Online Dating has changed the way many people meet new people. But has it made d

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   SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years ago

   Online Dating has changed the way many people meet new people. But has it made dating better?
   
   While online dating has become they way more people meet and connect it also is full of "Vipers" who prey on lonely people. People are being conned out of money and more. And even worse many, many people are getting their hearts broken by people they don't even know and some by people they have never met. You can be anyone you want on the Internet. Have you ever been "Catfished"? The new term for being deceived by someone online you may have developed feelings for.

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   Justsilvieposted 11 years ago

   Love at first byte? I had a 15 year relationship with someone I met online(Not on a dating site). He was not the person I thought he was and I am sure he felt the same way. I learned a lot about this subject from personal experience and feedback from others in the same boat.
   
   Online we often are who we wish to be, not who we really are. Online everything moves too fast, especially the feeling of intimacy. Taking the time to get to know the other person and giving them time to get to know us is probably the best and only way to build a lasting relationship and it needs to be face to face, so we can see each other, experience each other’s moods and personality. See each other at our best and worst. 
   
   Online might be a great way to meet someone, but I would work on getting to know them better in person. So move slowly!

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      SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      So true. It does seem to move too quickly. It feels intimate prematurely. Good advice. Dee

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   mattheosposted 11 years ago

   Honestly....My wife and I met on E-Harmony about four years ago! It definitely has its "cons", such as the risk of meeting an imposter or, worse still, a monster. But it also has its "pros" - such as the ability to be very selective in what you're looking for, and meeting someone who is looking for the same thing.
   
   My wife and I met in May, were engaged in August, and got married in January! We spent her first birthday that I knew her on our honeymoon!
   
   To be sure, you have to be smart about this. Make sure you know who you're talking to before you meet them. Even just talking on the phone first is a huge step! You NEVER want to meet anyone without having real conversations first! If you can...make sure you skype with them too. This way you know that their picture itself isn't a lie.
   
   If you're comfortable after you've talked with them for a while, meet up with them in a PUBLIC PLACE - maybe even with friends. Above all...never fall for someone in secret. Tell your family about them. Tell your friends about them. Introduce them to "your people" over the phone or on skype. It's important to listen to outside perspectives on your "relationship."
   
   If you're smart and know who you're talking to - meeting someone online can be a great thing!

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      SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Wonderful to hear a positive story. I have an online friend I've been in touch with for 4 yrs. He's my new age pen pal. We've skyped, talked an keep each other updated on kids & family. Congrats & Good Luck! Dee

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   Annie Millerposted 11 years ago

   I met my husband on Prodigy (remember them? Kind of like AOL, if you don't). At the time it was more a bulletin board format rather than live chat and he and I posted to many of the same boards.
   
   I felt a connection pretty quickly. We are only a few years apart in age and so had a lot in common regarding the things we had lived through, but from very dissimilar backgrounds. We did get to know each other pretty well just writing and commenting on posts.
   
   One day I wrote about something that had been very traumatic and life changing. Jim sent me an email to tell me he had experienced the same thing. We began emailing then taking on the phone - thankfully, we were honest with each other and agreed he should visit.
   
   He arrived on march 16, 1996. We were married March 16, 1997. I can't say it's all been hearts and flowers ... it's been an adventure, to say the least. Saturday we will celebrate our 16th wedding anniversary.

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      SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Wow now that's a heart warming story. Nothing worth having is easy or perfect my Gma used to say. God Bless you both. Dee

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   kabugalewisposted 11 years ago

   no it hasnt. All it has done is make the.process more tideous.

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   stricktlydatingposted 11 years ago

   I think online dating just gives singles a new avenue of meeting people. If you use a local dating website you have the chance to meet other singles near you, and you don't have to pay a lot for site fee's.  Of course if you're corresponding with others from overseas, and they start to ask for your money it should ALWAYS ring alarm bells!

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      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I agree it's just another option for single people to meet others! The more options one has to meet others the better their odds improve of finding someone compatible. Online dating doesn't replace other ways of meeting. It's another item on the menu

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   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   There were liars, cheaters, and conmen long before online dating arrived. There was a time when people fell in love with "pen pals". For those too young to remember what a "pen pal" was it a case of people sending letters via snail mail  to people they've never met in person. Oftentimes a "pen pal" was a long distance arrangement.
   Online dating is just another (tool) for meeting new people. Much like a fork it can be used to eat a garden salad or a slice of double fudge chocolate cake. However I have never heard of an overweight person blame their weight gain on a (fork)! And yet people blame their bad dating experiences on the Internet/online dating. We make (our own) choices.  Everyone (chooses) their own friends, lovers, and spouse.
   The same people that are online go to the grocery store, movie theatre, beach, park, nightclubs, shopping malls, and church. It's not where you meet but whom you meet that counts! People just need to research and be selective about which sites to join. Free sites or low cost sites are likely to attract the shadiest people. It also pays to use good "commonsense" with dealing with any stranger regardless of how you met. Avoid the most common mistakes. http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … ine-Dating

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      SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      The difference on the Internet is you add pictures, FB profiles that appear to be real, phone calls are less expensive to make & more that can make a person appear to be more desirable & authentic. Thanks for your input. Dee

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      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      No matter how you come into contact with a stranger whether it's in person, online, over the phone, it takes time to get to know  a person. Most people put their best foot forward to attract others. It takes awhile to see their "authentic self".

