I'd like feedback on my article: How to balance your protein for muscle-bone...

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   Miebakagh57posted 6 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article How to balance your protein for muscle-bone strength. What can I do to improve? Thanks!

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   Rupert Taylorposted 6 years ago

   These nutrition articles are a dime a million on the Internet. You have to find a way to make yours stand out from the crowd. Frankly, I can't think of a way that can be done.
   
   You need to use Title Face for your headline and sub-heads.
   
   There are a lot of grammar errors. I suggest using Grammarly or Hemmingway to catch and fix these.
   
   However, none of this deals with the fundamental problem of writing in a highly competitive area without, it seems from your bio, any professional skills in the field.

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      Miebakagh57posted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Rupert, thank you for the suggestions.
      I use google browser, and it is compactible with grammarly. I ran every word in my hub through grammarly. But I don't know were you get it that many grammars are in the story.
      I think you can do a test like copying a sub-title in the article into grammarly for windows and reading,checiking for grammar errors, and point out where I err.
      I am on to reviwing the hub for feature purpose.
      Thanks again, and welcome to my world.

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   psycheskinnerposted 6 years ago

   I would question the accuracy of many of the statements in this hub.  It is not enough to say "science says that", you need to cite a reputable, evidence-based, peer reviewed source.

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      Miebakagh57posted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Hi psycheskinner,
      Welcome and thanks for visiting my hub.
      There are many eveidence on this fact online and in educational review.
      However, I am still review my hub to upgrade it.
      When done, I will cite the evidence, but my article is not a scholarstic paper or science digest. It was just an article for every one. The facts are basic and all science students and commoners know the basics, right?
      Once again, thank you.

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   aesta1posted 6 years ago

   I think you have the points here but unless you edit this and make your points clearer, many of these points will just be lost in the clutter of ideas. For example, avocado is mentioned in the upper half and then, a picture of it almost at the end saying how good it is though your picture in the upper half says that it is only 3% protein and 80% fat. I think you need to clarify. Placing many points without clarifying erodes your authority on this topic.
   
   Edit for greater conciseness and clarity and also spelling. Now, that you have 2700 words, organize your ideas so you get across your main key ideas clearly.

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      Miebakagh57posted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Hello aesta1, thanks for visiting my hub. Your suggestions will stand me well. I will carry out all your suggestions.
      Thank you and once again, welcome.

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   Rupert Taylorposted 6 years ago

   Hi Miebakagh
   
   You ask "I don't know were you get it that many grammars are in the story." That's grammatically incorrect in itself. It should be where not were and grammar errors not grammars.
   
   I'll give you a few examples:
   
   "Let’s take some example (should be examples) of protein sources in everyday life: red meat, lean meat, (red meat and lean meat are the same thing) skinless poultry and turkey, egg white and milk casein and whey milk. Fish like a (the indefinite article should be removed) sardine, tilapia, mullet, tuna, and cod; (remove the semi colon and add as well as ) kinds of seafood like oysters, lobsters, clam, shrimp, and crabs. But beware (needs a comma) crabs can be a  (remove indefinite article) very toxin (should be toxic).
   
   "Plant protein is obtained from seeds, nuts, roots and sometimes fruits. Almonds, ground nuts, cashew nuts, legumes or bean group and quinoa contained (contain) plant proteins."
   
   Hope that helps

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      Miebakagh57posted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Hello Rupert, I gave you a pass for your comments in the first paragraph. I accept my errors and omissions.
      The browser I used to respond to you is Maxthon, which is not compatible with Grammarly because Google was not responding.
      But why did Grammarly gave the very opposite of your examples or are you using another spell checker? What is it?
      Thank you again for visiting.

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         DrMark1961posted 6 years agoin reply to this

         Those programs are designed to fix spelling, small gramamtical errors, etc. Your text is difficult to read and requires major revisions. Rupet gave you some examples but you need a careful editing of the entire article. Do you have an American or British school teacher in your area that would be willing to look at your articles before you publish?

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   Rupert Taylorposted 6 years ago

   I am not using any software. I am using 50 years experience as an editor and writer.

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      Miebakagh57posted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Welcome. I am going to follow you.

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   Miebakagh57posted 6 years ago

   Welcome, DrMark and thank you. I am revising and editing the article again and running it through Grammarly for spelling and grammartical errors. I am even grateful for Rupert for his examples. But I wonder why Grammarly gave the very opposite of the examples of repert? More than this, I am trying to bring it down to about 2500 or 2700 words. Is that idea?

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