My boyfriend still looks and comments on other girls facebook picture

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   affairdetectorposted 13 years ago

   so i recently got a new boyfriend, who has apparently liked me for quite some time, and he goes through pictures of other girls on facebook. he'll make comments like "wow nice hair" or if someone says "you look like a pornstar" he'll say that he agrees. Is this an early sign of cheating and that hes going to get bored later on?

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      Jluviesposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I think that it shows immaturity and a need to be a part of that networking scene in order to be contempt.  Myspace and Facebook have been the cause of many broken relationships.  Because it starts out so innocent, it is often continued and then before you know it, an affair has started.   
      
      They leave comments as an "innocent" gesture, but I'm sure would not decline the girl if she began to message him secretly or attempt to meet up.  Either he is looking for the next best thing while holding on to what he has or he is an attention hoar and needs to  comment in order to get feedback or have his posts be noticed.  Either way, he needs to grow up.  How would he like if you left comments like that?

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         Myster_eswifeposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I agree with you on this topic, a real man wouldn't feel the need to make any other female feel on top of the world, he should be saying these comments to you.

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      Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      talk to him. saying someone looks like a pornstar may be just stating a fact. It does not have to be a sign....it could just be conversation. Ony way you can know is if you talk to him.
      
      Men like to look.

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      Ben Evansposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Myspace, Facebook, Friendster, etal are all hookup sites.   I have heard a lot of people say oh no they are just ways of keeping in touch.  I personally dont have an account in any of the aforementioned sites.
      
      I think the behavior is inappropriate for someone in a relationship.  I would talk to him about it.  If your relationship is serious, you should delete your account as well as request that your boyfriend do the same.
      
      While making comments on Facebook is not yet cheating it can lead to cheating.  I do not think that any of the aforementioned sites are apropriate for people who are in serious relationships.  Many people may disagree but I have seen many relationships destroyed with these sites.  They are basically sites to flirt on line.

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      kelkel7posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, especially if he doesnt hear you complain about it. Unless he is an idiot he knows this bothers you even though you havent verbally told him it does. People only do things they can get away with. Set some guidelines for yourself. Some girls are cool with their guys going to strip clubs for example. There is nothing wrong with that as long as both people are on the same page. Just like there are some people who are ok with there partner looking at people on facebook. You are clearly not cool with it. You need to tell to stop and if he doesnt move on. There is nothing wrong with you not feeling comfortable about what he is doing. You can say something like, "Look "Matt" I know you it doesnt bother some people, but I cant deal with the whole girls on facebook thing. Your not a pervert or a bad person, it is just something I cant deal with." If he gives it up thats cool, but if he doesnt you will have no problem finding a guy who doesnt have to have numerous pictures and contacts of  facebook hotties to feed his ego; because you will be enough to feed it. Life is short. Follow and listen to your gut. P.S: I can tell your younger than me (im 25) I know he seems like the most important thing in the world right now but you will laugh when you think about him a year from now. I promise.

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         Jluviesposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Great Advice!!!

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      485naruto485posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      the 4rth grader.........................
      
      
      i personely agree wit ben
      
      i dont have a acount on those either but there ARE hook up sites see idk about this but twiter mite not have pictures so you could go the twitter then he wont be able to make comments wich could lead to cheating i say try to snoop around and c wat you can do to stop that i mean realy i have a gf we do face book and we dont do that so he must be a little pumpkin eater cheeter becase if you know hes doing that he must be doing it infront of you how lame is that. and i think kelks right u will laugh a year from now just think about how ST ahh dont want to say that.............. under minded he must be to do it infront of you do u realy think your going to miss that its like wat yoda saidin the new 1 "power leads to jelosy jelosy leads to fear of los fear of los leads to greed". now knowing that to me its to things.....
      him trying to be hard to completely catch or ya hes got to be cheeting... but dont worry im cherokee if you want me to punchum in da face i will mi fists are growing soft any way im having to punch  walls to keep my fists sturn and strong!

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      Pearldiverposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I'm not surprised your boyfriend is shopping around... clearly he is looking for someone with a higher scoring personality.
      
      As a self promoted expert of such things...
      Why are you asking us to comment?
      
      Perhaps... With an author score of only 1... maybe you will find it easier to merely copy and paste a new boyfriend.. instead of critizing your current boyfriend's obvious wisdom

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      Healthy Living Isposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Dump him

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      dashingscorpioposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Your focus is on the wrong person! This is not about him. It's about you!
      
      There are over 7 billion people on this planet. Out of all the guys (you) could have (chosen) to be your boyfriend (you) chose this guy! Before you decide to become a "couple" with someone you should have your "shopping list" of traits you want in a mate.
      
      Figure out why that is, and why you're still with him (if) you don't like what he does. You are responsible for your own happiness.
      
      Note: Very few guys are running around with their hand up in the air screaming; "I'm looking for woman to (change) me!"
      
      There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: we either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. You're always where (you) choose to be.
      
      People only change when (they) want to change. You're better off investing your time trying to find someone who already is the kind of person you want to be with. If you can't accept this move on.
      
      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary." - Oscar Wilde
      
      Clearly if he thought (you) were "special" then at the very least he'd do a better job with hiding his flirtations and sexual innuendo with other girls! LOL!

