a lot of women are insecure and try to blame the lack of sexual aggression on some kind of sexual deficiency like homosexuality. rather than seeing the man for what he really is, and looking at herself for what she really is. Denial. the prospect that someone might not want to have sex with her. how devastating to her self-esteem.
The understanding I'm seeking is not at all about me, for I am a gentleman, and a happily married man. I have had guys pose this question to me. Guys who were living Christian lives, and did not want to have sex outside of marriage, yet, they wanted to be in a relationship.
sorry godpreacher wish I knew the answer for ya but I don't know. Women are mysterious and weird creatures...shoot I am one and I don't fully understand how other women think or why they act a certain way.
It is a result of cultural change. Most women and men no longer follow the traditional courting practices of previous generations. In previous generations most women were expected to attract a good man who could take care of them while they tend to the children and the house. Men only perused 1 lifelong relationship that held meaning. In order to impress a lady and show that you were worthy of her hand in marriage you had to be a gentleman. Today most relationships are not perused with marriage in mind. Most women are no longer looking for and do not expect long term commitment. They no longer have to depend on men for comfort so they pick and choose according to their own desires. There are still some women who value a gentleman but they are few and far between.
There's also the case that many, many women rarely experience such a thing. Most dates are spent trying to avoid the hands, from my experience it didn't matter who or what the guy was normally. So yeah, if a guy isn't trying, you figure he doesn't like you or is gay. At least then you can enjoy his company and the date.
Not all women think this way!! We live in a fast paced society, where "what I want" is the most important thing. This doesn't seem to leave time for "getting to know" someone over a long period of time in a ladylike or gentlemanly fashion.
There are some ladies out there that want to take things slowly and that are looking for committment not a fast fling. You should counsel the men who are asking you this question to be patient and not to compromise their ideals because when they meet the right one the waiting will be worth it:)