Why does it seem like guys leave me after we have sex together?

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  1. profile image51
    Dajanay Evansposted 8 years ago

    Why does it seem like guys leave me after we have sex together?

    Do he find me unattractive? Did he use me?
    I'm angry, and I just want to sit in my room everyday and cry. I know everyone makes mistakes and can be forgotten about. But this one seems permanent. How could I let myself go that easily? Did he even love me like he said he did? It's only so much I can take. But some way and some how, I have to move forward, with my head held high and respect not only my body but myself more.

  2. profile image0
    LoliHeyposted 8 years ago

    It's not that you are unattractive--if he thought that, he wouldn't have approached you at all (unless it was 2 am and he was real drunk).  Yes, he did use you, and no, he does not love you.  Guys leave girls all the time after sex, especially if you two just met.  That's all they wanted to begin with.  When a guy asks me out for a first date, and then says that afterwards we can go hang out at his place, red flags go up.  He's only interested in one thing.  Some people may say that instant sex can lead to real love, but those are the exception, not the rule.  My advice would be to stop having sex for at least 5 to 8 dates.  Really, you should wait until marriage, only then can you be sure that he loves you.  But if you are not going to wait, there is always the chance that he is not that serious about you at all.  I've know women who had been in a serious relationship (or so they thought) for fives months, only for the guy to disappear into thin air.  So, do NOT have sex.  Even if you want to.  Why don't you both try to get to know each other?  If he doesn't want to do that, or won't wait, then chances are he would have left after sex anyway.

    1. Express10 profile image79
      Express10posted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Exactly!

  3. Express10 profile image79
    Express10posted 8 years ago

    This is because you are allowing yourself to be used and because neither of you have made the effort to truly get to know one another. You are not giving yourself and them time which is very important. You can choose to wait a set period of time, wait until there is a monogamous commitment in place, or both to have sex with someone. Your sexual and standard health is very important. Sex should be more than an act or a way to put yourself out there to hopefully get someone to like you. Is your body and health not more valued than this? YES! Conduct yourself as such.

  4. Aime F profile image72
    Aime Fposted 8 years ago

    I'm sorry that someone you thought loved you ended up using you.  I have been there and it hurts.  But it will get better. 

    If you thought that you were in a loving relationship, I don't think you've made any mistakes.  Unfortunately some people will use your trust and your feelings to get what they want and completely disregard how it affects you.  That's not on you - that's about their bad character, so don't be too hard on yourself. 

    If you had just recently met someone and not discussed each other's feelings/intentions, then that's something you should definitely do next time.  A lack of communication could result in one of you wanting a committed relationship and the other just wanting sex, and no one knows there's a disconnect. 

    You are always in control of your own body.  Don't let anyone pressure you into doing something you don't want to do if you don't feel ready or don't trust them.  But also don't punish yourself over someone else leading you on if you really thought you COULD trust them.  As I said, that's on them.  I think a lot of us have put our faith in the wrong person at some point in our lives.

  5. profile image51
    kettygarneffposted 6 years ago

    Life has taught me that you can’t control someone’s loyalty. No matter how good you are to them it doesn’t mean that they will treat you the same way. I have been dating to my boyfriend for two years with no idea he was cheating. Suddenly i started noticing changes in behavior, i suspected something was wrong. So i confided in a friend who convinced and introduced me to a hacker. He was able to hack into my husband mobile phone, Email and Whats App . It seemed as though my life was spinning out of control getting to find out he has someone else. I filed for a devours just could not continue with lies. If you feel you are been exploited in your marriage and you need proof. I suggest you give scottcyberlord11@gmail. com what's app +162 8204 3588 Text +185 0631 5597  a try. He has been of great help to me and i believe he can be to you.

  6. bluesradio profile image55
    bluesradioposted 6 years ago

    There are a couple of possibilities...One, he may have committment issues, and after having sex with you, is afraid to tell with those very real feelings that a sexual relationship create...Two, he could have found you attractive at first, but then after undressing the package, found something he did not like, and that could be something as simple as a blemish or something else.....Sounds like whatever is going on, it is he with the issues and not you!!!

 
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