Free Range Parents

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   gmwilliamsposted 12 years ago

   Studies show that children raised by free range parents are allowed to explore their environment more and mature earlier than children raised by overintrusive parents.    Do you believe that what American society needs are more free range parents?  Why?  Why not?

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      Dave Mathewsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      What the heck is a "Free range parent"? If you are referring to a child being free to do as it pleases regardless of any boundries, these are just lazy parents who could care less what their kid does so long as the kid is out of their hair. that is total laziness and irresponsibility on behalf of the parent, as a matter of fact they are not parents even.

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         tobey100posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Kinda like free range chickens with less feathers.  http://tobey100.hubpages.com/hub/My-Dads-a-Helicopter

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      brittanytoddposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I think that there should be a middle ground between the helicopter parents and free range ones.  I did a study on youth that were at-risk and put into residential institutions (i.e. wilderness programs, boarding schools, etc.) and found that many of the children with problems had one of the two extremes: A hovering parent or parents that let their kids do whatever they wanted.  Either of the two are not effective methods for parenting.  I found that kids with supportive, loving and protective parents were not at-risk.  Kids need to know that their parent's care in order to avoid getting into unsafe and troubling situations.

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         Xenonlitposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         

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         tobey100posted 12 years agoin reply to this

         I'd have to amen brittany on this one.

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         Daniel Carterposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Completely agree.

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            brittanytoddposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Thank you all.

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      Hollie Thomasposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I have no idea what you mean by free range parents, however, I'm thinking of Piagetian school of thought. I don't believe that  children should learn a particular topic at a particular time. Far more healthy to allow children to explore their world, ask questions and for parents to be as honest as possible and explain life the way it is, at the level of understanding of the child. We need to protect children, however, we also need to encourage some independence and independence of thought. This is our aim when we raise them, that they will eventually become rational, independent human beings.

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   livelongerposted 12 years ago

   From what I understand, free range parents are not neglectful, but they are those who have raised their children in a way that enables them to explore more and undertake independent steps earlier and more often than kids raised in an increasingly protective environment.
   
   There is a writer, Lenore Skenazy, who has written a book and who maintains a blog on how this can be done effectively. It does not mean abandoning any attention over your child.

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      TheMagicianposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I'm one of these kids who was raised this way (I'm 18). I can definitely say I was able to mature a lot faster, and I learned about the world quicker as well. My mother (only parent) was more of my best friend and occasional guide when I needed one, and not so much a "parent", though she definitely was when she needed to be one. Best mom ever

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   Daniel Carterposted 12 years ago

   I think different personalities need different kinds of things. "Free range" may be good from some, not so good for others. Teaching kids and equipping them with knowledge based on fact will give them power to govern their own lives instead of  learning to depend on parents for everything, which, by the way, will only cause codependence and bitter resentment.
   
   Not that I was such a good parent, but I did manage to teach my kids a few good things. For example, I would often ask them if they were sure they wanted me to solve their problem for them, or would it be better for them to solve it. Because I could always bet that if I solved it for them, they wouldn't like the outcome nearly as much.

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   stclairjackposted 12 years ago

   i cant help myself,... i know i'm gona get slammed for this,... but i cant help it,....
   
   why must we waste soo much of our valuable energy labeling different parenting styles?
   
   i hate to sound so crass,.... but realy,.... theres a billion dollar industry of parenting help out there because sudenly we've forgten in the last 50 years what humans managed to do for the last few thousand years,.. and despite what scholars and therapists would have us believe,... humans have done a reasonably good job of it i'd say,....
   
   here we are today,.... using this thing called the internet,....to debate parenting of all things,... its the intlectual equivelant to alexander grahm bell invetning the telephone,.... so some idget can debte how best to fart,... because he forgot how.
   
   some where in a past time there is a mom looking into a portal to the future,.... seeing this,... and shaking her head. she might call to her husband and point to the rediculous picture in the portal,... and he too will shake head in dissbelief,.... "these people got a man to the moon but they cant get a todler out of diapers?"
   
   sorry,... my bad,... but it had to be said.

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      samanthamayerposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Labeling parenting styles and parenting help are different things. You can't try and attack both as a single argument. So for your second point - I disagree. We are far more advanced and civilized than we have ever been. Social media has merely highlighted issues in society. In terms of parenting help, parents no longer have to feel isolated necessarily when they have concerns about certain aspects of raising their child/ren. They can reach out for help, or simply advice. Furthermore, there were good parents in the past and there are good parents today, sure. But there have also been bad parents and there will continue to be more in the future. There's no blanket label for all parents.
      
