Who are you.....JEALOUS of or do you ....ENVY & why?

  1. gmwilliams profile image85
    gmwilliamsposted 19 months ago

    Who are you.....JEALOUS of or do you ....ENVY & why?


  2. WordCrafter09 profile image79
    WordCrafter09posted 19 months ago

    Pretty much no one.   I think the only time I felt even a twinge of jealousy (or envy - the difference isn't all that clear in some ways/uses) was several  years ago when I saw two teen-age girls who were very unattractive, had a whole lot more figure flaws than I did, and appeared pretty obviously thrilled with themselves.  I didn't want to "be them", but I kind of envied the fact that their behavior/talk indicated obvious "being thrilled with themselves"; when, while I have, I think, a pretty objective standard for what's positive and what isn't, I've made a certain amount of peace with my own external/appearance flaws but certainly can't be proud of any of them.  (And while I certainly don't think people should ever feel shame about their flaws, there's not being ashamed because of them and then there's seeming to be so oblivious to them that someone struts around, talks, and dresses in a way that I'll never have the (what I see as) unjustified and strutting confidence to have.

    I know they were young (but I was young once too, and had a whole lot fewer external flaws than these two girls had; and still naver had that kind of confidence).  Part of me thinks it's obnoxious and wouldn't want it.  Part of me did kind of envy it in those two girls.

    Other than that, I never envied anyone or felt jealousy (when I was younger or today).  Considering my interests and values and aims, there wasn't much that I couldn't have done if I'd wanted to do it.  I was a girl and small (and it was the sixties), so I knew I'd never be a basketball player (and didn't want to be anyway).  In those days "Word" as that small girls could never be "airline stewardesses" (OK with me); and I always knew I'd never be fashion model/super-model material (also OK with me, particularly in view of my issue with "the strutting thing"" - not to mention "just not the material" ). 

    Again, OK with me.   I didn't want to be "valued" for my appearance anyway (but good for those who can earn a living that way if they want to..).

    I grew up knowing what was important in life and have enough things go on to be reminded and to not-take-for-granted any of those "most important" things (OR to spend my brain-time/emotions on the superficial foolishness of keeping an imaginary score card on "me compared to whoever else".  There are things I want/wish I had but don't experience that as envying someone who has them.   I'm not one to resent other people and just keep working on/with what I do have.