jump to last post 1-10 of 10 discussions (19 posts)

Living With Regrets

85
gmwilliamsposted 6 years ago
What do you regret doing. If you could change that regret, what would you have done differently to have a better and/or more stressfree life.
reply report
1. 60
  kessposted 6 years agoin reply to this
  Regrets lies in the way you think...
  
  You think there was a better way.
  You think you could have done better.
  You think you could have chosen a different path..
  
  etc.
  etc.
  
  Forgetting that all those thing make you you
  and to change one would mean a change in the you.
  
  So the you having regrets would have been lost
  if none of the regrets were present.
  
  So think differently....
  
  And in thinking different there are no regrets... and you preserve the present you...everyday all daylong.
  reply report
  50
  waddlethroughposted 5 years agoin reply to this
  Thanks for this comment, about six months ago my wife had a miscarriage and off and on since I've tortured myself about what I could have done different/better to get the required help that may have avoided the outcome, in short I felt I let down my own son, but one thing that helped with this struggle was what your comment said, I had thought about this myself but it was nice to hear it reaffirmed, in fact it brought tears to my eyes that I haven't shed for months, thanks for your words, they mean a lot.
  reply report
2. 78
  AshtonFireflyposted 6 years agoin reply to this
  I regret being too afraid to stand up for my own safety and happiness in a variety of situations.
  However, the best thing I can do it learn from the situation and move on...
  reply report
81
formosangirlposted 6 years ago
I am pretty opinionated, and I do express my opinion. My husband tells me that I am a great lawyer but a terrible employee. So, if I could do it over and turn the clock back to 16 years ago, I would set my opinion aside before entering the office and continue to do this. Being an individualist/realist does not pay off sometimes. Nobody wants to hear the truth. I am trying to teach my kids this lesson.
reply report
1. 0
  Home Girlposted 6 years agoin reply to this
  I procrastinated a lot. I've lost time. I've lost something I cannot turn back. That's what I am trying NOT to regret.
  reply report
84
louiseelcrossposted 6 years ago
I regret not moving to warmer climates when I was diagnosed with raynauds. I spent 3 years in bed trying to stay warm. I was depressed, had no will to live and was in pain. Now I know that I will make the 2000 miles move for the sake of my health and sanity. I regret much time in my life wasted on worrying about things that I cannot even remember today. Take it from someone in their fifties, dont waste life, you only got one chance of it so do everything you want to do that will bring fun and happiness into your life, dont waste time worrying. x
reply report
1. 0
  Home Girlposted 6 years agoin reply to this
  ' I regret much time in my life wasted on worrying about things that I cannot even remember today.' I can fully relate to that. We have a precious gift of life and we spend it on silly things so often! We afraid to live, to be happy, to make friends, to have relationships, to change our life, to move; we wait, and wait and suffer and in the end many things are simply too late. So many of us do that, me included...
  reply report
72
Lisa HWposted 6 years ago
I just had this whole "regrets debate" on a Hub I wrote about regrets; and I still don't think I managed to convey that all regrets cannot be processed or viewed the way a lot of them (admittedly most, maybe; or at least the "standard variety")can be.

A person's choices or lack of better options in choices can be affected by others' people's mistakes and/or by other people creating a situation that has nothing whatsoever with the individual who will later regret what has happened as a result. We don't live in a vacuum and aren't always dealing with a situation that includes keeping others' peoples contribution to our own regrets possible. Going by "rules of preventing, or dealing with, regrets" doesn't always apply; because even if we know the rules and always play by them, other people often have little regard for the "rules of living".

There's no doubt that what we regret changes us, but it's not always for the better, or for the happier. All change is not good change. In fact, it is sometimes "for the more isolated" (because people who believe that adhering to a neat little set of rules for preventing, and dealing with, regrets are all that anyone needs to understand.

I'm not completely disagreeing with what the OP has said, but I think the only way it could be completely accurate would be to add: "In a lot of cases, and with most types of regrets..." to what has been offered here.

