Do we turn into our parent/s whether we like it or not?

1. 59

   annaglomeshposted 13 years ago

   Do we turn into our parent/s whether we like it or not?

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2. 40

   ChristinSposted 13 years ago

   I don't think so - do we tend to be like those we are raised by, yes out of habit.  However, habits can be changed.  For example my parenting style is nothing like my parents (thankfully).  My mother and I enjoy some similar personality characteristics and hobbies, but there are some fundamental differences of opinion I had with my parents over the years and I worked consciously to not fall into some of the same traps.

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   1. 59

      annaglomeshposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I agree in parenting styles many do their utmost to do it differently than their parents, but I find it interesting how the little characteristics of my mother and father have crept into my personality as I have aged ... the last thing I imagined..

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3. 63

   Lisa HWposted 13 years ago

   I don't think so.  In fact, I think what may happen as often as not is that people decide they will NEVER be like their parents in one way or another, and sometimes those people make it a point to be different from their parents even if/when their parents may have been right in how they handled something or what they thought.
   
   With me, there was a whole lot about both of my parents that I decided to emulate.  Then again, there were a few things they did that I decided I'd never do.  How it seems to have worked with me is that I assessed each thing they did or were, decided whether or not I was impressed by it, and chose what to emulate and what to do differently.
   
   I think it's important for kids to understand why parents do, are, or think something because too often kids misinterpret motives and reasons parents do, are, or thinking something; and reject solid principles/practices based on not understanding the reasons behind them.  Blindly emulating and admiring parents isn't always the best thing either, but I think most people don't do that.
   
   One other thing can happen, though:   We get to be a parent and a certain age and have a child of a certain age and - voila - we finally discover why it is our parents did or thought something when we were that age; and we discover that their reasons were solid and our reasons with our own child are the same as theirs once were.

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