What parenting style were you raised under and what were the effects?

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   jansharesposted 11 years ago

   What parenting style were you raised under and what were the effects?
   
   Authoritative - balanced in nuturing, limit-setting, and boundaries; warm and verbally engaging.
   
   Authoritarian - strict rules and limit-setting, high expectations, cold.
   
   Indulgent - lenient, overly involved and nurturing, no rules or boundaries.
   
   Neglectful - uninvolved, emotionally absent, no rules, boundaries or expectations.
   
   

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2. 82

   Alphadogg16posted 11 years ago

   Being that my father was in the Military for 35 years before his passing, I was definitely was raised with the Authoritarian style. Strict, disciplinarian, involved in every aspect of my life, school, sports, extra curricular activities, etc.There is no man that I respect/respected more than my father, He made me the man that I am today, and still effects me/my decision making until this day. I'm eternally grateful.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That's a beautiful testament to effective parenting, Alphadogg16. You were blessed, thanks for sharing.

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3. 76

   Thief12posted 11 years ago

   More or less authoritative. My mother raised all four of us alone, and she did her best to establish rules and generate responsibility in us, but there was also a lot of nurturing and communication. I'm not saying she was perfect, but I suppose I can say she did pretty well, all things considered. I'm the youngest of the four, in my 30s now, and all of us have turned out pretty well. We are all hardworking men, with families, and we enjoy whatever few moments we have together.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That's wonderful, Thief12, kudos to your mom. Thanks for sharing.

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   duffsmomposted 11 years ago

   For the first 8 years both of my parents were alcoholics and I was alone a lot once they "fell asleep" from drinking. I wouldn't say there was much discipline or need for it really. I felt like I was the adult. That all changed when my father died when I was 8 and it was just me and my mom. Mu mom was pretty lenient to the point of my being spoiled. She died when I was 15 and I moved in with my aunt and uncle...that is a whole different story.
   
   They had rules and I felt they were largely emotionally absent but that might just be my "teenage" take on it.  They set rules but I don't recall them being overly involved or encouraging...just here are the rules - follow them or be grounded.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Seems a combo of at least three, duffsmom. Thanks so much for your openness to share.

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   moonfairyposted 11 years ago

   It was Authoritarian...very strict rules and limits, very high expectations and somewhat cold. I had a lot of responsibilities and was expected to perform them perfectly and if I didn't, there was hell to pay....
   there was love and there was some nurturing and some really wonderful times, but for the most part I was terrified to do wrong. I constantly had to prove myself.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you so much, moonfairy, for sharing.

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   Krista Schneeposted 11 years ago

   I was brought up by a father who was ex-military and a mother who had some mental health issues (unknown to us at the time). Both parents were very strict, but this taught me the value of honor, personal responsibility, strong work ethic, and timeliness. I suppose there was some fear of failure, but much of that I believe came from my mother's often erratic behavior. Despite everything, I lived in a loving family who looked out for each other first, with the devotion to family above everything.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Good to hear this, Krista. Thank you for sharing.

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   Felisa Daskeoposted 11 years ago

   I was raised in a conservative family with a strict mother and an understanding father.  My mother died when I was still 15 and my father gave us all the freedom that we wanted.  He had no rules but we obeyed and respected him.  So I grew up doing my best but not striving too much.  My father was there anyway and my elder siblings.  But then, I would have wanted my father to be more stricter.  Anyway, I grew up with love in the family.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Felisa, thank you so much for sharing your story.

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   Man of Strengthposted 11 years ago

   Hi Jan
   My mom was authoritative and my father was authoritarian. As a kid, I thought they were both nuts. My mom didn't spare the rod and she was tough verbally as well. She was also very warm, funny, and loving. My dad was always about perfection. He seemed to accentuate the negative more than the positive. At times I felt I could never do anything right. At the same time he could be a great motivator. As an adult, I appreciate both of them and how they did their best to mold me into the man I am today.

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Man of Strength. I appreciate your sharing, the humor and love are expressed well.

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   DDEposted 11 years ago

   My parents were Authoritative - balanced in nuturing, limit-setting, and boundaries; warm and verbally engaging. Authoritarian - strict rules and limit-setting, high expectations, cold.  and being hte older of five children had many responsibilities

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      jansharesposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks, DDE. Sounds balanced.

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