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   ralwusposted 13 years ago

   yes. it's a man thing, not a love thing. he will always look at the menu, diet or not.

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      affairdetectorposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      so you mean, that's an early sign of cheating?

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         Wendi Mposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I don't think it's necessarily an early sign of cheating.
         
         I was married to 2 entirely different types of men (personality wise) and they both acted in the manner you describe.  One of them turned out to be a cheater, but the other couldn't have been more faithful.
         
         Talk to this man if it bothers you.  His reaction might give you a little more insight.

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         485naruto485posted 13 years agoin reply to this

         4rth grader i agree wit windi maybe maybe not if u can post a picture of him i promise i can tell with all i said + i have my own girl friend like maker of this if i read right.

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   Smiley_Snehaposted 13 years ago

   Why not talk to him about it?

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   Falsor Wingposted 13 years ago

   That's biological, all he can do differently is lie about it. Look at it this way, even if you are Monica Belluci, Angelina Jolie is still an attractive woman.

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      psycheskinnerposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Funny, I thought men had conscious control of what they typed.

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   ralwusposted 13 years ago

   Yes. We are all cheaters in one way or another.

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   Marie Doyleposted 13 years ago

   If he's doing it in front of you it could be a sign that he's not very smart.

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   blondepoetposted 13 years ago

   It's a man's natural instinct to look. It does not mean he will cheat.At least he is doing it in front of you not behind your back.
   As long as he is showing a natural appreciation in front of you and not looking with his tongue hanging to the ground it seems pretty harmless to me.

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      psycheskinnerposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Looks, yes.  Engage in conversations using the word "porn star".  No.

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   alexandriaruthkposted 13 years ago

   hi, this is interesting, are you hurt by it, tell him about your feelings because if he knows that you are hurt by his acts, then he will not do it in front of you -- would you like that?
   I think men are just always looking at nice images hehe!

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   ryankettposted 13 years ago

   So the 'Affair Detector' with 29 hubs about, well... 'Affair Detecting', is asking advice on a forum about how to 'detect' signs of an 'affair'. That either smacks of irony, or makes this thread a big load of spammy poop.

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      Justine76posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      spammy poop!!!!!!! 
      I hate it when that happens....

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         SomewayOuttaHereposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         LOL!  too funny....

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      mega1posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      oooooh!  what's that smell?

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    redemption86posted 13 years ago

    I actually read in a news paper this morning that divorce solicitor's have said that facebook is cited as reasons for divorce in 2 out of five divorces! anyway to be honest i think that its a load of rubbish. A relationship is built on trust, do you trust your man? I know i trust mine and we both comment on how nice people look and nice hair ect. If I where you I would not read too much into it, enjoy your relationship and if it all goes wrong in the end(which I hope it doesnt) then cope with that situation when it arrises. Until then its unlikley your relationship will last if your already thinking this might be a sign of cheating, it isnt.

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    (Q)posted 13 years ago

    Men AND women will check each other out, talk about it and then move on to their respective lives, cheaters or not. If you're worried about this, you might be the one with the problem, too insecure with relationships, perhaps.

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    MalibuWriterposted 13 years ago

    My boyfriend deleted his facebook once we had been together for a little while. Confront him about it and say you aren't comfortable with him commenting on other girls' pictures in that way. If he won't change that habit or gets mad at you, then he is simply immature.

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       Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Really? I find your restrictions too much.

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          kimberlyslyricsposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          I find your restrictions three much :

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             Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             

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                kimberlyslyricsposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                

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                   Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                   

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       (Q)posted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Isn't that rather immature?

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    nasus loopsposted 13 years ago

    I agree with most.  I think you should talk to him, after all making comments as to how someone looks is not a sign of cheating.  Most people do this, male or female.  If he gets touchy about it then very immature attitude and probably not worth your time.

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    divacratusposted 13 years ago

    Definitely talk to him! I don't find anything bad in this -- considering he's doing it in front of you! If I see someone who's having nice hair or a nice physique, I would tell him that. That doesn't mean I am cheating on my boyfriend!

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    liljen23posted 13 years ago

    If you think he is straying away from you, make him want you more and let him know how you feel about what he is doing. I wrote 2 hubs on relationships and it may help..
    
    http://hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Keep-You … ship-Solid
    http://hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Make-My- … nt-Me-More

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    optimus grimlockposted 13 years ago

    maybe you have trust issues!

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    Muktuposted 13 years ago

    You teach people how to treat you. So if its unacceptable to you then let him know. If he doesn't seem to care then that will indicate where he stands with regards to your relationship.

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    Mekenzieposted 13 years ago

    Muktu, couldn't have said it better!  I AGREE

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    starqueen13posted 13 years ago

    wow i cant wait to see where this goes

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    Scarlett Hartposted 13 years ago

    Men are visual, so that would make sense.  At least some men are open about 'looking' and 'comment' openly.  Looking, which ALL men do, is natural.  It's when the partner (who is doing the looking) does not give their partner/spouse ANY attention there could be a problem.  Great topic!

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    Sed-meposted 9 years ago

    ay yi yi

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