Does it ever bother you when you treat your children better then you were ever treated?
I don't begrudge how I treat my boys but as I care for them I sometimes find myself envying them. Is that strange, why or why not?
No way. If it bothered me that I treated my children better than I was treated, then I would be putting my ego before what should be the truth--that my children are treated well by their mother. I do not feel envy, though, so perhaps my response isn't average.
The "bother" comes from a pricked conscience. The envy is what bothers me at times.
Personally I think my parents treated me better than I treated my own kids. Why - well I was a single mum and had to work away a lot, my folks helped bring my kids up. Having come from a home where Mum and Dad were always there involving us in things and making sure we got the right disciplin etc, I did not know what it was to NOT HAVE parents around all the time. Because I had a great childhood with my folks I naturally thought they would have a great childhood with them too. I did not realise I was what they needed to have a great childhood. What bothers me is that I did not give them what I took for granted and that was a Mum and Dad there at all times. However they turned out great and because they both know what it was like to not have parents with them all the time, they are making sure their kids have what they not experience. Sorry to waffle on.
I am glad you waffled, if you would. It seems you have the basis for a writen work there that only needs personal clarity. These questions are meant as writing prompts. It seems that in your case it was successful.
I vowed, as did my husband, that my children would NEVER have to worry about insecurity, absentee parents, or putting my wants and needs above theirs....I swore I would not do to my children what was done to me and, although, I live pretty much in the opposite way society dictates (I'm a stay at home mom), I have given my children what I so desperately needed growing up - a parent who is always there should they need me, encouragement, love, and security. Although I wish that I could have had parents like we are to our children, I do not envy them, our choices are our own.
I'm very happy for you. Keep up the good work.
It should never bother anyone when they have the opportunity to treat their children better than they themselves were treated while growing up. It should be pride that you feel, not envy. Perhaps envy is the wrong word to be using anyway. It is OK to feel the pride in being a good parent, and also the sadness in knowing that you were not able to experience what your children are blessed to experience.
But, by realizing that your able to do better for your children is also experiencing what you missed by participating in your children's blessings as well.
So, be proud of what you are able do for your children, and in yourself for not doing to your children what your parents did (or did not) do for you.
If deprivation were the extent of my experience perhaps I wouldn't feel the way I do.
Not at all. My goal when my husband and I had children was to always give them a better life than what we had. Not only monetary but emotionally, mentally and our time, we wanted them to have a stable positive life. So far we are blessed that we have been able to accomplish this and I am grateful for being given the opportunity to give them everything they have.
I never feel jealousy or envy since I am proud that I had some impact in having them become the individuals they are now. They make me proud everyday.
I was treated very well as a child, but there are things I do different than my mother. I don't feel bad because I want the best for my children. I believe my mother wanted the best for me, too. There are some things I am less strict about than she was, yet there are other things I am more strict than she was.
Raising well-rounded children should be our goal. We must discipline and love our children. There are good and bad consequences for many actions, and we should teach our children to be responsible for their actions. Being appropriate with our actions and reactions is what parents need to concentrate on. :-)
Making sure my sons are loved and treated justly and with respect is a point of pride for me. I want each of my boys to avoid the pitfalls I had to endure growing up. I love my children with all my heart, therefore I am happy that they will never have to see or experience what I had to endure.
I don't envy my sons for having a better childhood than I did...I intentionally planned it that way and worked hard to make it happen. Praise be to God.
I had a very happy childhood, but if my children have it even better, I'm all for it. Of course, they benefit from more creature comforts, due to the difference in generations, but the most important question is : are they happy? I am old enough to remember the days when my grandparents didn't have running water in their house and no electricity, so I can measure the progress that has been made over the past fifty years or so. Would they be happy for me that I don't have to fetch water a hundred feet from the house and break the ice the to fill my bucket ? I think so!
I grew up with no elec/water/indoor toilet. we carried water in, used an outhouse, heated water on a wood stove, had gas lamps. Not a hardship if U know nothing else. Kids today do not appreciate what they have & expect even more.
Imagine if all the power stopped on this planet-especially the US-I don't think a lot of people would adjust too well.
No. What gets me irked is when the children, after you do everything for them that you are able to, are unappreciative. They will throw a fit if you do not buy them something. My older daughter was like that-one time she wanted a new cell phone because hers broke. I politely told her that she would have to wait a couple of weeks because I was tied up with bills. She kept harping me and she finally get the message when I yelled at her to get out of my face. She's older now and in college and understands a lot better.
Most intelligent, caring, & thinking parents treat their children better than they were treated in childhood. It is par for the course. Most parents want to do this & are PROUD of this.
by nightwork4 9 years ago
if you had a hard childhood, did it help make you a better person as an adult?for people who's childhood was bad, did you learn from it and give what wasn't given to you as you became an adult?
by Marissa 13 years ago
In what ways do you/will you treat your children differently than you were treated as a child?
by Catsandogs 11 years ago
'Treat others the way you wish to be treated'? A fundamental rule to life?Widely referred to as the 'Golden Rule' Should we all live by this rule? Could this make an individual a better person?I'd love to hear others opinions. Thank you!
by Grace Marguerite Williams 12 years ago
If your parents were strict, were you thankful/resentful and what lessons did you learn fromthis experience?
by NikiDiva 12 years ago
To anyone that has ever lost a loved one or someone close to them what did that loss teach you?
by Grace Marguerite Williams 6 years ago
What was the IMPACT of your birth order on you? What life lessons did you LEARN from your birth order? If you had children from the SAME birth order as you, did you treat them better than YOU were treated?
Copyright © 2024 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
Copyright © 2024 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective owners.
As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.
For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy
Show DetailsNecessary | |
---|---|
HubPages Device ID | This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons. |
Login | This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service. |
Google Recaptcha | This is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy) |
Akismet | This is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Google Analytics | This is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Traffic Pixel | This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. |
Amazon Web Services | This is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy) |
Cloudflare | This is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Hosted Libraries | Javascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy) |
Features | |
---|---|
Google Custom Search | This is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Maps | Some articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Charts | This is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy) |
Google AdSense Host API | This service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Google YouTube | Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Vimeo | Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Paypal | This is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Login | You can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Maven | This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy) |
Marketing | |
---|---|
Google AdSense | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Google DoubleClick | Google provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Index Exchange | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Sovrn | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Ads | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Unified Ad Marketplace | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
AppNexus | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Openx | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Rubicon Project | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
TripleLift | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Say Media | We partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy) |
Remarketing Pixels | We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites. |
Conversion Tracking Pixels | We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service. |
Statistics | |
---|---|
Author Google Analytics | This is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy) |
Comscore | ComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Tracking Pixel | Some articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy) |
Clicksco | This is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy) |