What makes homely and plain women be considered the very last resort for men?

1. 85

   gmwilliamsposted 8 years ago

   What makes homely and plain women be considered the very last resort for men?
   
   

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2. 59

   JLauren Angelposted 8 years ago

   Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I think homely and plain women really see themselves as less than, when they should be seeing themselves in a more positive light. When you are homely and plain, people think wow, they really have nothing going for them in looks and attitude. Women who portray a strong confidence are the women who are first picked by men. When you are not able to project a powerful you, then men tend to shy away from people of this nature. Positive thinking is the most empowering emotion, its incredible. Works for wall flowers too.
   Best,
   JLauren

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   1. 85

      gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, but plain/homely women KNOW that they have nothing to offer.  Having confidence is fine but there must be a PHYSICAL COMPONENT in that confidence. Beautiful women know that THEY have IT!

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   2. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you Grace. Both beautiful and homely people look in the mirror and know which group they are in. Confidence and self-esteem only help one to (accept the facts) and keep on keeping on. It's not the end of the world.

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3. 80

   dashingscorpioposted 8 years ago

   
   
   Generally speaking everyone is attracted to beautiful looking people.
   When it comes to dating more often than not (men) are expected to spend their hard earned money on dating activities with women.
   Very few men have a desire to spend their money on women whom they find (unattractive)! Many men have also bought into the idea that their own looks don't matter all that much. "If I become successful enough I can have any woman I want!" That's their belief!
   
   Men for the most part only ask women out whom they have a "romantic interest" in. Eventually they hope for physical intimacy.
   Some women however have been known to accept offers to go out with men they found unattractive because they saw them as being "nice" or just because the event/activity gave them "something to do".
   Therein lies one of the many differences between the two genders.
   At the end of the date if the man leans in for a kiss goodnight and the woman turns her head away or pushes him away they become upset with each other whether they verbally state it or not.
   The woman feels: "He expected me to kiss him because he took me out!"
   The man feels: "She used me to get a free meal/show or whatever"
   In reality they're both wrong because they (assumed) the other approached the date with the same mindset!
   The man thought she said yes to the date because she was attracted to him! He assumes she knows and understands men only ask women out whom they find attractive.
   The woman thought he asked her out because he felt like having company or didn't want to go to the event alone.
   If women make an assumption the reason why men ask them out is because they {are} romantically interested or sexually attracted to them; they're likely to be 99% correct! 
   There is a reason why he asked (you) out and not the short overweight woman with the missing two front teeth and moon crater skin. Having said that there's an old nightclub adage that goes:
   "I've never gone to bad with an ugly woman but I've woke up with a few." This implies the guy was drunk and desperate at "last call" time.

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   1. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I meant to type: "I've never gone to (bed) with an ugly woman but I've woke up with a few."
      At any rate it's another great gender question and topic!

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   2. 85

      gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      THANK YOU!

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   3. 83

      Venkatachari Mposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Smart and appealing reply.

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4. 67

   Huntgoddessposted 8 years ago

   There is no such thing as an ugly human being.
   
   If you love a person, and she or he is a friend, and she or he is kind and nice to you, she or he will always look nice or even beautiful to you personally.
   
   Has anyone seen the movie, Shallow Hal? That's what it's all about.

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   1. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      In the "real world" everyone has seen ugly or unattractive people. No matter how kind/nice someone is with a heart of gold when they first saw them they thought they were physically unattractive! Beauty/ugly is in the eye of the beholder.

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   2. 85

      gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Exactly Mr. Dashing, NOT EVERY WOMAN IS BEAUTIFUL.  Many are indeed hard on the eye i.e. ugly.  These are the facts.

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   3. 67

      Huntgoddessposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I'm seeing some really nasty, narrow-minded, bigoted and ugly remarks here on this board -- or whatever it is?
      
      I feel so sad for some of you guys. Two in particular.
      
      You cannot be happy or find  joy in life. Just exploitation.

