I would like feedback on my article

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  1. Susan Sears profile image91
    Susan Searsposted 4 years ago

    https://hubpages.com/travel/Lighthouse- … t-Michigan


    I would like feedback on my article - this article has been featured but not accepted onto another site - any suggestions?

    1. theraggededge profile image96
      theraggededgeposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Susan,

      I'm not sure why the article hasn't been accepted, but it could do with a good edit for minor grammatical problems. For example, the first sentence could be improved by saying,

      "The Great Lakes that surround Michigan are massive bodies of water where there is a plethora of shipping industries and leisure boating."

      Under 'Charlevoix', you've used 'mear', instead of 'mere'.

      I would suggest you read the text out loud in order to pick up awkward sentence structure and passive voice.

      Good luck with this - I noticed you already have one on Wander Wisdom for the southern lighthouses, so it makes sense to have this on on too.

    2. Eurofile profile image95
      Eurofileposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      I noticed that you have quite a few blue headline titles. Maybe you could simplify the article a little by taking the titles off the photo capsules and placing the photos below the relevant text capsules. When I joined HubPages I was advised to download a free version of Grammarly, which has been very helpful for correcting errors.
      I agree with theraggededge. If you read through your article, you might find parts which you can rewrite. Maybe you could try shorter, sharper sentences instead of some of the longer ones. Sometimes on HubPages  you have to persevere until your hub gets put on a niche site.

    3. quotations profile image86
      quotationsposted 4 years agoin reply to this

      I would second the comment by @theraggededge and point out that there are a number of typos and grammatical errors, which often will disqualify you from a network site.

      For example "In Case your lost" should be "In Case you're lost" or even better "you are lost"

      Also, I am not sure if this is intentional or not, but you frequently refer to the lighthouses as simply "light". Is that a common usage? For SEO purposes, lighthouse would seem to be the better choice.

      An example:



      The main thing is you should proofread your hub carefully and fix all of the grammatical and spelling mistakes. Consider using  grammarly or a similar program, or getting someone else to proofread it for you. Sometimes it is hard to spot your own mistakes because you know what you meant to write and your mind overlooks the errors.

    4. Kenna McHugh profile image92
      Kenna McHughposted 4 years ago

      Your content is fine but needs some tweaking as Bev suggested.  I compared your other lighthouse article to the one that moved over to WanderWisdom. The first thing I noticed is the one you are trying to feature has more photos. I'd try cutting those back and focus on the photos of the lighthouses.

    5. Susan Sears profile image91
      Susan Searsposted 4 years ago

      Thank you everyone for the advise...I will see what happens

     
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