How to deal with a neighbor in this case? Any advice?

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  1. ReuVera profile image81
    ReuVeraposted 13 years ago

    I am a very peaceful person. I prefer to lose, but to avoid any war or argument. I am a very calm and easy to deal with neighbor. I never had any problems.
    My neighbors from the East had two big dogs which were attacking my dog on my property. To solve this problem I just put a dividing light chicken wire fence, which is allowed in our town. Now my neighbors were doing some yard work in their back yard and they took part of my fence off, without even asking me. I understand, the fence was on their way and I didn’t make an issue from this. I just expressed my hope to the lady neighbor that after they are done with their yard improvement project they would assemble my fence back.  She agreed that they would do this. Now their yard work is done and it is past a week already, but it doesn’t seem that they are going to fix my fence that they disassembled. I don’t think that it will help much if I ask them again. They are a type of arrogant and rude people with whom negotiation won’t really work.
    Any advice on what I can do without getting into arguments?

    1. NathanSyckel profile image61
      NathanSyckelposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Flip them the bird and put your fence back up. Make sure it's on your property line and if they take it down call the cops. Not sure that it will do anything but it will let them know that you mean business.

      1. NathanSyckel profile image61
        NathanSyckelposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        And if that doesn't work...hire a dog assassin. tongue

        1. ReuVera profile image81
          ReuVeraposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Sadly, the most aggressive dog was killed, it jumped off the running truck and got killed. Another dog is less intrusive. The point is about making my neighbors know their responsibility for their actions.

      2. ReuVera profile image81
        ReuVeraposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        It is no problem to put the fence back by myself, it is more of making a point. If I swallow this and put the fence back myself, the neighbors will get an idea that they can wipe their feet on me.

    2. Uninvited Writer profile image79
      Uninvited Writerposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Call animal control?

  2. Greek One profile image63
    Greek Oneposted 13 years ago

    sleep with the wife.. that will get the man upset

    and when you do, don't be very good in bed.. that will make his wife upset

    1. ReuVera profile image81
      ReuVeraposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Good advice.... the problem is that I am a Woman, haha. And for no sweets in the world I'll sleep with the man-neighbor, he is so yaki in his looks, that it will make anyone vomit.

  3. LeanMan profile image79
    LeanManposted 13 years ago

    Let your dog do his business in their yard every time and they will soon put the fence back... failing that, you do your business in their yard until they put the fence back...

  4. Origin profile image59
    Originposted 13 years ago

    Can you install a thick fence? Like heavy wood, or brick? They do that again you can sue for damages. big_smile

  5. Lisa HW profile image61
    Lisa HWposted 13 years ago

    I think I'd give them the benefit of the doubt that, maybe, they've had a busy week and have plans to do it (maybe on the long Memorial Day weekend?).  I think I might ask her (without coming across as anything but "just wondering") if she were "still planning to do it" or "should I just put it up".  I'd go with something like, "Hi, Susie.  Either way, this isn't a big problem, but I was wondering....".  If I didn't get the feeling the fence was going up soon I'd just put it back myself.

    I'm not second-guessing your assessment that they're rude and arrogant, but there's at least the chance they're not as rude and arrogant as they seem.  I'm from the East, and maybe people do tend to be more reserved and have an accent that sounds more arrogant than something "friendlier sounding", like a Southern accent.  Either way, I wouldn't automatically assume the fence issue has to turn into an argument if you don't assume it has to, and if you decide not to let it get it far by politely "exiting" if it seems to head in that direction.

    1. Misha profile image63
      Mishaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Knowing RueVera a bit, I would bet she meant Middle East or even Asian. Or may be just a geographical position of the neighbors' house in relation to her own. smile

      1. rebekahELLE profile image84
        rebekahELLEposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        I wondered too about this.

        I think Lisa said it best, just a friendly approach, asking about the fence. maybe comment on how nice their yard looks first. big_smile

      2. ReuVera profile image81
        ReuVeraposted 13 years agoin reply to this

        "Or may be just a geographical position of the neighbors' house in relation to her own."

        Misha, this guess was correct. Sorry, I didn't specify. Sometimes we think that if we know what we mean, then everyone should understand.
        My neighbors from the West (geographically in relation to my house) also have two dogs and their dogs and my dog exchange their waste products, fertilizing both yards. It's not a problem for me.
        As I say it is more of a courtesy issue. Also of fixing another's property that was broken on purpose.
        I tried "cookie" method already, talked to the lady, but the fence is still not on.
        It was the same pattern as a year ago, when their kids were four-wheeling through my gravel drive way in the fall, making a mess of it and then they came to apologize and said that their dad promised to fix it. I told to the kids that they may drive through my drive way (it was giving them more fun to four-wheel wider), but only if their dad was going to fix it in spring. As you may understand, my neighbor never bothered to fix it. Now may be they think if i didn't push it, they don't have to bother about me.
        This is what is not right. I am calm and quiet, but I will not give up here. I mean, I am not going to fix it myself (they broke it, not me).
        Or should I just put another cheek for a slap? LOL.

        1. Misha profile image63
          Mishaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

          Based on what you said, that's exactly what they think. You either have to follow up on both cases, or be prepared to swallow more of that stuff...

  6. luvpassion profile image62
    luvpassionposted 13 years ago

    Many home owners have similar difficulties with neighbors... lisa's solution sounds good.
    A peace offering also could help, home baked cookies, a bottle of wine. Ask them over to discuss it rationally.

  7. Origin profile image59
    Originposted 13 years ago

    Take them to small claims court. I'm not sure how much that fence of yours happened to cost, but it may make a point to them that they can't do this to someone's property. Also, if you do go be sure to have pictures of before and after the damage. smile

  8. rebekahELLE profile image84
    rebekahELLEposted 13 years ago

    yes, if they took it down and said they would put it back up, I would remind them. it was really rude of them not to ask you first.

  9. ReuVera profile image81
    ReuVeraposted 13 years ago

    Yep, I am afraid you are right, Misha. And I don't want to swallow more of this stuff. I'll wait couple of days more and act officially. As I found out, other people from the neighborhood called police on these guys before too for different reasons. I'll take them to small claims court, just to make a point. I hope nobody will blame me that my response to my neighbors' act was inadequate.

  10. profile image0
    Tilecleaninghubposted 13 years ago

    You are totally out of whack with reality.  Problem is not the fence.  Problem is the neighbors dogs.  No fence is needed.  If dog goes into your propertly immediately call police.  If dog attacks your dog call police.  Wow this is crazy.  Next dog is going to attack you or a kid on your propertly and your concerned about some stupid chicken fence.

  11. alternate poet profile image68
    alternate poetposted 13 years ago

    I would suggest installing three carefully positioned automatic fast acting machine gun positions with laser trip firing. twenty or thirty anti personnel mines in a carefully devised pattern leaving a path that only you know - then put out yummy doggy stuff to tempt your neighbors dog over.  Or wait a while and if they don't put the fence back up do it yourself with a smile on your face.

  12. ReuVera profile image81
    ReuVeraposted 13 years ago

    Surprisingly, it resolved! My son came over and he went to talk to the neighbor (the male neighbor). "A man to a man talk" made it! The fence is back and the neighbor's dog is not happy. It runs barking in our direction and stops (breaks, like in cartoons, fun to watch) almost hitting the fence. Every time, after time. What a stupid dog, it even doesn't get used that there is a fence there, dah....

    Thanks everyone for advices. Some of them were very constructive smile

  13. JulesGerome profile image60
    JulesGeromeposted 13 years ago

    Dogs always copy their masters. If they act stupid, the dog will do as well.LOL

 
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