      Finally, I would question the comparisons of parenting to farting and as simply a job entailing changing diapers.

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         Daniel Carterposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Far more advanced and civilized about some things, and still far less civilized in other areas.
         
         Human nature is pretty consistent throughout the ages. When push comes to shove, we are still very petty, grudge-holding beings, still flawed, still perpetuating the same illnesses and dysfunctions. Headlines are a pretty good indication of that.
         
         However, not to completely disagree with your point, there are several areas where we have actually improved rather than regressed. There's optimism in that idea for me.

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            samanthamayerposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            That's true. I suppose I should have made that more clear - I don't think we are perfect at the moment, just improved in ways. I do see your point, however, that some flaws in society and in human nature haven't changed much.

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      greatparentingposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I think we're still labeling and debating parenting styles because we see so many kids in need of help. Although other hubbers point out that we've been parenting for thousands of years, that doesn't mean it's easy. The world has changed in those years and the challenges for parents today are different than in the year 1. It's not easy being a parent and I don't think it's bad that some folks seek advice.

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         stclairjackposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         perhaps my mean spirted sense of humor over road my intent, ha!,... let me try again,...
         
         i love the fact that parents wishing to seek help or advice have avenues for that,.... and in that respect the modern world has enriched us as parents far beyond our wildest dreams.
         
         what concerns me is,..
         
         lables in parenting styles, lables in personalities,.... they all seem to have the effect of boxing us in,...and can enable harsh judgement from those who may not understand or be familiar,.... or worse yet,.... bring harsh and often rash incorrect judgements from one who has read 3 wikipedia artcles, and thier mother beat them,... therefor,.... they are a self proclaimed expert.
         
         they conduct themselves as experts, and throw out the vocabulary of the expert,... (easily seen through by those who would not be fooled),... they dish out horible self agrandizing advice, based on rudemntary knowledge and personal baggage.
         
         individality has been the rally for the last 70 years or so,.... but we'v labled it out of existance,.... in the classroom, in the home, in the work place,... in the community,.... you must be labled.
         
         i guess its just  personal thing with me.
         
         and yes,i bing my personal experience to bear wen advising others, but i'm honest about it, and i never try to come off as more than i am.
         
         my apologies,... i'm sure i rambled

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            stclairjackposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            oops,.... forgot a though,.... (god forbid any of us should have a unpublished or posted thought! ha!)
            
            also,.... the culture of the therapist for the last 70 plus years has caused us to question every move we make now,.... "what would dr phill do?"... and if we dont question our intuition,... then others will be more than happy to do it for us,... all the questioners validated by the next book, the next talk show, the next "protect the kids" law written by a self promoting pilitician,... vaidated further by the social worker who follows up in the abuse call,..... or doesnt,.... depending on thier work load.
            
            yup,.... that was a rambling rant.
            
            sorry

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   Mighty Momposted 12 years ago

   Three kids all raised in the same house by the same parents, whose parenting style did not vary. Of course there are environmental variables like birth order, etc. But basic parenting style is consistent across all three kids.
   Yet there are vast differences in each child's approach to life and ultimate success.
   
   Parents have natural parenting styles. But they can learn/adopt other approaches that are actually more effective based on their CHILD's personality.
   It's not just helicopter vs. free range parents. Kids have their own "styles" that need to be addressed and compensated for. Some kids do better with more hands-on, directing parents. Others truly thrive with less structure/authority.

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      Daniel Carterposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Where's the "like" button? Not surprised that I agree with you, MM.

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   shea duaneposted 12 years ago

   Your question assumes that all children respond to their environment in exactly the same way, that children are not unique.

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   Disturbiaposted 12 years ago

   Helicopter vs. free range parents, parenting "styles" ... holy cow, no wonder it's so tough being a kid these days.

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8. 67

   Alecia Murphyposted 12 years ago

   I agree with Disturbia, there's no reason for a style. When I think of my grandparents, they raised my parents the same way with love, discipline, respect, and integrity. Of course they didn't have the same tools my parents had, but my parents took what they did and raised me well. Of course, I'm an only child so things turn out differently than with people from larger families. However, I think as long as parents try to give their children a good start in life, there's not much else to ask for. What the children do with it after growing up, is there business.

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   Home Girlposted 12 years ago

   Kids should be controlled but they never should feel like being controlled. That's what wise parents do. Free range chicken can be eaten by a fox. Free range children can get into a big trouble with life later.

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