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Andy McGuire profile image

Andy McGuire

Joined 5 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

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Andy McGuire types before a live studio audience


There is the man I am, and there is the man I completely made up. I leave it to you to figure out what is true and what isn't about this man I am (or am not).

I was born in the greater Seattle area in the year of our Lord, 1755. My mother was a stay at home mom and my father was an unusually good-natured T-rex. Together they raised a self-described "delightful lunatic."
I moved to Los Angeles in pursuit of a career and a pretty girl. I'm still working on the career and the girl turned out to be an multi-tentacled alien! Go figure.

Until just recently, I wished nothing more than to be a homicide detective/ninja assassin/male stripper because that would have been an awesome business card to have, but a brain tumor the size of a small giraffe derailed that once bright and hopeful future.
Now, I wish to write! I want to write film scripts, comedy sketches, online articles laced with absurd humor, and Russian erotic ballet fiction.

I moved to California at the dawn of 2012 and after 1 year of being here.....I have accomplished nothing. But that's okay because I am still here and I still have a long life ahead of me to acheive my new dreams, assuming the mafia doesn't find out who I really am and where I live.

Is this biography too long? Am I boring you? My apologies, I tend to ramble.

Let me wrap this up by saying it is my intention here to entertain you, to enlighten you, to put a smile on your face, and maybe persuade you to let me borrow, like, 50 bucks. I'll pay you back next week, I swear.

UPDATE: I just created a new Facebook page called, "The Delightful Lunatic," that will feature many points of inspired hilarity such as this article (only shorter of course), so please like my page Facebook.com/thedelightfullunatic. Thanks, and tell your friends about it!

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