Do we really need online dating to find love?

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  1. profile image54
    matchmateposted 7 years ago

    THE NEED:
    We all come to a point in our lives where we need or want a special someone to share our lives with, but where do we find this person. Where do we look?
    Statistically in this day and age 1 out of every 5 relationships begins online. There is a smorgasbord of singles that are all online for the same purpose. This helps narrow down your search, but the question is what online dating site is best for you? This is where the real hunting begins.
    First you need to narrow down exactly what it is you are looking for: Friendship, casual dating, romance, or a serious long-term relationship. Once you know what it is you seek you can most likely find a social network or dating site that is best-suited for you.

    1. dianne143 profile image38
      dianne143posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Actually no.. but its not bad if you give it a try through online dating there are lot of couples who are happily married now they met at online dating

      1. profile image0
        Sophia Angeliqueposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        But 80% of most singles don't find their mate online! smile

        1. noyon_ku profile image54
          noyon_kuposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          And within 20% there have no real love.

        2. Judy HBerg profile image85
          Judy HBergposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          I know that I needed online dating as I am the "one in five" who began a relationship on line.

          I am happy to report that we will celebrate our 9th wedding anniversary this July. 

          The "online experience" was exactly what I needed to find my mate smile

          1. Joy56 profile image77
            Joy56posted 7 years agoin reply to this

            did you write a hub about it????

        3. Wendy Brady profile image57
          Wendy Bradyposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          While I think that online dating is becoming more popular and it connects people with those that they would not have met otherwise, it can be a scary world!  You never know if you are really talking to, or meeting, the person that you THINK you are!  There are so many horror stories out there about people that were not who they said they were.  This makes me steer clear of the online dating world.  But I can honestly say that I think it would be helpful to meet people around the world that I may enjoy talking to and spending time with!

          1. halifaxdating profile image54
            halifaxdatingposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Deleted

            1. profile image46
              overtheexesposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              Deleted

              1. halifaxdating profile image54
                halifaxdatingposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                Deleted

          2. Mrs. J. B. profile image59
            Mrs. J. B.posted 7 years agoin reply to this

            There are so many ways you can meet someone in person. Online dating ummm hello???? No way.

            1. speedbird profile image75
              speedbirdposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              Yes, I think we need online dating, with the advent of the Internet, online dating has been fun and it reduces the hassle of doing it manually. wink

            2. Cagsil profile image81
              Cagsilposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              No

              1. profile image0
                kimberlyslyricsposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                big_smile

            3. profile image47
              GcNexusposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              Online dating just narrowed down our search for true soul-mate. I think it would be better if someone wish to continue long-term relationship to avoid online dating & try to maintain  socialism by joining  every social ceremony.

              1. calvin95mosley profile image55
                calvin95mosleyposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                Actually no, But if you are in case didn't found your love in  your place or area you can use online dating as the means to find someone out there looking for the same purpose with convenience...

              2. alamnoah profile image51
                alamnoahposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                In fact, no we don’t need online dating to find love. Why? Because love is everywhere, you only need to go out and to get some courage to approach potential lovers.
                However, if you live hundreds of kilometers away from a city or in a very remote village, online dating can be an "option".

              3. Apostle Jack profile image61
                Apostle Jackposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                Nope.It is the lust and the rush to fill the void and empty space in our life.
                Impatience and lack of dependency on God have cause one to seek self satisfaction without God .The deeper you dig the more you have less of a chance,because you put God  last on the agenda.He knows and we don't.

              4. Emmaback profile image60
                Emmabackposted 3 years agoin reply to this

                not always. but sometimes it can be a wayout.

            4. Bronson_Hub profile image60
              Bronson_Hubposted 7 years ago

              I did my fair share of online dating.  The age group I dated was 25-35ish, I went on a lot of dates.  A lot.  I felt a little paniced before turning 30 so I spend February 2010 through June 2010 dating as if I was going to die on my birthday in June.

