Birds are chirping loudly
And Day is giving way to the night.
I can feel only silence inside me,
Making me realize nothing is Alright.
There is a feeling of emptiness left
And whole lots of memories to regret.
I feel so battered at this very moment
Like my heart is burning in a fire torment.
The rushing wind touched my face
And the tears stormed out of my eyes.
Ur absence suddenly struck my heart
And my whole world fell apart.
I don't know what happened,
Why u left me with so many questions?
All i know is I loved you
And now am left with no clue.
Please don't leave me baby
I'm sure we can work it out.
Please don't turn deaf to my plea's
I don't have the strength to shout.
Just tell me u love me
And I'll be here forever.
Just tell me u need me
I'll leave you never!!
It sounds like someone who lost their lover.... someone they were deeply and romantically in love with...
Yeah U r right Subarban poet.. A girl going through the most excruciating situation , she realises thr was nothing she cud do to make the love of her life stop from leaving her.. He meant everything to her but she has to face the truth that she meant nothing to him, nothing at all..
Thanks for stopping by
I'll hazard to guess- death of a loved one?
Haven't a clue to be honest...just guessing.
lol I will have to agree with Ralwus, honestly it ended better then it started. It would be nice if the brevity factor was equal throughout.
Probably Worth Giving Up Your Day Job As Well
You Could Win the Quinella Here! (that's 1st & 2nd past the post)
Might As Well Go For It!!!
Might as well be a loser on both counts!!
I have never, played Quinella here, if you want him to play I am kind of curious how that game goes.
I'd agree with the break up. obviously. left with questions, without a care, sounds like someone cheated and they do not deserve your begging them to come back.
I am not sure how one feels silence.... but I would hazard a guess that this relationship is one where both are young people, and there is much to be learned about life and love...and this was one of those relationships where you were just "trying love on for size" and neither party was really ready for a true committment. Its probably time to reassess, learn from it and figure out what it is you really need and want from life. Take it from a bunch of old poets who have loved, lost, loved, left, loved, loved, and loved again. Eventually, you get it right, and you know it
but since the question was to guess the "scene" - I'm taking the question literally. My guess is - sun going down, birds chirping Madly, wind howling
San Francisco near the zoo? I never claimed to be psychic...
You have guessed it right Ernie though u don't claim to be a psychic (Is that really the case??).. Young love, stupidity, being in love with the word of love but who says both the parties weren't ready for a commitment or for something more serious??
Age doesn't really change feelings..
Lets assume this girl in the poem has all grown up now and yet she is still dreaming about the guy who ditched her 6 yrs back.. She is still not able to imagine any1 else in his place (though it does sound corny ).. Feels like her feelings are all destroyed.. She is a stone to the world but vulnerable wen it comes down to this guy, her 1st love..
Thanks for an honest reply
What's behind this? An awakening ! You just don't know it yet. Beyond one heartbreak lies a Thousand new chances .
first i thought it was a death, then it was more than a death.... the person still alive but out of love. Your poem is it?????
Cracknut case. I like this very much! good rhythm and flow but since you asked for help and advice in other questions I will say that it is better not to use things like U for you, and lots of? I am sure there are better words than this to describe your emotions. With just a little more thought and work this could be a great poem.
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MemoriesBirds are chirping loudlyAnd Day is giving way to the night.I can feel only silence inside me,Making me realize nothing is Alright.There is a feeling of emptiness leftAnd whole lots of memories to regret.I feel so battered at this very momentLike my heart is burning in a fire torment.The...
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