Can you date someone who has different political or religious views than your own?
It happens all of the time!
The key is to accept people for who they are.
Most people one goes out on dates with do not become "exclusive relationships" and most exclusive relationships do not become marriages. Dating can be just a casual (fun) social activity!
Naturally everyone is entitled to have their own "must have" list!
Some women will not date guys who are shorter than them. Some guys will not date women who are overweight. Some people won't date anyone who has children in the home, a different race, a smoker/drinker, and yes there are those looking to date only those who have the same political and religious views.
You get to create your own "list"!
For me personally if I found the other person attractive, they were personable, had a similar sense of humor, enjoyed many of the same activities I did and we had a great time whenever we were together is far more important to me than who they vote for or pray to. Problems arise when one seeks to "change" the other person.
There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them as (is) or move on.
The (choice) is up to us!
Firstly, I am male. When dating younger (Late teens to about 40) religion was never an issue. Politics never really came up. There was only two I was in that I can think of? when there was a presidential election. That is when political issues and politics (Activity) seem to be more live than dead. None of them nor myself held close to the ideology of discounting politics itself it just was that school, office, & friend circles politics were more important.
Regarding religion I was then aligned with an evangelical perspective since changed. Even though none of those dating (All were somewhat long term) relationships led to marriage religion was not a factor for the parting. Parting mainly was due to school / career / life paths like moving away. There was not an interest in a long distance relationship. Perhaps having the internet would have made a difference with that? Interesting for me I dated a Catholic, one of Judaism, a devout atheist, one who did not care one way or the other, and two evangelicals.
When in relationship I attended their place of worship of their faith alignment mainly. I learned and perhaps learned something of synthesis too. Maybe there were not issues because we did not get into the politics of religion, even though there were discussions . In other words there was not antagonism only curiosity and learning.
That probably attributes to my abilities with tolerances between differences religious or political. I am sure it contributed to now having a general open mindset too. I think and feel they had an emphatic impact with my belief(s) of Love too. So, overall I can say the experiences were positive while perhaps today I can truly say they were enlightening.
Footnote: My passion for high performance cars, hot rodding, and NHRA drag racing may have been the 'big' issue. And, with perspectives that could be seen as religious and political. I am an avid ProStock fan over being a Top AA Fuel Funny Car or Dragster fan. ;-) Some were avid Funny Car fans with their view they were much more exciting to watch . . . and the heroes were more flamboyant to them. Plus, Shirley Muldowney was a world champion with a dragster. ;-)
Yes you can, as long as the two of you have other "contact points". However, if by "dating" you mean something that may turn permanent, I would be careful. Relationships go through phases of adjustment, and when they are at a "low", you may start using those individual differences as a proof of your not being compatible to each other.
But then again, no sense to generalize here, it all depends on how flexible both of you are.
I am an atheist married to a Buddhist. We are very good at making allowances for each other's point of view, and I have no difficulty going to the Buddhist temple with her once in a while. As the whole ceremony is conducted in a language that I don't understand, it can be a challenge, but it is fascinating to watch. I read the Buddha's works (in translation) occasionally as philosophy. Take the dogma away, it is quite interesting.
I could never though have seen myself dating a fundamentalist Christian or Muslim - both would have run counter to my tolerance and open-mindedness.
And as for politics - I don't think that most conservatives could have stood two hours in my company frankly. My open-minded tolerance and my belief that enough is as good as a feast they would never accept (what would I do with billions - except support worthwhile causes?).
Not that I have lacked ambition, but a job has to be interesting first and foremost, after that the financial rewards come into play. Doing my job successfully was always the important thing. All else was secondary.
You shouldn't date someone who disagrees with you on those matters if they are very important to you. If those views are not central to your life and how you live it, sure.
for some people this is impossible, but most likely it can still work. its just a small little problem that don't need to get bigger so keep it small.
by paradigmsearch 6 years ago
I just thought you would want to know...
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