              I met a mix of people online, offline, and I do notice one thing more so about the online dating than offline.  When meeting someone online the ratio of men to women puts women in an extremely high position to be selective.  The amount of desperate men who would otherwise never approach women in public feel safer at home with the computer screen and relative anonymity to protect themselves from the pain of rejection.  So expect the guys who sit in the corner fantasizing about you in secret to come out and tell you just what they're thinking if you're a woman.  Yes, it's disturbing.  Or a turn on, depending on how you feel about it tongue

              I used paid sites, free sites, all kinds of sites to see what it would be like.  For the most part women online reply with, "omg thank you for being normal!"  Oh if they only knew how much that wasn't the case, but that's another story!  I did meet people, everyone gets more nervous than usual, and even if we tell ourselves there's no expectations, we're on an online dating site.  What do people do on those sites?  Look for friends?  Please.  I've met lots of people who are just looking for friends, who want to do a whole lot more than just be friendly, and call it "friends".  They don't even say "friends with benefits" because that seems dirty to them.  So they just say "friends" and leave it up to us to figure out who they really are as the date goes on.

              What I want to know is, if 1/5 people meet online, what happens to the other 4?  Do they meet anyone or end up single for the rest of their lives?

              1. kallini2010 profile image81
                kallini2010posted 7 years agoin reply to this

                is that the end to your story?  I assume your survived your June birthday, but have you found a woman to date or to be in a relationship with?

                I am really interested in other people's experiences, because mine was skewed into men looking strictly for sex no matter what was said.

                -- I am reading your profile...
                -- ??? and?
                -- It is too long...
                -- But it tells you I am looking for a relationship.
                -- It also says you like muscular bodies.
                -- It does not matter, of course, I prefer muscular bodies, but that comes with a relationship, not on its own, I am not looking for a stud...

                End of session.

                What I found is it is easy to set a date and meet a person, but it is as difficult as hell to meet a suitable person. Not the right one, but the one has a potential to become something more "SummerFun" guy looking for sex.

                1. profile image49
                  samuelzposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  :-).....clearly U have misgivings about online dating. I do get the picture though and put like that even I would be wary of online dating. I recently tried it with disastrous results
                  http://hubpages.com/hub/FLIRTATIOUS-INTENT.
                  But I know of people who have found great and lasting relationships online. with time comes the ability to separate the silly and extremely silly from those who are genuine.

                  1. kallini2010 profile image81
                    kallini2010posted 7 years agoin reply to this

                    I guess so, my experience is not particularly successful.  The only result that I have is a bunch of stories I can tell and make you laugh and no relationship.

                    By the way,  I pressed on the link - the page does not exist.

                    I am not seriously looking, I am only thinking of going back to online dating that is all.

                    Right now all my time is tied up between work, home, dancing & HubPages.

                    But I did not see anything of interest regarding online dating.  I am not interested in generalizations.  I can generalize like a creative genius myself. LOL

                    That is how one of sales associates in Chapters (bookstore) introduced himself to me today.  "I am a creative genius".  No kidding.

                    1. profile image49
                      samuelzposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                      Deleted

                      1. kallini2010 profile image81
                        kallini2010posted 7 years agoin reply to this

                        I read your article.  Did you describe what actually happened or did you write a story for a story sake?

                        I don't understand the expression "she was a shirt" (English is my second language).

                        Assuming it is a real story, I must tell you I don't mind blind dates.  I have enough courage and skills to any meet people for any reason.  High rank officials or people who would look down on you -- anyone -- it does not matter to me.

                        There was one telephone conversation with a guy who had a birthday on that day and that was our first conversation anyways, so he did not want to be alone and invited me to a bar to have a drink.  We did not make it to the bar.  He was too full of himself and at some point I became really sarcastic.

                        -- What is my name?

                        (he asked assuming I did not pay enough attention.  I did.  I remembered his name)

                        It came in the middle of the conversation, I was to remember all the details about "Wonderful Him".

                        -- I don't care.
                        -- How dare you!

                        Yes, I dared, I just did.  It is not about what impression I would make, it is not about being liked by everyone, it is about choosing (selecting) the right person.

