Have you ever jumped to a conclusion before hearing both sides of a story?

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   Mekenzieposted 11 years ago

   Have you ever jumped to a conclusion before hearing both sides of a story?
   
   What did you learn through your experience?  Consider:  Proverbs 18:17  The first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him and Proverbs 18:8 - The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts.

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   joyce31202posted 11 years ago

   Yes, because I thought I knew what the full one was. This has happened when I wanted to be the first one to answer a question. This left me feeling embarrassed. I know now to hear clearly to give quick answers properly. I am learning to take my time before answering or to let some one else answer. Now when I hear gossip I tend to not take sides first of all. I may be in agreement with one side as opposed to the other. I believe that the parties involved in gossip can straighten out their disagreement without my help. If they are  respectful to each other they will be more helpful than harmful. Lastly, I want jump to conclusions, I will not entertain gossip because I don't want to be a part of it. I hate disagreements.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I can totally identify with the 'quick answer' problem.  I too am learning to weigh my words before opening my mouth.   It's great you don't take sides and you are a peacemaker at heart.  Bless you!

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   Ericdierkerposted 11 years ago

   What? It is the only exercise this old fat man gets.  Jumping to conclusions and flying off the handle. I had to give up the 12 oz barbells ;-)
   
   I love your quotations and they are on my board to remind me. "It is OK to jump to a conclusion and judgment as long as you keep it to yourself and keep an open mind".
   
   Otherwise we could not drive a car very well.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Eric, you are cracking me up - love your sense of humor.  May the quotations keep you on the road and safe from harm. 

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   ReneeDC1979posted 11 years ago

   I have done that in the past yes- but now I try to remain the neutral and unbiased party and put myself in the situation from both sides.  Then I make a decision from there.  There are times I ask both parties questions instead of speaking my mind/giving my opinion.  I find that helps them resolve the issue and it doesn't feel like I've taken a side.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Good for you Renee!  It's awesome you ask questions of both sides - that's wisdom!

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   lburmasterposted 11 years ago

   Of course. We always develop a conclusion before we know both sides of the story. It takes a lot of practice to keep your focus on listening to every aspect before developing a conclusion. Took way too much patience.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      lburmaster, I agree we all begin to develop a conclusion while listening to one side.  It does take practice to hold back our thoughts until hearing both sides.  But it's the only way to a true perspective.  Thanks!

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   parrsterposted 11 years ago

   Frequently fail in this department. Though as I age, I'm getting better at recognising the tendency and readjusting my perspective of others words. Possibly goes hand in glove with being empathetic and trusting by nature, I tend to believe what others tell me until given reason not to.
   Having said that, if I am the one offended or hurt by another, I find it easy to give them the benefit of the doubt, to consider things from their perspective before jumping to conclusions; to be non-judgemental.
   Possibly the greater fault is our tendency to speak when we know only our side of the story.  If everyone could learn to reserve comment until they had sought out all angles, others wouldn't have to listen to overhasty comments.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, it's vital to reserve comment until hearing all sides.  It certainly is natural to believe a persons words (I too am trusting) ... but wisdom says to listen to both sides before advising or judging. Thanks for your thoughtful response parrster.

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   d.williamposted 11 years ago

   It is refreshing to see the comments, all of which, do not deny jumping to a premature conclusion without hearing all the facts.  Anyone who denies doing this is obviously lying to themselves.
   We all have preconceived ideas about what is right and what is wrong and base our judgments on those preconceived ideas in just about everything we do in life.
   Quoting from any book to prove a point always negates and diminishes the validity of asking the question in the first place. 
   One would hope that after realizing that one has jumped to an erroneous conclusion a few times,  they would take pause in at least 'voicing' their conclusions for fear of looking like a dolt.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Agreed, honesty is so refreshing.  It has been a process for me in learning not to jump?  I'm sorry you thought quotes diminished the validity - I gave the scripture as reflection.     Yes, making mistakes can be the best teacher. Thanks!

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   Jacqueline4390posted 11 years ago

   When dealing with people, I know that there are two sides to every story. Sometimes it's hard being objective when you have a personal stake in the situation. I try to never jump to any conclusions, but I do have to admit that in my younger years it happened a couple of times. As I have gotten older and experienced more, I tend to slow down and weigh the information.

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Jacqueline,  I think we all jumped to conclusions when we were younger.  As we get older - we should be gaining wisdom and not jump so quickly.  It's hard to be on the receiving end when a friend  jumps to judgements without consulting you.

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   mabelhenryposted 11 years ago

   "For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged" (1 Corinthians 11:31 KJV).
   We probably have all encountered this attitude of jumping to a conclusion without hearing or knowing both sides.
   
   However, judgment of self is encouraged by Scripture, and is the principle we must endeavor to enact in our lives. If I judge myself, and you would judge yourself, we won’t be judged because we choose to examine ourselves.
   
   Jumping to conclusions before hearing both sides can be harmful if you do not have all the facts.
   
