teenagers and sex

1. 57

   TuesdayNeverComesposted 13 years ago

   I was in my boyfriends little sisters room getting tampons when i found condoms in her drawer... She's also told her parents that she isn't having sex with her boyfriend (19). She's 16, and I know that she has condoms... but that doesn't mean she's using them. Should I talk to her mother about it, so her mom can get her another form of birth control?

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   1. 61

      KayeKeatleyposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      No.  It's not your place to talk to her mother.  It's your boyfriends sisters place to do that.  In fact, it's not really your business at all and it would probably do nothing more than alienate the relationship between you and the sister, the brother and the sister and the mother and her daughter.
      I might be sounding rash, but I'm a mother of a 16 year old daughter.  And yes my daughter and boyfriend do have sex.  I found out by "accident" that they were having sex and for a long time we couldn't get past it...  So, unless you would want the same information being given to your own mother I would say stay out of it, it doesn't concern you.

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   2. 67

      Pearldiverposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Why Don't you talk to her mum about helping her to put a lock on her drawers to keep the Snoops out of them

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         Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I think she should get a lock put on both of her drawers

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         1. 67

            Pearldiverposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Exracturally

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2. 0

   Precious Williamsposted 13 years ago

   I hate to be blunt - The answer to your question is an emphatic no - because it is none of your business and she is not your sister.  Also condoms are a much better form of contraception than the pill - no DVT (Deep Vein Thrombosis) - no STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) and if used properly only a minute chance of having an unwanted pregnancy.

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   1. 57

      TuesdayNeverComesposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      i was thinking more along the lines of unwanted pregnancy, because granted, she may have the condoms, but it doesn't mean she's using them.

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         Precious Williamsposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         But Tuesday - by the same reasoning you don't know that she isn't using them. You cannot live her life for her.  You could cause all sorts of problems by interfering and I can assure you, you wouldn't be thanked for it. Put it to the back of your mind and leave well alone.

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      2. 61

         jeff3600posted 13 years agoin reply to this

         if you really want to do something, try to talk to the sister directly. she will feel like you stabbed her in the back and she cant trust you if you go to her mom. would u want some body to do that to you? ik i wouldnt. you could give her more information about sex, and just make sure she is informed, and let her know if she ever has any questions, or needs advice, or more info that she can come to you with out you getting all judge mental.

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3. 85

   KCC Big Countryposted 13 years ago

   I wouldn't talk to the mother.  If you feel you MUST say something, then why not talk to the girl yourself?
   
   Before you do anything, ask yourself how you'd feel if the roles were reversed.  Would you appreciate the unsolicited advice?

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4. 63

   Lisa HWposted 13 years ago

   She's not "little".  She's 16.  If she doesn't want a pregnancy she knows how not to let it happen.  If she does (and that may be the reason so many kids have babies anyway) there'll be no stopping her.  Besides, she's not your business and not your kid.  You must have your own matters to spend your time thinking about.

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5. 0

   ralwusposted 13 years ago

   it's onion bunizz

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6. 57

   Studio Eposted 13 years ago

   Don't listen to these fools, TELL. thats whats wrong with this generation of so called grown ups to afraid to be an adult just let the kids of the world run amok and become dumb adults that end up on jerry springer talking about how their 13yr old daughter beat her up and cuss her out, she sitting up there crying like a big child instead of being the mother. i say TELL or you'll see more of your not the daddy maury povich type shows poping up. no more backbone in this country everybodys touchy touchy feely feely im your friend not your parent mentality so afraid of what someone else will say. stand up and be a man, stand up and be a woman you can't save a child by being silent.
   
   i need a drink.

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7. 91

   akirchnerposted 13 years ago

   I agree - sometimes teens especially feel violated if you go behind their backs and talk 'about them' rather than TO them.  I found a box of condoms in my son's drawer and although this was not the BEST way to handle it, I moved them. 
   
   Why you ask?  Because I knew my son and I knew he would come and talk to me - either mad or laughing - or SOMETHING! It was a rather idiotic way for me to handle it but it worked. 
   
   I learned one very important lesson that day though - I could not stop him from using them; I could not stop him from having sex, and I certainly was NOT prepared for any of it.  But in the long run, I did feel better (after a long while) about talking it out with him and making my feelings known about it and listening to his reasoning - although he told me at first he was keeping them for a friend!
   
   This stuff is all worrisome and it is all 'tough' - but the more we communicate the better we all are in the long run.  We can't always avoid disasters but at least we can try to lessen them?
   
   Good luck!

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8. 78

   Mighty Momposted 13 years ago

   I agree with those who say "NO! Do NOT talk to the mother."
   Others have said you may set of a chain of consequences and will not be thanks for it.
   One which has not been mentioned is technically the boyfriend is committing statutory rape. He is 19 and having sex with an underage girl -- 16.
   Now her parents may be ok with being in denial about what is going on between her daughter and her older boyfriend.
   Or maybe they're not (you haven't said anything about a dad, and dads can be very, very protective of their daughters).
   
   If you feel close to your boyfriend's sister you might want to approach her -- not in an accusatory wa. But just to offer any support she might need.She probably won't take you up on it, tho.

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9. 78

   mega1posted 13 years ago

   teenagers should definitely not have sex at all
   
   
   unless they're really good at it

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10. 78

    Mighty Momposted 13 years ago

    Greek One -- That's a great line and a great solution!

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    1. 62

       Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       I'm here for the children

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11. 78

    mega1posted 13 years ago

    I was very good at when I was a teen - from the get-go
    
    but now I've forgotten everything I ever knew
    
    lack of practice

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       Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       i think that many of the parts have changed over time

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       1. 78

          mega1posted 13 years agoin reply to this

          don't think too much about that - it'll make you very depressed - they say. 

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          1. 62

             Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

             i heard they use robots now

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12. 78

    mega1posted 13 years ago

    robot porno, as well?  um . . .

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       Greek Oneposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       

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13. 78

    mega1posted 13 years ago

    hahaha   guess I shouldn't knock it til I've tried it!

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