                        I had plenty of blind dates, but there is no relationship.  That is why I am wondering WHERE and HOW I can find suitable men, not just any.

                        As far as "creative genius" goes, no, I did not tell him off for a reason, but yes he was too full of himself, giving me answers with the air of finality and the truth in its final instance.

                        I do laugh sometimes (to myself), but mostly it is sad and disappointing.

                        The links to what I write?  You just press on my avatar and it takes it to my page.  You can read anything you want, but "Dating and Online Dating" section is not the best for the moment, because it was only a beginning.  Now I would have written it differently.

                        1. profile image49
                          samuelzposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                          actually did happen way back when I started online dating, haven't had much success with the same though.
                          I agree with you dating in itself is not an opportunity to impress but rather to reveal who we really are, to let others into our private worlds and to hope that who we are and what we stand for they'll respect enough to bear with.
                          I should say though that You should at least try being more tolerant sometimes. I tend to believe that everyone or most people are in fact nervous and sometimes go to great lengths to conceal the fact, case and point that guy you met probably was suffering from an inferiority complex or wasn't confident enough in his own skin.
                          Ill def go through your work and I must say I do enjoy your writing style...case and point -quote and quote:
                          " giving me answers with the air of finality and the truth in its final instance."
                          lovely jus lovely

                          1. kallini2010 profile image81
                            kallini2010posted 7 years agoin reply to this

                            Thank you, Samuelz:

                            That is why I asked you whether it happened or you wrote it for writing's sake.  When I write, I tend to embellish for comic relief as well.

                            It might appear that I am intolerant, but I am quite the opposite.

                            -- Why do you care about men so much?
                            -- What do you mean?
                            -- You should not accept what you accept.
                            -- But they are people just like us.
                            -- Are they?  I doubt it.

                            My friends insist that I should be harsher with men, but  I don't quite see the point.  "The Creative Genius" guy - I could have been annoyed right after that phrase and it was the beginning of our conversation, I could have terminated it at that point, but I did not.  I made a connection.

                            I am fairly tolerant.

                            In that extreme example, the guy was trying to pick somebody up probably for a night out and sex later, but I was not the one to oblige.

                            I hope you will enjoy what I am writing, but for now the plan does not include any "dating stories", I have no time.  But later - definitely.

            5. Sugari profile image56
              Sugariposted 7 years ago
            6. TomC35 profile image55
              TomC35posted 7 years ago

              You do not need it, but it is just another avenue to explore.

            7. wilsontom profile image59
              wilsontomposted 7 years ago

              i dont think so

            8. SomewayOuttaHere profile image59
              SomewayOuttaHereposted 7 years ago

              ...oh for sure...it works for some...i guess...

              http://www.funmunch.com/funny_pictures/cartoon/Online%20Dating.jpg

              1. recommend1 profile image69
                recommend1posted 7 years agoin reply to this

                Now if we can just organise the actual sex act online we would never need to find out what is really on the other end of it big_smile

                1. SomewayOuttaHere profile image59
                  SomewayOuttaHereposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  ...i think it already has been organized....that's what i hear anyway.. and yup..don't know if you'd want to know who is on the other end.....awwwwww........big_smile

                  http://mid4.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/cyber-sex.jpg

            9. xboxps3wow profile image42
              xboxps3wowposted 7 years ago

              no we don't, its just another way to find someone...

            10. Misha profile image70
              Mishaposted 7 years ago

              One can find love only within themselves. Finding a mate is a different story smile

              1. Leann Zarah profile image87
                Leann Zarahposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                I agree with you, Misha. smile

            11. kethyjewel profile image59
              kethyjewelposted 7 years ago

              Online dating is only a platform for its organisor.

            12. Mannequin92 profile image58
              Mannequin92posted 7 years ago

              Online dating works for some and sucks to some people too. However, if a person is really in dire need to find somebody to spend the rest of his or her hectic life with then dating sites are the best option. One does not have to endure the loneliness because of skepticism brought about by other people's online dating failure.

