Do you feel insecure when your partner innocently looks at an attractive lady or

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  1. Lady_E profile image62
    Lady_Eposted 11 years ago

    Do you feel insecure when your partner innocently looks at an attractive lady or guy?

    Anyone attractive is bound to attract attention. It’s natural to look for a few seconds and look away.

    https://usercontent2.hubstatic.com/6563353_f260.jpg

  2. WD Curry 111 profile image57
    WD Curry 111posted 11 years ago

    https://usercontent1.hubstatic.com/6563406_f260.jpg

    Around here . . .  it isn't much of a problem. Who can tell where you are looking? If you practice, you can get away with it every time.

  3. moiponetsoka profile image63
    moiponetsokaposted 11 years ago

    yes i feel like i am not attractive enough and fear that might lose and it will linger in my mind and start comparing myself with the girl he could not stop looking at.

  4. JDove-Miller profile image76
    JDove-Millerposted 11 years ago

    Not at all.  We joke about how he flirts with food service providers in order to get better service and bigger portions.  He comments about women who pass us who have big booties or nice legs.  I either agree or not.  As long as he doesn't follow one home, I'm not worried.

  5. stricktlydating profile image84
    stricktlydatingposted 11 years ago

    No not at all.  He's allowed to look, I don't see any harm in it.  I'm partial to a little 'eye candy' myself.

  6. Disturbia profile image60
    Disturbiaposted 11 years ago

    First off, I don't believe anybody ever "innocently" looks at an attractive anybody else.  If they are looking, it's because they think there is something worth seeing.  And that's perfectly OK with me, because I don't miss a trick when it comes to eye candy.  If I catch my partner looking at an attractive girl, you can bet I probably saw her before he did, and the attractive guy who was with her too.

  7. duffsmom profile image60
    duffsmomposted 11 years ago

    No, it has never bothered me.  I can look at attractive men as well, but it is my husband that I choose to go home with and vice versa.

    1. Ask Ashley profile image68
      Ask Ashleyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Well said!

  8. Ashu Rainen profile image60
    Ashu Rainenposted 11 years ago

    no not at all.....
    cuz its just an opposite sex attraction

    just be positive

    actually in my suggestion you should also join her/him he ll be more comfortable with
    and feel safe with you.

  9. Leaderofmany profile image60
    Leaderofmanyposted 11 years ago

    I don't get jealous that my husband looks at women, which he rarely does. I am very secure in our relationship.

  10. edhan profile image37
    edhanposted 11 years ago

    Nope.

    My wife loves to look at handsome guys while she encourages me to love at beautiful ladies. We are opened about it.

    Looking at attractive guys / ladies are natural. Instead of preventing to see, we encourage each others. There is no harm in it.

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      The eyes are the windows of the soul...please be careful my friend. :0)

  11. profile image0
    BethDWposted 11 years ago

    My partner doesn't really have a wandering eye, so when she does take the time to look at someone I definitely notice...but I don't really dwell on it. We've been together long enough that I trust her completely, and I know she would never be unfaithful.

  12. nightwork4 profile image61
    nightwork4posted 11 years ago

    if anything , i like it. it lets me know she is still alive and thinking.

  13. iwriteforyou profile image58
    iwriteforyouposted 11 years ago

    No I don't. I just remember that physical attraction to a stranger is completely different to what we have as a couple. How does a six pack outweigh years of commitment, support, conversations and shared experiences ?.

    If your partner is happy with you physically and you have  a good quality relationship  I don' think there is anything to worry about.

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Then how do you explain the 60% of married men and women who cheat on their spouses?

  14. Esther Earl profile image57
    Esther Earlposted 11 years ago

    not at all... he sometimes even share to me some things she noticed as well as how pretty or nasty a woman as he've seen it. It's just an appreciation actually like a beautiful flower or a car. What matters is.. you knew who he loves and chooses to spend the rest of his life with.

  15. JSimple profile image61
    JSimpleposted 11 years ago

    No... I am secure with where I stand, in a relationship.  We all look.  just follow the 80/20 rule and you will be ok.

