What do you think is the biggest challenge a parent(s) faces?

1. 76

   Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years ago

   What do you think is the biggest challenge a parent(s) faces?
   
   Please explain.

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2. 57

   shahkar-khanposted 10 years ago

   "SETTING AN EXAMPLE YOURSELF".
   I think it is the biggest challenge any parent faces because our children unconsciously follow everything we do. As they say 'an apple never falls much away from its tree'. It is the way you are, that will influence your children.
   I you are loser all your life, (generally) your children will be the same.
   
   It is easily observable that the habits of a family are similar it many ways. For example, if parents wake up early in the morning, you will observe that children also do the same. If parents are punctual so will be the children.
   
   So for me the biggest challenge for any parent would be to set an example him/herself.

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   1. 76

      Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      This is doubly challenging if a child has two different examples in their parents.  One is strict, the other permissive...very confusing for a child.  Setting a good example is critical because it lends credibility to the parent.

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3. 94

   cat on a soapboxposted 10 years ago

   I think one of the biggest challenges is having the courage to make unpopular decisions and taking the risk that your child might say that he/she hates you. Over the years I told my daughter that I was here to be her mother and not her friend. I also prepared her when she was young and very close to me that the time would come when she wouldn't like the decisions I made, but that I would make them out of love and concern for her safety. She is 19, and we are now enjoying a friendship w/ mutual respect for each other. There has never been any doubt that my love is unconditional even when I've had to draw the line.

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   1. 76

      Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      It's good to know that your "risk" paid off.  It's a well established fact that the teenage brain is not fully developed and decison making and planning are not fully matured.  You have given your daughter a great gift.

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4. 90

   cam8510posted 10 years ago

   Hi Bruce, Wow, great question.  My wife and I raised two sons who are now happy, well adjusted, emotionally healthy adults.  Sadly my wife passed away a little over five years ago.  But here is what I've learned over the past twenty-eight years of being a father and watching my wife be an absolutely awesome mother. 
   
   A parent's biggest challenge is themselves.  If a person will become a successful parent, he/she will come to terms with-
        -Pride-It's all about me.
        -Selfishness-Its all about what is mine.
        -Addictions-The ultimate me and mine.
   A successful parent is someone who has largely dealt with the basic social issues regarding themselves and other people.  They understand that meeting the needs of their child and knowing what those needs truly are, are their primary responsibilities in his/her life, at least until the child is an adult. 
   
   What all this adds up to is that a person needs to grow up before they become a parent.  If they never do grow up or if they have to do it simultaneously with being a parent, that fact will show up in their child's life.

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   1. 76

      Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      So sorry for your loss, she sounds like she was a remarkable lady.  You make some excellent points in regards to growing up.  Looks like your children were blessed to have the two of you for parents.

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      cam8510posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Bruce and thanks for the opportunity to share some of what I have learned.  It is an excellent question and there is valuable information in each of the answers by these fellow hubbers.

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5. 59

   Disappearingheadposted 10 years ago

   Trying to make ends meet. Bringing up children is horrendously expensive what with child care, holidays, clothing, entertainment, etc, etc. Financial pressures are the root cause of strife and relationship breakdown in many families.

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   1. 76

      Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, it is very difficult to raise a family in tough financial conditions. What makes it really tough is a consumer culture that preys on families.

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6. 45

   DDEposted 10 years ago

   The biggest challenge parents face is to live with their growing teens. Modern  days have become demanding and parents find it difficult to understand  the needs of their teens.  Parents feel they can decide for their children but the reality is that does not exist anymore once  a child shows responsibility they are on their own, the  past traits of generations before don't work and this is hard to cope with for most parents. Communication is another problem faced by many families. Respect,  the setting of goals for children parents must realize they can't speak or think for their children anymore.

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   1. 76

      Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Teens of any generation have always needed structure, routine, boundaries, love and respect. The problem is that some of us emphasize structure and routine over love and respect.  Teens want to know that they matter,are heard, and have a voice.

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7. 84

   wychicposted 10 years ago

   Letting them make their own mistakes. There are so many challenges to choose from, so it's really hard to call one "most," but so many parents struggle with this. As kids grow, you see them making mistakes that you made yourself and severely regretted. One can give advice, but ultimately it's futile and damaging to try to control the situation if the kid/teen doesn't take the advice. Taking a step back and watching them get hurt because it's what they need to learn and grow is a huge challenge.

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      cat on a soapboxposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      So true!

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   2. 76

      Bruce A. Beaudetposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, it's really difficult to watch people you love make negative impacting decisions.  As Barbara Coloroso says' "we need to teach children how think, not what to think."  Kids/teens are not mini adults, they are people in and of themselves!

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8. 68

   MargaritaEdenposted 10 years ago

   I think for me it is knowing the right and the best decisions in raising my kids. I am making the right choice in each particular situation that would effect their lives...

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