What will you do if you discover that your perfect & loving spouse has been cheating on you.
You have been happily married for more than 10 years. You have a family and a great relationship. Your spouse is loving, caring and a good parent too. What will you do if you now accidentally discover that your perfect spouse has been cheating on you for the last 10 years.
Laugh. There is no point in being attached to anything that is going to disappear anyway.
Are you asking this question regarding your own experience? Have you been cheated after ten years of marriage life and now need the advice? Or it's all about your curiosity? As for me, I think when it comes to cheating, do not try to analyze behavior of the cheatter, try to have a more profound look inside yourself.
Sundeep.....Sounds like an ugly problem to me. First things first: I don't usually discover anything "accidentally," because I am a breathing, walking Radar Receiver. All my information is hard work.
I see someone has been happily married, but it certainly isn't the cheating spouse, now is it? Maybe he/she is not at all loving & caring, but the next Oscar-winning actor....ya think? Cheating that's gone on for the majority of the marriage?? Well now, the non-cheating spouse has been a bit comatose I take it?
OK.....I don't happen to have a spouse, but if I did and it was this BUSY little camper.....I would take so many things into consideration before making any sort of decision. Most of all, the wise words of my father would echo in my head: He would say, "I don't understand all these Crimes of Passion....all the jealous rages....men & women killing one another due to infidelity. WHY on earth would you KILL someone, when you have the golden opportunity to simply make them wish they were dead, everyday 24/7, for the rest of their life?"
Well.....my Dad had a point!!
I wouldn't consider lying, cheating, and betraying me as traits of perfection or loving. I most likely would get my ducks in a row and quietly plan my exit.
Hopefully all my tests for STDs are negative! I would hate the thought that someone made a fool out of me or pulled the wool over my eyes for a decade. In fact I would start to wonder if I (really knew) them at all. I couldn't remain with someone untrustworthy.
"Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."
- Oscar Wilde
If someone is cheating on you they don't think you're all that "special".
I would divorce him. And also lay a massive guilt trip on him throughout the divorce process until he could barely lift his head from the weight of his shame. Just because, like, I'm really good at guilt tripping people.
I'm thinking in terms of my current spouse, of course, who fits your description of perfect spouse, happy marriage, etc. and who I cannot imagine even contemplating cheating on me. I have been cheated on in a former relationship, but that was a terrible relationship to begin with, so I didn't care enough to guilt trip him. I just left him. Regardless of the situation, I don't feel that cheating is forgivable (in the sense that one could continue on in the relationship). I think it completely ruins the relationship, because you will never be able to trust that person again, and a relationship is nothing without trust.
Nobody is perfect! If I found out he was having an affair i would leave him. There is no reason to stay with a cheater.
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