Do you believe in SMART dating & mating i.e. taking into consideration a person's educational,
emotional, intellectual, mental, psychological, & socioeconomic background before even thinking of entering into any type of relationship w/him or her? Do you believe that many people don't date/mate smart? Why? Why not?
I could not be with someone who doesn't stimulate my brain. I am naturally attracted to men who can converse on most topics intelligently, read widely, value education, and have a creative side. The only thing more important to my list of needs in a partner is that he needs to have a kind heart. I have found all this and more in my hubby of 18 year come April. Don't settle for less, ladies. There are great men out there.
Unfortunately for most of us when it comes to love and relationships we tend to (fail our way) to success. If this were not true I suppose we'd all be married to our high school or college sweethearts!
The reality is most of us initially start pursuing relationships before we have figured out who (we) are! Let alone what we want and need in a mate. There's an evolutionary process that takes place as we mature.
Oftentimes the first boyfriend/girlfriend is during Jr. high or high school. Naturally at that age the "must have list" is fairly basic (cute/hot, cool, and a great sense of humor) is pretty much the requirements for being an ideal mate. The primary focus in our youth is (NOW) not the (future). Who is going to the home coming dance, the basketball/football game, or the prom. Many of us con ourselves into thinking our teenage relationships are "adult relationships" and some even believe they have found their "soul-mate" at age 17!
However with age comes wisdom; or at least we hope so!
Our "must have traits list" should evolve over time. Hopefully at age 28 one is not using the same must have list they had at age 16.
Essentially dating smart means you have figured out who you are and what you want from a mate! No longer are you allowing "coincidence" and "happenstance" to dictate your relationship choices.
That's the equivalent of going shopping without a list!
Odds are you're likely to throw anything in your cart at the last minute. Maturity and self-discipline are required to stick to (your) list.
Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself.
The goal is to find someone who shares your same values, wants the same things for the relationship, naturally agrees with you on how to obtain those things, and last but not least there is a mutual depth of love and desire for one another.
Like attracts like and opposites attract divorce attorneys!
Anyone who is having one bad dating/relationship after another probably needs to re-examine their (mate selection criteria).
The only thing all of your bad relationships have in common is (you).
You are responsible for your own happiness.
I think smart dating is a great idea. Then you don't mess around with those who haven't worked as hard as you have in life!
by rick023 7 years ago
I have always been the type of guy that just goes with the flow of things and believes that things in life should just evolve naturally. For example, I struggle with formal aspects of relationships and just prefer to let things happen as they do and feel that if things are good they will...
by dashingscorpio 4 years ago
When dating do you believe there is real difference between being shallow and having preferences?If a man refuses to date women who are overweight and a woman refuses to date men who are shorter than her would you consider them to be shallow? or Would you view it as having specific preferences?...
by catalystsnstars 6 years ago
For men, do you think all women are the same? For women, do you think all men are the same?Recently and in the past, I've experienced and seen too many infidelities on the man's part, from close family members and potential in laws. It's forcing me to question if there really is a great divide...
by Leaderofmany 8 months ago
At what age should people stop dating or should they continue to date until the final roll call?
by Charlu 5 years ago
Why are people so baffled that some like being alone and not dating, or being in a relationship?Why are so many concerned with the fact that some people choose to stay single and not date or be in a relationship? Maybe they haven't found the right one, are working on themselves, or maybe they...
by peter565 2 years ago
Do you believe teen love is a waste of time?I was once a teenager myself and I have to conclude teen love is a waste of time. I believe a teenager should not be wasting his time on relationship. I had more then one girl that like me during my senior year, I just told her off, because I believe it...
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