            13. sereneng profile image59
              serenengposted 7 years ago

              I get to know my current husband through dating online. It was one of those chat programs that help us to link up while we are miles apart. So I believe online dating is the future for young people who go online so frequently.

            14. profile image0
              CheetahsLadyposted 7 years ago

              I can see the argument on both sides.  1st being that people love to give false information that prevents you from ever knowing what's real and whats fake.  The 2nd part of that is that with online dating you can take your time to get to know someone and get to know them for the things that actually matter. (where they are at mentally and emotionally)

            15. profile image0
              reeltaulkposted 7 years ago

              Online dating is definitely not needed, but pacify those that like to communicate from a distance.  Or those that are shy, or maybe just like variety.  Once again another "game" for one to play

            16. Leann Zarah profile image87
              Leann Zarahposted 7 years ago

              It depends on one's perspective. Others shun away from online dating, even mock or think lowly of those who do so; while there are also people who've successfully found a mate online. Not a few married couples say that they initially met via a chatroom or an online dating site. It's a case-to-case basis then.

            17. Sarah Connor profile image61
              Sarah Connorposted 7 years ago

              I think that online dating provides a great way supplement to ordinary dating methods.  Online dating has advantages and disadvantages but the time savings of using computers to locate people with common interests is a very big plus. Once you meet your true love the 'how we met' part becomes largely irrelevant! :-)

            18. tsmog profile image82
              tsmogposted 7 years ago

              OK, I may be different, yet that is cool. My experience with online dating in my age group over 50 is "do you have retirement is one of the first questions always asked. It usually goes along with why are you still working. So, online dating does not work for me. I would rather spend the 30+ ducketts = $$$ on a brunch/casual dinner, enjoy ourselves, have good conversation, and let the chips fall.

            19. CharlieNikhole profile image58
              CharlieNikholeposted 7 years ago

              Personally, I never liked dating and I'm not a mingler. Even being as young as I am I have never cared for dating. I did it but I seem to attract weird people that only wanted to go out with me because of my hair or chest. No one ever really tried to get to know me. I met my husband online, he wasn't like any guy I ever met and he sure wasn't a guy I would generally go for. He's a redneck and I'm obviously not but he was more interested in my personality than my hair color or piercings. So for me, online was the best thing I've ever done but there are people out there that don't need it.

            20. rajanrayhan profile image45
              rajanrayhanposted 7 years ago

              Dating? Where does the word come from? Why are we interested to date? Who is the first dater? How can it be evaluated?

            21. camlo profile image88
              camloposted 7 years ago

              I suppose online dating sites are useful for people living in remote areas, or areas where there's little in the way of entertainment, like bars and discoteques, where we usually usually meet people.

            22. rebekahELLE profile image85
              rebekahELLEposted 7 years ago

              I read an article yesterday about the online game community of World of Warcraft becoming a hot spot to find love with over 12 million subscribers.  People bond with other avatars and end up falling in love, meeting and in this article, marriage followed.  http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/24/fashi … =1&hpw

              As far as the dating sites... boring...

            23. flamingoville profile image58
              flamingovilleposted 7 years ago

              Mixed feelings about it, works for some, not everyone, I think its an okay resource, but often hard to weed out game players.

            24. Jonathan Janco profile image66
              Jonathan Jancoposted 7 years ago

              I gave online dating a brief trial. There was so much spam I thought I was in a Monty Python skit. That was the end of that.

            25. ftclick profile image54
              ftclickposted 7 years ago

              online dating can help you find love that you cannot find in your own backyard. You may never cross paths with someone. For some it works , for others it doesn't.

            26. 4tune profile image60
              4tuneposted 7 years ago

              Never had anything good come about online in any romantic way whatsoever, even the once accidental crush.

              I don't think I would ever trust it now too much can be hidden then you waste all of that time to find out they are completely immoral even.

              Nope, It's too easy for them to be able hide their real face from you, You would have to meet many people like after just one or two conversations I think, But they don't wanna do that that.

              To hell with this hiding BS, so many do that, I mean even in the same area they prefer keep you online and in the dark.

             
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