Do you think that children who grow up with siblings are happier?

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   Wasteless Projectposted 11 years ago

   Do you think that children who grow up with siblings are happier?
   
   How much difference do siblings really make in a child's life? What are your own and your kids experiences?

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   Michelle Widmannposted 11 years ago

   I don't think that's necessarily the case. I always thought I would be much happier as an only child. Parents can get distracted with too many children, or choose favourites, and leave other children feeling more lonely than if they were only children getting all of a parent's love.

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      You are so right, when there is more than one child in the family, there is oftentimes sibling rivalry There is also favoritism &preferential treatment of one child over others.Siblings can be treated unequally based upon birth order etc.

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3. 62

   Lisa HWposted 11 years ago

   I think how secure and happy children are depends primarily on whether their parents (or even parent) are very capable and loving - not on whether they have siblings or not.  Other factors in a child's life can kick in and have some impact, but in general I think a happy, secure, childhood is mostly a matter of how the parents contribute to that.  Parents can also contribute to unhappy childhoods, whether they don't know how to help an only child or a child with one or more siblings who contribute to his unhappiness in some way.
   
   Having had siblings myself, though, and having three children of my own; I've noticed that with each person with whom we have a close relationship, and with each person whose relationship we get to observe as a child with the same parents but also as a sibling, we get to have additional "perspective"/insight introduced to what would be a far narrower, more "tunneled", view of life and relationships when we have siblings.
   
   Well, in general, with as many close and good relationships that we're fortunate enough to have in this life also tends to come more enrichment.  We're enriched when we have great parents, enriched by having people like close aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, etc.  We're definitely enriched and enlightened when we have children (if we're normal).  AND, as all those relationships continue to grow so do we, and so does the more grown-up type of enrichment we gain from them.
   
   As with adults who choose to remain childless, I don't happen to think that people without those relationships or without siblings are "doomed to a life of emptiness".  Of course they aren't.  I do believe, though, that there are some very valuable and meaningful relationships they do miss and therefore miss out on at least the type of enrichment that comes from those relationships.  Best way to describe it, I guess:  We all can't experience everything in life, but we can live fulfilled and happy lives even when we miss out on some types of enrichment that only some experiences can provide.

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   duffsmomposted 11 years ago

   I hesitate to speak for all families, as each situation is different. For me, I was the only child of older parents and tremendously lonely. They died when I was young and I had the chance to live with my aunt and uncle who had one son older than me, and one younger. So I got the chance to have "brothers" and it was great.
   
   So for me I would have been happier with siblings. My two children are very different but are close now - but when they were kids they fought like cats and dogs regardless of consequences. That was a shock to me as an only child that siblings fight constantly.

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      Billie Kelpinposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      D, I agree with the loneliness factor. I still remember a Sunday. afternoon when I was 7.  My mom and dad sent me outside with my doll buggy. I walked up and down the quiet street and thought to myself, "Oh, THIS is what the word "lonely" means.

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   2. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I was NEVER lonely as an only child.  In fact, I felt my immediate environment was crowded.  I had friends, relatives, and a slew of cousins always visiting me and spending the night.  Only DOES NOT mean LONELY.  I NEVER WISHED for a sibling-NEVER!

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   Ciel Clarkposted 11 years ago

   I think children who grow up with siblings tend to eat a lot faster.  I don't have any brothers or sisters and I am a very slow eater and am still (decades later) surprised when I look for seconds and everyone else has finished. 
   
   I have heard from almost all my friends with sibs that they are best friends after they are not living together, and yes, would love to have a sister. Or brother.

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Children w/o siblings are freer to develop into their own persons.They don't have to conform to a sibling construct which is commonplace in multichild households.They aren't subjected to gamesmanshp nor favoritism which effects a child's self-esteem.

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6. 84

   gmwilliamsposted 11 years ago

   There is a BELIEF that siblings=happiness in children's lives.Such is NOT necessarily the case. Siblingship has both its positives & negatives& is NOT always a factor regarding a child's happiness. read more

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I wrote this hub as a response to the question. Read and comment.

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7. 61

   Angela Kaneposted 11 years ago

   Yes I do believe children who have siblings are happier. They have people to play and talk to at home besides their parents or friends. It is a great and fun to be the only child, but life would so much more bearable with sisters and brothers.

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8. 68

   larakernposted 11 years ago

   I feel like children that have siblings have someone to look after or up to. Siblings provide a way for children to bond with other children on a different level. Personally, I'm an only child and I always wanted a sibling to share my ideas or feelings with.

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Not necessarily the case.  Friends LOOK after each other and so do cousins.  I had friends and cousins look after me and I them. There are siblings who would not hesitate to thrown another sibling under the bridge.  GET REAL here!

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