A Toronto couple have decided to keep the gender of their baby secret. Does anybody else think this is a bad idea?
You mean forever? or just before birth?
The parents don't say specifically how long only that “We've decided not to share Storm's sex for now"
The parents don't say specifically how long, only that they have decided not to share Storm's (the child is named Storm) sex for now.
I don't get it. Are they famous? Why would this be in the news?
Who are they hiding the gender from? It will make no difference to the baby, she/he won't understand anyway.
Giving a baby the name Storm could be a bigger issue..
At first glance, I thought this was completely foolish. It shouldn't make a difference to the child, with regards to their gender. Why keep it a secret and the reasons for doing so, that I read from the article is ignorant.
But, that's just me.
Personally, I think the parents are just media whores drawing attention to themselves and it will just be harmful to the child. I can just imagine the paparazzi stalking this family. Life is tough enough without having to try to figure out if you want to be a boy or a girl? Go with what you're born with and if you don't like it change it, but why keep it a secret and at what age exactly are they going to let little Storm decide if it wants to be a boy or a girl? And aren't they just making another decision for this child who has no say in the matter what so ever? All I can see is trouble for this child and publicity for the parents. Potty training should be interesting, I guess it will just do it all sitting down. When they talk about the child, are they just going to call it, it? Look at what little Storm made in school today, it's such a talented artist. That's enough to make me run away from home. Makes me think of the balloon boy.
It doesn't bother me particularly. I think a lot of people try to shove kids into strict gender roles much too early and this is a way (albeit an unusual one) of delaying that process a bit. Very few adults are 100% girly girls or 100% manly men, so why do so many people behave as if children should be?
For example, now that my daughter is 4, I let her chose her own clothes (most of the time) and she loves dresses and skirts, especially pink ones. But she also loves dinosaurs and pirates and other things typically regarded as "boy stuff" and I see no reason in the world why those preferences should be regarded as any less valid than pink dresses! I think kids - both boys and girls - should have the opportunity to explore a mix of "boy" and "girl" stuff so they develop broad interests and skill sets from an early age.
Hey Kerry, what you're talking about in your second paragraph is something completely different than what these people are doing.
It makes no sense to keep hidden the child's gender. The child is either a girl or a boy. This is done by biology/anatomy.
I am of the understanding that these people are clueless and the only reason for doing such a thing to a child would be for their own benefit, not the child.
Do you have kids yourself? Sorry, I can't remember.
Imho, the wisdom or foolishness of their decision will depend a bit on how long they keep it up, but for an infant or toddler, it sort of makes sense to me. If they announce which sex it is, people will immediately start giving it pink dresses and dolls if it's a girl and blue overalls and trucks if it's a boy. (If you're not a parent, you'll have to trust me on this. For girls especially, the barrage of pinkpinkpink starts literally from day one.) If they don't know, they'll make more gender neutral choices for their gifts, such as green or yellow clothes and teddy bears and blocks for toys. The baby will get a much better and more versatile mix of clothing and toys this way.
What you say is very true. The baby will have a lot of green and yellow outfits and non-gender specific toys.
I put down my foot when I was pregnant with my daughter and banned pink. I got a few pink things but because of that, I got a whole range of colors, which I thought was great.
ahh but it goes so far beyond the colors - its the way people talk to a baby girl - all gooshy and stuff but with a boy they're all gruff and it is only the beginning - little ones get all these gender cues and then it does create a certain stress level - for instance, recently I saw a one year old boy, not yet walking, take a plastic water bottle and crawl along with it pretending it was a truck! He had picked up the gender cues and was playing the baby boy role to the hilt. I cannot believe it is ingrained. His dad was so proud! but what if he had not wanted to play trucks and act the boy?
They're so lovable and will do anything to please us - they know what we want - but what are we and they missing when we force them to specialize as babies. because that's what we do.
that's so COOL! Anyway, the only reason we need to have a gender is so we'll know which bathroom to use . . . hmmmm they'll have to decide which one before the poor kid goes to school! this is a super test of the system - drive those beurocrats (sp?) crrrazy!
yeah, and see, I keep my own online gender hidden (see my avatar) so people won't stereotype me. not true, but I wish I could.
What if, though, when people come to visit they aren't classifying your little one as girl (therefore, dolls, kitchen stuff, etc. and the girly stuff) or boy (therefore, trucks, baseballs, footballs and the boy stuff)? Then the child gets to follow their own interests and without any pressure to behave like one or the other. What we expect from boys vs. girls is incredibly different and prejudicial. I know it seems crazy, but I completely understand their intentions and wish them luck, because people are so attached to their own identity as either man or woman that they get absolutely nuts when someone challenges those ideas by being lgb or "other" - its very interesting, I don't think we should condemn them for doing this.
My first thought when I seen the article was that maybe the child was one of those kids that is of both genders. I forgot what it is called....hermiphridite or something along those lines. That was the only reasoning why I thought they may have hid it.
The article said this was not the case.
I don't know why this was a semi-major news story.
Yes, people tend to over-pink the girls and over-truck the boys, but I have personally seen that boy and girl preferences tend to go toward the stereotype naturally. Is it imposed? or genetic?
As a child I was a petite, shy blonde. For toys, personally liked cowboy cap guns and rubber knives and was not much into dolls, but I grew up to love being a mom. I had two boys who liked boy stuff-- which I understood.
The biggest mistake this couple may be making, is making this into big news.
I agree. If they don't want to raise the child in a gender specific way, that is their business, but to go public and make a big fuss that gets everybody guessing kind of defeats the purpose. But somebody knows the baby's gender. I wonder how much money it will take to break their silence.
I think that there is a problem with the baby,the baby probably have both, so the parent is afraid to decided if to put in him/her in blue/pink. plus they are sick parent in the head looking for attention...http://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=utf-8&fr=slv8-msgr&p=children%20born%20with%20both%20gender&type=
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