How do you bring passion back into a 30-year marriage?

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   lisasuniquevoiceposted 8 years ago

   How do you bring passion back into a 30-year marriage?
   
   

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2. 79

   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   The only way it happens is if (both people) want it!
   More often than not that isn't the case. One person has a low libido or an overall lack of interest in romance, passion, or sex. The other person eventually gives up on putting in effort that is not being reciprocated. Sometimes people "fall out of love".
   Eventually they become roommates with the same last name.
   It's easier to maintain a fire than it is to reignite a spark!
   As I stated if (both people) want to put the effort into becoming romantically connected there are tons of help available depending on what they're open to. Initially it starts with having more one on one time, snuggling while watching TV, holding hands while riding in the car or taking a walk. Taking bubble baths or showers together, cooking meals together, having date nights, getaways/vacations, and so forth. There are also adult stores and therapy available too.
   However if only one person believes there is a "problem" they may have to decide whether or not it's a "deal breaker" if things don't change. People only "change" when (they) are unhappy.
   There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them as (is) or move on.
   The choice is up to us!
   Hopefully (both people) want to keep the magic alive!

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   thranaxposted 8 years ago

   Don't get old in the first place.
   
   Kidding.
   
   Its serious that both parties want that. Sometimes you might find your significant other loves you just as much as when you first got married - but their body just doesn't want to put up with it anymore. Its really difficult for everyone but if you watch how a child matures to say a mother you can clearly see people undergo changes. Little boys love and hug and kiss mom, then they early teens and maybe just a kiss or hug now and then, soon they become an adult and mom only gets a hug and kiss when they leave for long times, finally they are young adults in there 20s and mom just kisses them on the forehead sometimes when they leave for weeks at a time. Im sure not everyone is like this but thats generally what happens. Samething happens in a marriage - they don't love you any less but the effort to show it has went down to just kissing etc.
   
   ~thranax~

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   connorjposted 8 years ago

   
   
   Once passion is lost; some change must occur. I truly believe both must change in some way for the benefit of the other. It does not have to be a physical change, it can be just as readily a psychological change or relationship change. I do not mean a change in partner; still the same love mates just a renewed spirit. Here is an example, as a male one may change his hobbies, he may become more protective of his partner by learning how to shoot and defend properly, as the nest empties he may downplay the fatherly side and get back to the lover - protector mentality... Perhaps taking up hobbies together would facilitate?

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      lisasuniquevoiceposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks John. I think I try getting into more hobbies with my husband.
      Lisa

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      connorjposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Give it a go, it will work wonderfully; especially since you are Red Wings fans...

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