Sometimes what we regret is not being able to stop others from preventing us from being able to follow those "rules of life" that can so often work well under normal circumstances. Sometimes it's our following all those rules of life that actually leads us to regret.

Sometimes believing that we can keep things in life great, and in perspective, by following a few simple rules is for the young, the luckiest, and those who live enough of a "vacuum" that love, relationships, and a lot of real life don't complicate matters very much.
reply report
93
paradigmsearchposted 6 years ago
"Living With Regrets"

If I could turn back time
If I could find a way I'd take back those words that hurt you and you'd stay

I don't know why I did the things I did I don't know why I said the things I said
Pride's like a knife it can cut deep inside
Words are like weapons they wound sometimes.

I didn't really mean to hurt you I didn't wanna see you go I know I made you cry, but baby

[Chorus:]
If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that hurt you
And you'd stay
If I could reach the stars
I'd give them all to you
Then you'd love me, love me
Like you used to do

If I could turn back time

My world was shattered I was torn apart
Like someone took a knife and drove it deep in my heart
You walked out that door I swore that I didn't care
But I lost everything darling then and there

Too strong to tell you I was sorry
Too proud to tell you I was wrong
I know that I was blind, and ooh...

[Chorus]

Ooohh

If I could turn back time
If I could turn back time
If I could turn back time
ooh baby

I didn't really mean to hurt you
I didn't want to see you go
I know I made you cry
Ooohh

[Chorus #2]
If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that hurt you
If I could reach the stars
I'd give them all to you
Then you'd love me, love me
Like you used to do

If I could turn back time (turn back time)
If I could find a way (find a way)
Then baby, maybe, maybe
You'd stay

[to fade]
Reach the stars
If I could reach the stars

CHER LYRICS
reply report
81
Reality Bytesposted 6 years ago
Regrets? I've had a few,
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.

Sinatra
reply report
1. 70
  tamronposted 5 years agoin reply to this
  Reality Bytes
  I want you to know no matter what I love the person you are even if we have shared some differences. Thats OK! We all Have regrets! Nobody has lived a perfect life.
  
  My regrets that I live with is giving my daughter up for adoption and chose drugs over my son.
  
  I feel like I should burn in hell! I still do!
  reply report
  81
  Reality Bytesposted 5 years agoin reply to this
  Thank you for this. Civil discussions fascinate me, disagreement adds extra spice to the conversation!
  
  reply report
59
wixorposted 6 years ago
I remember this quote, but not who wrote it:

What might have been ain't necessarily what WOULD have been.
reply report
85
gmwilliamsposted 5 years ago
Thank you all for your insightful, thoughtful, and wonderful responses. The greatest regret is not living in and fully embrace the present moment!
reply report
85
Mighty Momposted 5 years ago
"We shall not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it."
It's important to make peace with what has happened in our lives -- good and bad.
I'm learning the value of self-forgiveness as the sane alternative to beating myself up constantly with "coulda/shoulda/woulda."
The point is, I either did (and shouldn't have) or didn't) and should have.
But it's done.
Live in today.
reply report
1. 70
  tamronposted 5 years agoin reply to this
  Mighty Mom
  You are so awesome! I agree with you! We all get tripped some way or another and I do regret the past. Before I had my son and Daughter I was trying to adopt my uncles daughter. I had her for over a year they never so much as called. All of a sudden they showed up at my "day care center" with cops and took her away 2 weeks later they lost her. She was then adopted when I already petition for adoption so ya I am bitter.
  
  Then years latter I got screwed up with drugs and lost both my son and daughter. What really suck my son is 21 yrs old I thought he was going to be 18 in Dec.
  reply report
64
PeppermintPaddyposted 5 years ago
Stress-free doesn't necessarily mean the best life.
reply report
1. 70
  tamronposted 5 years agoin reply to this
  No you can't evade all stress! I try to avoid unnecessary stress.
  reply report