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   4. 59

      Kiss andTalesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      The problem is people really do think this and is expressing their heart, I feel sorry for the people that will be in these people lives , it is one thing written,  but another experience being the victim of such uglyiness,beautiful faces but rotten

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5. 59

   Kiss andTalesposted 8 years ago

   Really rather homely could be a clean moral person, and person who does not show all her goods , a person who is confident in protecting her body and mind from the trash of  the world , she may be an untouch flower, her pearl
   Is like in the ocean,  not easy to find, only the one that knows treasures will know her worth.
   While many will see the shell on the surface,  she is much more then the eye can see.

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   1. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Excellent point. However men don't go out of their way to approach/pursue homely women for dates and relationships.
      It's been said: "A man falls in love with his eyes and a woman falls in love with her ears."
      A nice face/body easily draws men.

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   2. 85

      gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Homely women AREN'T confident, in fact, they're the opposite.  They have no self-consciousness nor self-awareness.  They are oftentimes quite insecure.  They also have NO PRIDE in themselves.

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   3. 59

      Kiss andTalesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      That depends dash for your picture of beauty is not another's
      Women who have been damage by terrible effects , fires , acid, beatings, birth defects have husbands , or mates,
      Beauty is where you want it to be , the heart is the best.

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   4. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Kiss andTales , I said over and over again that "beauty is the eye of the beholder". No one is defining beauty here for anyone.

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   5. 59

      Kiss andTalesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I do not agree in many of the post that tear down others by getting them to agree that another person lacking what another have is a flaw.  We all are children of God, lets  love our neighbors by words and deeds.true marks of real love.

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6. 92

   Faceless39posted 8 years ago

   I would say that's probably true for young and shallow men. As men age and grow wise, however, they really want to spend time with someone who understands them, energizes them, and supports their ambitions, etc. When someone is perfect for your soul, you will see them through rose colored glasses, so to speak.

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   1. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      I doubt many (men) would pursue a relationship with a woman they found completely unattractive. Everyone is entitled to have "preferences".
      Shallow is in the eye of the beholder: short/tall, non-smoker, weight, race...etc could all be "shallow"

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   2. 85

      gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Men want beautiful/attractive women.  Beauties get kissed while uglies get dissed!

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   3. 59

      Kiss andTalesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      gmwillians you want people to agree in tearing down another human to feel superior , what is ugly is your statement,  a person could get along better with a kind heart then an ugly one. True !

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   4. 80

      dashingscorpioposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Kiss andTales , It's not about agreeing to tear anyone down! We're acknowledging a fact: (generally speaking) people want to date people (they) are physically attractive to. Ask any man would he prefer a woman (he) found physically attractive.

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   5. 59

      Kiss andTalesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Dashing I usually agree to your many comments, true as said first impression can be last, but also do not judge books by covers, These questions from gmwillians have been more negative and bias to certain disabilities,  and status of rich and poor.

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7. 85

   gmwilliamsposted 8 years ago

   
   
   All succinctly good answers I might add.  As the late Joan Rivers maintained looks ARE important. Ms. Rivers indicated that men are drawn to beauty and attractiveness and women in the known keep themselves up physically.  Yes, looks are paramount in a man's eyes. 
   
   Beautiful women are preferred on dates.  They are chosen over average-looking, plain women.  Plain, average-looking women are the last ones men ask on dates.  Men are visual creatures, who are initially attracted to physicality.   Men want and appreciate what is pleasing and easy on the eyes.  Beautiful women are pleasing and easy on the eyes.
   
   Average-looking, plain women, au contraire, can be hard and displeasing on male eyes.  They are not attractors in the real sense of the word.  Average-looking, plain women are not considered dating/romantic material but are relegated to the status of friend and/or pal.  Average-looking, plain women do no have that oomph, magnetism, and allure that beautiful women have. 
   
   One can make an analogy between filet mignon and chuck steak.  Filet mignon is the finest of steaks while chuck steak is merely average.  Well, men want the finest and beautiful women are by definition are the finest while homely, plain are ......blah, average.  Men do not want average, they want fine and will resort to average only as the last resort.  That is life.

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