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   JChristianposted 11 years ago

   I think online dating is just another tool in the arsenal. It certainly can make it easier to meet more people from the comfort of your home, especially if you're in a remote or rural area.
   I agree that you can "reinvent" yourself online - that doesn't have to be a bad thing.
   It can be a second chance as well as an opportunity (unfortunately) to take advantage of someone.
   Those things happen offline just as easily, I believe.
   I did date online for maybe sixteen months - it was one of the best experiences I'll ever have.
   I met several wonderful women I would NEVER have met  otherwise.
   I even married one of those girls, you can see her in my avatar.
   For me -  hands down it made my dating better.

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      SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Part of the "arsenal" is a great way to think of it. So glad to hear a few great story's of people meeting and working it out. Some work so many hours hanging out in the right places isn't an option. Thanks for sharing. Dee

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   Globetrekkermelposted 11 years ago

   If anything else, I think online dating made it easier to meet people but the relationships forged usually does not come to par with the old fashion way of courting and dating in real life. There are a few lucky ones that worked out for the best but what I have seen and heard, the norm is that it does not work out.Think about it,  the real face to face old fashioned courtship have not worked, what more for an online dating where everything is fast forward with no checks and balances?

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      SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Yes and the goal should be to grow to the point of seeing one another and spending time. How else do you get to know someone? Nothing beats a hug, holding hands and a good old fashioned kiss to know if what you feel is really "real". Dee

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    rainpurplewineposted 11 years ago

    I have been catfished a few times, some people are masters at playing with their pictures to deceive people.  Theses days with all the technology it' s best to get multiple pictures and try to webcam before actually meeting someone from offline.

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       SEXYLADYDEEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       I don't know why people think its okay fool around with pictures and the truth. There is always a chance you might make an effort to meet them in person. If the true objective is to find someone. Thanks for adding your voice. Dee

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    fahadiliciouzposted 11 years ago

    I see no point in online dating although there is no doubt that it is one of the most popular modes of dating pool throughout the globe. According to my opinion, dating is something that should not be planned as it takes all the fun out of it. On top of that, I believe that online dating has made relationships more disposable as the availability of alternatives creates more chances of separation than staying loyal and committed to each other.

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       dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       A lot of marriages are happening between people that met online.  In addition older busy professionals aren't likely to do the nightclub or other single's scene like the youth. Online dating sites provides them with a proactive way of meeting others.

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    Souther29posted 11 years ago

    I have had quite good experiences with online dating in the past and have had friends who have married after meeting on online dating sites. I'm a very open person anyway but like the idea of knowing a bit about someone before I meet them and helps as you always have things to talk about.
    
    The only issue with this is perhaps you don't have the 'mystery' of knowing nothing about someone and that potential spark to just happen. Never been 'catfished' as you can normally tell who is genuine or not. The golden rule I would say is that the 'free' dating sites are generally more full of scammers than the paid ones and you can just report them pretty easily.

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       dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Amen! There was a time people were afraid to use their credit cards to make online purchases. Today everyone I know of has bought something or reserved hotels using their cc. Online dating is here to stay. Like you I say avoid the free/cheap sites!

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    Mazzy Boleroposted 11 years ago

    I've never used on-line dating, so I haven't personally been "catfished", but it occurs to me that before the Internet you only got to meet psychos if they lived in your neighborhood - now you have the opportunity to meet psychos from all over the world:)  I'm joking but only to an extent. There have been many news stories over the years about women who have been murdered by the lovely kind man they met on-line.  They can easily hide so much of themselves, their past, their characters.  You have no contact with their neighbors, colleagues, family members, who might warn you. I'm sure you can meet the love of your life, but you have to be so very, very careful. 
    
    A male friend of mine did post his photograph on a dating site. Unfortunately, it was one taken about 15 years earlier when he was around 75lbs lighter and had a lot more hair. He got quite a few e-mails very quickly, which was encouraging, but never actually arranged to meet any of the women who responded. I think this is because when he compared his face in the mirror to the one on the dating site, he just couldn't go through with it.  People want to look good on-line and I think they just momentarily forget that they might be required to show up in person:). I think it's probably better to undersell yourself and then have someone look pleasantly surprised when they see you rather than horrified.

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    Healthy Mikeposted 11 years ago

    No, it has merely made it different and complex such that people have different perception of what dating is. If i met my future spouse online, i would be incline to view it as a gamble where what you ask is what you get. It is artificially incubated love. I just love the natural way of stumbling into a stranger in a supermarket, mall, library, school...and the sparks or romance light up!

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