what to do u do when the spark has left your marriage.

1. 51

   taya566posted 14 years ago

   i think what a person should do to rekindle that flame is get to know each other again,and remember what it was when u first met the reason why u liked that person from the beginning .like try communicating without argueing,try a romantic dinner and a movie or even a getaway for the weekend and finally write down your likes and dislikes about that person and hopefully the likes weigh out the dislikes and if u do all that then hopefully some kind of spark rekindles so goodluck.

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      Mark Knowlesposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      One word: Oral.
      
      Good luck.

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      1. 72

         tritrainposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         And you could be right...

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2. 63

   prettydarkhorseposted 14 years ago

   buy a kindle, rekindle I mean! take a break, alternate weekend alone! Time and excitement in a relationship is inversely proportional they say!

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3. 67

   Greek Oneposted 14 years ago

   accurate and suckcinct

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4. 66

   Joy56posted 14 years ago

   why are men so absolutely horrible

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   1. 67

      Greek Oneposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      because reality is absolutely horrible?

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         Joy56posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         men just have one track minds is all

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            Greek Oneposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            well i am assuming that the OP is female, and that her partner is a male... so if men have a one track mind, why not travel down this one track to see if it helps?
            
            If that is the case, provided that the certain act in question has not been part of their history, or has not been part of it for some time, then the performance of said act would no doubt put a 'spark' in things

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5. 63

   prettydarkhorseposted 14 years ago

   you guys are naughtily bad, but very helpful indeed! Do you know that forums are being indexed faster by G these days, you will help a lot of couples now!!

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6. 76

   schoolgirlforrealposted 14 years ago

   both parties have to be willing, not one or the other...

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7. 0

   Home Girlposted 14 years ago

   If you do not have fuel in your car don't suggest going to Florida on a weekend... Not going to work.

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   1. 81

      TamCorposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I don't know why, but that just cracks me up!!!
      
      

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8. 90

   Pamela N Redposted 14 years ago

   Pay more attention to each other. 
   
   There are many reasons why the flame has flickered and depending on your age, how long you've been together and which gender we are talking about it can be many things.
   
   People get busy with kids, work and forget to take care of each other whether that be sex as our bad boys have pointed out or just listening when they talk.
   
   Unless you talk you will never know what is bothering them.

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      Greek Oneposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      "just listening when they talk"...
      
      EXACTLY.. oral!.. it's all about oral communication!
      
      I'm glad a lovely lady also agrees with Mark and I!

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         Joy56posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         you were right all along.

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            Greek Oneposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            *cut, paste, print.. and show to wife*

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            1. 90

               Pamela N Redposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               

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9. 68

   Valentine Logarposted 14 years ago

   Find things to do together, common and shared. Even if you don't necessarily enjoy them look for things you can do.
   
   Examples:
   
   I don't enjoy golf (can't play) husband loves it so I drive the cart.
   
   Husband hates museums I love them but he will go with me now and then without complaint.
   
   Find the compromises that are important to each of you, examples:
   
   I cannot stand to get into an unmade bed, husband couldn't care less. The compromise though is whoever is last out makes the bed these days.
   
   Husband hates doing the yard work, I hate ugly overgrown yards. The compromise, I personally pay to have the yard kept up,
   
   The saying in our house: You don't have to care about the things I care about, you have to care enough about me to participate and compromise on them.
   
   When you like each other rather than resent each other, the spark just naturally sparks to life.

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10. 77

    ar.coltonposted 14 years ago

    Date like you did when you were first together. Dress up, get flowers, flirt, giggle, talk, talk, talk and talk some more.

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       ar.coltonposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       And listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen...etc.

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11. 72

    ddsurfscaposted 14 years ago

    Absence makes the heart grow fonder.  Take a short vacation from one another, and bing bang boom, when you get back together, it is all fresh and new again

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12. 63

    ljv21posted 14 years ago

    In our situation, we have found innocent...well...flirting online has provided a lot of additional excitement to our marriage(12 years)....gives a big ego boost to have someone else find you attractive and interesting to talk to.
    
    Not suggesting affairs, that is just disgusting, but the more we realize that we are living creatures even after marriage can bring a couple closer. Have to say, have heard a lot from both sides...either we have something special or we really have huge problems....never felt that since both of us have always been honest with each other and share everything that we do.
    
    But to make any relationship work, you must have communication....and not have secrets...far too dangerous and cruel to your partner.

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