Can gay men straighten up?

1. 72

   sparksdaniel2000posted 14 years ago

   Can gay men straighten up?
   
   can gay people change their minds and say they're straight at any time?

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2. 83

   stricktlydatingposted 14 years ago

   I don't think so.  They may try - because it might be easier if they could fit into the social 'norm' but it's very unlikely to work for any length of time.  It would be just as hard for a straight man to try to turn gay!  It just doesn't work if it's not who you are.

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3. 60

   kansaposted 14 years ago

   I wonder about your motivation for asking this question - are you talking about yourself? It is like many things in life, there is no black & white answer. Gay men and women go through many confusing periods in their lives where they cross the line on either side in search for acceptance from themselves and from others. Men are somewhat different than women in the way that they can have sexual encounters with no emotions attached. A man can live a straight life with occassional gay sexual encounters and still see himself as straight. Not many women can do this as women are usually very emotional and get attached more easily.

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4. 60

   Dark knight ridesposted 14 years ago

   About as well as a straight person can change their mind and say their gay. I'll assume you mean this question from the perspective of "Is being homosexual a choice or is it hardwired in?" And the answer is, no one knows for sure. There are people who argue both ways. I've seen camps that promise to make the gay straight again, but they rarely work. It just teaches people how to cover up their true feelings and desires.
   
   And why should it matter? Why must people get so caught up in the relationships of other people? If a person is happy in a homosexual relationship, then there's no reason to expect them to want to change things.

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5. 72

   sparksdaniel2000posted 13 years ago

   To Kansa, I am not talking about myself, I was actually just asking because I know people who have experimented sexually and feel free to label themselves accordingly. So one of my friends went through a "gay" phase in his life but is not gay. I have never had a desire to try and am happily married. I am not against anyone trying to live their life or to anyone's natural freedoms of expression. Thanks for your answers guys.

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6. 79

   brimancandyposted 13 years ago

   Being a gay man I would say that the answer to your question is two-fold. Yes, of course they can say that they are straight, and say they are gay at the same time. A lot of gay men are quite good at doing that, and nobody would know the difference.
   
   A good example of this would be Brokeback Mountain. The two men were in love with each other, while being married and fathering children, and neither of them would admit to being queer not even to each other. There are still men who have sex with men, who will never call themselves gay, so they certainly can say that they are straight, and believe it too.  Lord knows I have met enough of them.
   
   So, the two-fold part would be NO, if your question regards not having gay sex all together, the individual will never give up his or her desire to have a same sex partner, even if they don't act on it, they will still want to do it.
   
   In my opinion, there are various levels of what is considered straight and gay. And, that is why so many people are so confused for years about which they are. Some men will think they are gay, even if they never have sex with another man.
   While some straight men will have sex with lots of men, and never admit that they did it at all.
   
   So, in general, the answer would be closer to maybe. Would you know that I was gay if I didn't tell you I was? A lot of people are very surprised when I tell them.
   
   I could go around telling everyone I was straight if I wanted to. I just don't.

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