I am new to HubsPages.

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   jepstorylineposted 12 years ago

   I am new to HubsPages. Please review my Hub and let me know how I can improve my writing.

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      Randy Godwinposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Welcome to HP.  I am reluctant to give you advice on your first hub at this time Jep, but I'm sure others will give you some good advice.  Welcome to HubPages. 

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      kschangposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      The Teddy Bear one is way too short. I'm sure you can find a dozen more interesting factoids about teddy bears. Like... WHY did they named it Teddy's Bear? WHY did Americans love it? Was it spread by a newspaper or something?
      
      The Garlic one is too short as well.
      
      Each capsule should be more than one paragraph. With only one paragraph they look very odd, and reads very short. if they're that short, should they even be in separate capsules?

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      1. 87

         Marisa Wrightposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         I agree the Hubs are far too short.  Hubs are not like blog posts - aim for long, informative articles like the ones you'd like to read in a magazine.  At least 400 words, up to 1,500.
         
         However I don't agree that a capsule needs to be more than one paragraph.  It does no harm unless you want to line it up with a photo or advertising.  Just make sure you delete any blank lines at the end of each capsule, otherwise you'll have huge white spaces between each one and that looks bad.
         
         This Hub is good at explaining how to use capsules:
         
         http://darkside.hubpages.com/hub/capsules

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            kschangposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            Well, there are exceptions to every rule, of course. However, I've always saw capsules as "sections" or "subsections". If you need to use a new heading, then it's a separate capsule. On the other hand, one paragraph section does not really a section make.   it's like an outline where every sentence is a bullet point. It doesn't gibe.
            
            I've used single paragraph text capsules with with no headers/topic to facilitate layout, but that's sort of "advanced technique".

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   paradigmsearchposted 12 years ago

   This is strictly just my own personal opinion!
   
   Write from the heart and ramble at will. The readers love it.

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      jepstorylineposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for your advice.

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   Danette Wattposted 12 years ago

   This is also just a personal opinion -- make your hubs a little longer - they should be at least 400 words. The giant teddy bear clip art was distracting to me. It's good to have information, but try to give all your pieces of info a smooth transition so they just kind of flow, instead of reading as snippets.
   
   Keep writing, read lots of other hubs and check out the learning Center. You'll find the link at the bottom of the website page.

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      jepstorylineposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for your advice. I am working on longer, richer content.

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   leahleflerposted 12 years ago

   Welcome to HP! I looked at your teddy bear and garlic hubs. I would definitely add a bit more text, and move the pictures down a bit to provide room for the ad in the top spot. I would also reduce the size of the teddy bear image - it is extremely large and breaks up the text.
   
   On the teddy bear hub, you could include more on the history of the teddy bear, such as the original cartoon by Clifford Berryman (regarding Theodore Roosevelt's refusal to shoot a captive bear), which inspired the entire industry. You could also include the differences between the German Steiff bears vs. the American Michtom bears of that era. Mentions of famous stuffed bears (Winnie the Pooh, Paddington, etc.) and tie-ins with great Teddy Bear books could provide some amazon capsule ideas if you're interested in using that feature (it really depends on whether you want to write an informative vs. sales type hub).
   
   Good luck!

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   Jonathan Jancoposted 12 years ago

   The garlic hub provides good information, but you would be helped by expanding it quite a bit. Provide a wider array of info and maybe share some of your own experiences in regard to its therapeutic properties. Reading it left me wanting to know more. Offering links to official studies like you have done is helpful, but dont let those links speak for you. Also, anyone who reads your bio and can relate to it will want to know more about you. It may be helpful to provide more of your own persepective on yourself.

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