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I am not familiar with the 80/20 rule...please clarify.

  16. Amara783 profile image61
    Amara783posted 11 years ago

    It is perfectly normal for people to look at the opposite sex.  It is better for the relationship if you don't make a big deal about it.  A look is innocent and should be treated as such. You might just learn something about your partner is you are open with the subject.

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      When I was a married man, I noticed attractive women all the time, but I never dwelt on their beauty or thought anything of it.

  17. Sanjida Alam profile image64
    Sanjida Alamposted 11 years ago

    I am a little insecure as I don't find myself that attractive; though my boyfriend has never given me any reason to be so. He is very loyal to me I know, and it is only natural for boys to look at pretty girls. But I've never seen him taking such chances. Even if he did, I think I am capable enough not to judge every little glance. So yeah, it's OK with me as long as he's not cheating in our relationship.

  18. Pamela99 profile image90
    Pamela99posted 11 years ago

    Not at all. My husband has never given me any reason to distrust him and I'm sure he looks at times. He doesn't gawk or make it too obvious. Our relationship is based on trust and a deep friendship also.

  19. dashingclaire profile image68
    dashingclaireposted 11 years ago

    He can look all he wants as long as long as there's no touching.

  20. martin applewhite profile image59
    martin applewhiteposted 11 years ago

    I find it rather hypocritical that the girl can look at this blonde's lovely body and ass,as she is very noticeably undressing her with her eyes,and a filthy good look-over as the photo CLEARLY shows,and wants to prevent a clearly straight ,healthy young man not too admire her,she's not a fat sloath or overweight like atleast 60% of women in that age group,hands off beeatch!
    Pschologist would suggest thatThis is not jealousy,this is a sexually confused young bird.
    Is the bird covering that guys eyes a lesbeing or what,I think  so for show!

    1. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      The one girl isn't even looking at the other one, so I'm not sure what you're going on about here.

      Think you're projecting here....

  21. AbuBackr profile image58
    AbuBackrposted 11 years ago

    yah, i am jealous when my girlfriend look some handsome guy..........

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      At least you're honest. :0)

  22. teethpro profile image57
    teethproposted 11 years ago

    I and my girlfriend often openly talk about it when we see a nice body guy or beautiful and sexy woman. We talk about it as a motivation that we can also get that shape of body. It think it is OK.

  23. cutequotes profile image59
    cutequotesposted 11 years ago

    smile No, it has never bothered me, but the feeling when an attractive lady is near you and your guy is not looking at her and all the attention he has on you makes me feel amazing. But anyway it doesn't bothers me, as you can always find so attractive girls that even I look at them :p

  24. Danieljohnston profile image88
    Danieljohnstonposted 11 years ago

    I would be annoyed if it were a long and lingering look of desire or something.

  25. ackman1465 profile image60
    ackman1465posted 11 years ago

    There's NO WAY to look "innocently" at the hot young babe in the picture attached to this submittal!!!!!......

    1. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      sure there is. look at her as a person, as opposed to a piece of meat

    2. ackman1465 profile image60
      ackman1465posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      OK, Catherine......  I'll give it my best shot....   Mmmmm, not working.....

    3. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I'm sorry ackman- but at least you get style points for trying...

    4. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Catherine: The sexy young thing strutting her stuff in that short black dress doesn't want to be seen as a person...she wants men to notice two luscious legs. She is advertising what she believes is her finest qualities...her finest assets.

    5. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I get that CJ. My point is that there definitely is a way to look at her innocently.
      If you're at a party, and someone comes around w/ a tray of appetizers, you don't have to ogle them wink

    6. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Catherine: This young sexy thang wants to be seen as a sex object...she would be totally disappointed if she was not noticed. Almost all men suffer from "hungry eye syndrom" and this little philly wants them to feast their eyes on her beautiful bod.

