should an ex be Extinct

1. 38

   NaomiRuthJohnavidposted 13 years ago

   Based on a recent conversation I had with an individual as well as previous conversations, This question bombarded my mind.Being in a relationship,be it that You're married, or just committed to someone ,Do you think that it is wise to remain friends with your previous Partners?.Or should they completely be removed from your life?

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      ASchwartzposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      For me the best solution has always been to completely cut them out of my life. I'm not saying that's the right course for everyone, but I think it makes getting over the relationship easier.
      
      Of course I have a kid with my ex-husband, so that isn't possible. I wouldn't say we are friends, but we are friendly, if that makes sense. We still go to parent-teacher conferences and our sons activities together, but that's about it. I wouldn't hesitate to pick up the phone and call him, but only if it's about our son.

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2. 70

   Cagsilposted 13 years ago

   It would be wise to be removed from being around at all. Why? Because, friendship isn't going to be possible. Why not? Because friendship is the foundation for any successful relationship and if they are no longer going to have a relationship with you, then it was a relationship not founded on the strongest basis to begin with.

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3. 74

   Mighty Momposted 13 years ago

   A lot of people seem to be able to be friends with their exes.
   If the person was supposed to be your friend they would have been your friend, not your lover.
   Personally, I think it's cleaner and saner to cut the cord.

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4. 38

   NaomiRuthJohnavidposted 13 years ago

   hmm...nicely put Might Mom...However what would you say if those individuals started off as good friends first then elevated to being your partner but things didnt work out,would it be wrong to go back to being just their friend?

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5. 38

   NaomiRuthJohnavidposted 13 years ago

   good point Cagsil

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6. 60

   Disturbiaposted 13 years ago

   Personally, I feel that if you can, cut the cord completely, however that is not always possible. If you have children together, you are attached to your ex forever through those children, whether you like it or not. So for the sake of your kids and to makes things as easy and painless as possible, it makes sense to maintain a polite relationship. But if there are no children, walk away and don't look back. It's better for future relationships too. Who wants to have an old ex always hanging around?

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   1. 38

      NaomiRuthJohnavidposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      i like that response

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7. 84

   WriteAngledposted 13 years ago

   I certainly wish my ex would become extinct!

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8. 95

   Cardisaposted 13 years ago

   I think it all depends on the situation and certain factors.
   
   Was the relationship a good relationship and did it end amicably with an understanding? In this case maybe you both decided that you didn't really belong together and you both have no hard feelings towards each other. In the same case, you love each other platonically and respect each other. Let me clarify this "good relationship". You are fond of each other, you don't really have any problems except you are not in love and you both know it's going nowhere. I had a relationship like that and we went back to being friends. Sometimes two friends mistakenly believe that because they love each other so much that maybe they would make the ideal couple.
   
   But you still need to consider the feelings of your present partner and how they will handle a friendship like that.
   
   If the relationship was rocky and ended badly with hurt feelings and residual emotional baggage it can only get worse so cut the ties.

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9. 38

   NaomiRuthJohnavidposted 13 years ago

   hmm...really insightful Cardisa

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10. 0

    Arlene V. Pomaposted 13 years ago

    We all have choices when it comes to relationships.
    
    Personally, as far as men are concerned, I like a clean break once the relationship has gone south.  I am on my second and final marriage.  I'm not screwing up this time.  Therefore, the only man I love and have time for is my current and FINAL husband.  To be friends with an ex??? Absolutely not!  Much better to walk away and not look back.  What broke you up in the first place will most likely rear its ugly head down the road.

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11. 38

    NaomiRuthJohnavidposted 13 years ago

    I agree with you Arlene

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