6 years ago

    If they admitted it and apologised and didn't repeat the mistake, then I could.

  12. GoodLady profile image92
    GoodLadyposted 6 years ago

    Perhaps, in time.
    I did forgive a friend who stole from me but it was a very long time ago and we were younger.  Plus, she had two small children.
    Not sure I could forgive someone who stole from me now, now that we are older and wiser.  I think that would be almost impossible. 
    But not impossible.

  13. R9139 profile image66
    R9139posted 6 years ago

    Thank you for all the replies to this question, my personal experience in this matter, during the festive period which has just passed lead me to ask this question. I personally chose to forgive them and let them keep what they took, I plan to write an article on this subject as I feel it is a difficult question for many to answer.

  14. duffsmom profile image59
    duffsmomposted 6 years ago

    It would depend on a number of things like what it was they stole, did they come to me and confess or did I find out by accident.  Was the friend in need etc.  If it was a callous act of greed or something, I would find a new friends.

  15. THEHuG5 profile image60
    THEHuG5posted 6 years ago

    I would probably be able to forgive them once but if they did it again I wouldn't friends with them anymore. I guess it all depends on what they stole too. I can forgive just about anything but stealing my writing. That is pretty much unforgivable in my mind. Either way if I found out that somebody stole from me it would take a long time for them to win back a part of my trust because they would never have my FULL trust ever again.

  16. loveorlost profile image38
    loveorlostposted 6 years ago

    Depends! If the matter is simple than i may fogive . But there are other views: If anyone start stealing from someone and get forgiveness than he/she might try again for bigger one.
    I will give warning first time but never firgive second time.

  17. shampa sadhya profile image83
    shampa sadhyaposted 6 years ago

    I need to know the reason behind their act. It depends upon the genuineness of their cause . At first they will definitely loose my trust but gradually I will forgive because mistake can be rectified with time.Well, if it continues then sorry, I won't be able to forgive.

  18. mathira profile image84
    mathiraposted 6 years ago

    I might outwardly not react with anger, but in my inner mind I would thrust aside such a friend.

  19. profile image0
    St.Cyprianposted 6 years ago

    No.  In my experience thieves will commit other types of crimes, including violent crimes.

  20. Admiral_Joraxx profile image81
    Admiral_Joraxxposted 6 years ago

    Yeah, If he/she sincerely asks for forgiveness and commit not to do it again. It's great to forgive people. forgiveness may take time but it sets the other person free as you also set yourself free from the past. smile

  21. NiaLee profile image61
    NiaLeeposted 6 years ago

    I did forgive a friend who stole money from my stroller when I was jobless with a child and she was going to party. She actually did it as a payback for me not accepting to drop my family and go around partying with her. I did forgive her and pretend it didn't happen. I didn't tell anybody.
    But I never saw her again, especially understanding that the theft was more about revenge and hatred than a need.
    I do stick to principle and prefer to choose people who don't break the 10 commandments to be around me and my family... being honest, truthful and having good intention are a good basis for healthy relationships.

  22. Zainnisar profile image40
    Zainnisarposted 6 years ago

    I had trusted and a few didn't care to value that trust, their is no point of not forgiving them rather what you do with them next, would you trust them again? Well, No.

  23. lburmaster profile image82
    lburmasterposted 6 years ago

    Not really, no. I have this issue as an ex-roommate stole my spoon and shot glass collection along with some of my clothes and a few DVDs. The shot glass and spoon collection are what I miss the most. Most of the pieces are from different countries I have been to. France, England, Romania, Hungary, Turkey, Germany, Mexico, South America and a variety of states in the U.S. I can live without the clothes and DVDs, but the collection pieces are trophies to me of where I have been and what I have done in life. I have often dreamed of finding her, of hunting her down, breaking into her house, and getting my stuff back. Especially the glasses from Oxford. They were one of a kind and cannot be purchased again.... But I restrain myself from finding her because it would not help as I cannot imagine what my actions would be in finding them broken or sold.

  24. georgetyler profile image61
    georgetylerposted 6 years ago

    depends on what they stole, people have stolen from me before but I have always got it back because I always have evidence (due to my paranoia I keep track of all items and record and film my house) I would forgive a friend aslong as they give it back or repay somehow.

  25. tamarawilhite profile image91
    tamarawilhiteposted 23 months ago

    That person clearly is not your friend, when they abuse the trust that way.