    7. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      actually when you talk to them, a lot of them want to "look good" or "look hot" but are very upset when it translates to being looked at as a sex object as opposed to beautiful

      US culture's gotten pretty and sexually available all mixed up

    8. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Catherine: When a woman exposes body parts and wears sexy, revealing clothing, she is trying to draw men in through sexual attraction. What is unrealistic, is to think that once she has them focussed on her body, that they must now focus on her mind.

    9. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      CJ You're not getting it. Girls are taught that dressing sexy means that they're "looking good" for themselves not just that they're trying to attract sex partners, and that dressing modestly is dressing funny or ugly.
      It's not always about sex

    10. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Catherine: I'm sure short skirts, high heels, and thong panties are not meant for one's comfort, but they are meant to get attention using sex as the bait. We are all walking billboards that are advertising something. Women often advertise sexuality.

    11. Catherine Kane profile image83
      Catherine Kaneposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      If you're set on the idea that they're all trying to sexually come on to you, I won't change your mind. Just trying to cue you in to some of the mixed info given to the female side of the group

  26. angied83 profile image68
    angied83posted 11 years ago

    I would deny and say no but I'm just human with some uncontrollable emotions so I would say, yes, it does make me feel insecure sometimes. But I'm learning how to get over it. There will always be more attractive people than me so there's no point in getting insecure or jealous everytime my guy looks at one; it will just turn me into a negative person (which I like to think I'm not). As long as it's just an innocent look of course. ;-)

  27. AM Hanson profile image69
    AM Hansonposted 11 years ago

    i didn't when I had one.  In fact, she would often check out the girls as well smile it was pretty funny, she would scold me a bit if she didn't think the girl was that attractive

  28. am301986 profile image61
    am301986posted 11 years ago

    No, not at all. If you truly loving each other and serious in relationship than insecure feeling never come. On the other hand, seeing an opposite sex is normal and it will not effect a relationship anymore if there is good understanding between them. Be positive, have faith, trust each other and give freedom to each other.

  29. Catherine Kane profile image83
    Catherine Kaneposted 11 years ago

    No. You can admire art without wanting to hang it in your house.

    I would be upset if he ignored me in favor of her. I wouldn't feel insecure though. I know who I am, and that wouldn't be about my worth as a person

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      "You can admire art without wanting to hang it in your house" - classic!!! :0)

      Yeah, who wants to be ignored. That's just downright rude. I even consider cell phone calls and text messaging rude behavior on a date.

  30. networmed profile image58
    networmedposted 11 years ago

    It's not at all, the same for me to her. We even talk about it and make constructive criticism it.

  31. profile image0
    dxnworksposted 11 years ago

    Never.. ever.. a thing of beauty is joy for ever...   smile

    1. profile image0
      CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      As they say, "Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly is to the bone." :0)

  32. profile image0
    CJ Sledgehammerposted 11 years ago

    Not really. It's only when they start to drool, that I begin to take note. :0)

  33. ssuussiiee profile image60
    ssuussiieeposted 11 years ago

    YES it does! I'm terribly jealous, and I absolutely hate it.

  34. yoginijoy profile image66
    yoginijoyposted 11 years ago

    I don't mind if he doesn't mind!  I do believe it is natural for beautiful people to turn heads. The danger arises when one's relationship is not receiving the attention it needs, that's when it can fall apart. It takes more than a look to ruin a long term relationship.

  35. Sphinxs Sanctum profile image60
    Sphinxs Sanctumposted 11 years ago

    I think it might partly depend upon the stage that the relationship has reached.  Where the comfort level is, how much trust has been built & the security or insecurity levels of each party.  If I just start dating someone and am trying to enjoy the time I spend with them, I'm not going to be too happy & in fact, would feel disrespected if he was turning his head for another woman.  After 11 yrs of marriage, I still didn't appreciate too long of a look.  For Goodness Sake - be discreet if you must do it!  A man should always make his lady feel like the most beautiful woman on earth & that goes both ways!  Far too much basic respect has been left out of the modern day relationship, in my opinion.  I think that it's the small things like this over time that can erode the connection between two people.  Take care of one another, show the utmost respect for your partner and you're sure to be paired for a very long time.

 
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