Steering clear of negativity
Do you make an effort to steer clear of interactions and activities you perceive as negative? Whether it's negative forum thread exchanges, provocative forum posts, negative Q&As, negative personalities, or negative people in your daily life. How do you maintain your positive space?
Yes, I do steer clear of negative people in my life. They are toxic and will only bring you down. As far as on here, I think it to be an impossibility if you have strong convictions about the way you live your life. Someone is always going to think differently and communicate it. I try to stay away from these type of debates, but sometimes it is just impossible.
It depends on what you consider negative. There are actually two types of people on HP. Those that think anyone who disagrees with their points of view are negative. And those who think that promoting hatred and bigotry are negative.
I prefer to think of myself at the latter type. Opposing points of view with a staunch belief that you cannot possible wrong - is, well - just plain wrong. And often times difficult to have any kind of a productive discussion with.
If one cannot accept that there are other points of view that are just as valid as yours, then they have closed minds and cannot be reasoned with, and take the enjoyment out of having a debate with.
Those who are hateful, spiteful, and hurtful - need to simply be ignored.
Recently in particular I've tried to do so; I've tried to engage people in conversations on things that matter at times and often found myself getting into arguments, and so have decided to just not comment. If I realize people just want an argument rather than truly having an exchange of views, I back off. It's hard to avoid people who call and dump their troubles on you; if they're friends or family, you kind of have to listen.
That said, if someone comes out with something that's truly awful that's directed toward a particular group of people, it seems like not speaking up is wrong -- hard to know what to do in that case. I guess I speak my peace once, and then let it go. Some things you just can't change.
Negativity in general is not a good way to live life. A constantly negative attitude can affect others around you as well as your overall health and well-being. However, as JThomp42 expressed, one cannot be positive about everything if one has any principles by which to live. Most every subject (especially current issues) has negative factors that are just as relevant as the positive factors. A person who refuses to ever be negative is a person who refuses to acknowledge all the facts on a given subject.
Thought-provoking question. Thanks.
The negative people I have to deal with are hurting, bitter, or angry about something. I usually ignore this or briefly indicate that I am listening. Most ofthe time, they are just venting and won't listen to what I have to say. I will speak up if they try to push their own negativity on me. I will impose boundaries as to what I will or will not listen to. Unfortunately, some people ignore the boundaries. I consciously try to keep a positive attitude and stay neutral.
It's almost like a skill. Once you get the idea of postive or negative you usually start out trying to be positive and your against negative.. You realize that doesn't work out and you start having negativity again but it's uneasy now. Your now more and more positive and negativity is balancing out but still kind of uneasy. Then you get to a point where you just see the negativity and you "see" it but it doesn't affect you (you ignore it). Then after that, the so called master stage you learn how to deal with negativeness and take there opinion either being able to have sincere understanding with a postive energy "negative doesn't affect you" and respond positively to them even though there negative, either thanking them and helping them or just ignoring them if your not in the mood. But this is the basis of it all people might deal with it differently, but I just "see" it and still thank/encourage them or ignore them, negativity doesn't affect me though. Hope this helps
Separation can be good for increasing your own positive footing. There have been times when I've had to make a separation for extended periods.
But it helps to take 100% responsibility even for someone else's negativity. This is not "blame" (negative, effect), but responsibility (positive, cause). By doing this, there is no room left for being a victim. This is the foundation of forgiveness. The heart of forgiveness, of course, is love and humility.
Ultimately, though, we need to be able to be "aware" of a storm of negative things (evil), while keeping our attention on perfection of the positive, just as Jesus did when he walked on the storm-tossed Sea of Galilee.
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