   This message or the moral of the story of self-judgment is that, we know and possess within us, all of the particulars and intricacies concerning what we’ve done, or may be doing, and no one else except for God, has the whole story and all the facts, and pieces of each, and every situation. Yet, you and I do, and we have what is necessary to judge ourselves.
   
   I know that I do not have all the information needed to judge anyone else, if I was not present. Even when present, I may not know what motivates the heart or mind, because I am not all-knowing, nor am I everywhere present, and that makes it impossible for me to judge others righteously or rightfully.
   
   Nothing can or will ever make it impossible for God to judge righteously. He has every piece of information, and we do not. Adherence to judging me is the most practical application. Whether someone judges us is neither here, nor there, because ultimately we will be judged by God, and all that we will be able to say is, He is right!
   
   Knowing in part disqualifies us in judging others, but it doesn’t disqualify us in judging ourselves, because we have or hold all the facts in our memories, we know when our motives are not right, and we are admonished and exhorted to judge ourselves. Have you ever had someone tell you a story about someone, and all that supposedly happened in a circumstance? There a judgment call is commissioned from you, which asks you, what are your thoughts regarding this situation? In light of the Scriptures, I would have to, and would want to decline from giving a response, because I don’t have all the facts; just he said, that she said. In summation implies and means gossiping and tale-bearing.
   
   Very honest question to ask, this type of questioning is called a defining moment. God bless you. Have a great weekend!

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      Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Awesome! Judge oneself with God (both knowing intricacies!) It's harmful to jump before hearing both sides. We're not all-knowing or everywhere present-makes it impossible to judge others. Knowing in part disqualifies us; decline response. Bless YOU!

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    Etherealenigmaposted 11 years ago

    Yes, which is why I try to avoid gossip. It is hard however, when you are the new person in an office, and the person you work with regularly is thinking that they are helping you out by preparing you via gossip, for every person working there that you are likely to encounter. In such a case, it's sometimes hard to be clear on whether its just gossip, or if the person is really trying to help you steer clear of trouble or problematic people.

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       Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       I know what you mean, It is hard to discern motives when you are the new kid on the block.  Time will tell and withholding responses is the best.  May God grant wisdom (knowing when to back away, speak up, be silent) in your new position. Thanks!

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    duffsmomposted 11 years ago

    I have done that way too many times, although usually I keep it to myself until I hear both sides.  But internally, I do tend to jump to conclusions and often am proven wrong by further investigation.

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       Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       duffsmom,  your honesty is sweet and refreshing.  I think most of us have jumped way too many times only to find we were wrong.  Hopefully, through failure, we learn to withhold our impulsive response and weigh every side before judging anyone.

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    The Stages Of MEposted 11 years ago

    Oh my YES, but how I wish my human flesh would await the revealed knowledge that always comes when I seek Him first.  Just today I felt a pang of doubt in reaction to a story told.  I prayed to be the voice and messenger of conviction through God's word.  I am often successful when I take time to stop and prayerfully consider how to deflect negative talk and or gossip.  Not that I myself have not fallen victim to the pull of Satan in this arena.  I however, am a child of God, therefore I have been convicted quickly and regularly as to the consequence of such sin.  It is a spiritual battle, in any given circumstance, to not give in or react to the human attack.  It is continuous battle, in that Satan is dutifully seeking to separate us from God.  Due to this very fact the battle remains constnat.  I propose to continue to do my best to see Christ in all circumstance, therefore, only one side remains.  That is the side of God's purpose.  FInding that purpose usually takes time, composure and prayerful consideration.  Most importantly God's word is where we find the side of purpose in Him. Tomorrow I will continue this battle and I pray many join me and support me as warriors in God's Army.  Blessings

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       Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Agree - Seek Him first is key.  This is good: "Stop and prayerfully consider how to deflect negative talk and or gossip."  It is a spiritual battle for those seeking to live godly.  Profound: "only one side remains - God's purpose."  Thanks dearone

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    Motown2Chitownposted 11 years ago

    More times than I can count.  I find that as I get older, and hopefully wiser, I often reserve judgment or choose to forego it completely, especially if the situation does not personally affect me.  I think it's best to generally keep my own counsel about things that concern my own life and my own family.  That being said, it's wise as well to let others keep theirs without feeling somehow compelled to jump to conclusions that may be erroneous and then assert myself in a situation in which I ultimately have no stake.
    
    Great question, by the way.  Thank you!

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       Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       Honesty again .. ahhhh love it!  Seems to be the consensus that age and learning from our mistakes is the best teacher.  Keeping out of a situation that doesn't concern us is wisdom.  Thanks for chiming in with great insight!

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    teaches12345posted 11 years ago

    Yes, I have been guilty of this action.  I try to listen well before responding and not think ahead to what my response might be to their sharing.  It takes practice to listen with an open mind. I have found that people are appreciative of someone who takes time to really think about what they will say in return.  And, we seem to be better communicators when we practice the art of listening.  Blessings.

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       Mekenzieposted 11 years agoin reply to this

       hi teaches, I think we have all been guilty of jumping to conclusions.  It is good that you are aware and try to listen before speaking.  It does take practice.  Thanks for sharing your wisdom.   Blessings to you as well!

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