Can doing a "good deed" for someone be a source of discomfort to some?
A well intended thoughtful gesture may make the one who receives it feel an overwhelming need to repay the gesture. You, of course, will have no way of knowing that in most cases. What to do?
Only to those who do not love their fellow man and expect return without offering a part of themselves! Never stop doing good deeds. You give from your soul. If the act is well received, thank God. If it is degraded, pray to God. Always be who you are if giving is part of your soul. Rise and shine. God knows who you are!
Unfortunately, there is some truth is the saying "no good deed ever goes unpunished." Helping people sometimes makes them feel a) indebted or b) weak (depending on the type of help) Even when they really need help and you are doing it out of friendship or out of the goodness of your heart, expecting nothing back, the very fact that they need to accept help makes them feel vulnerable and incapable and that's not a good feeling. Sometimes, when they feel stronger, they feel resentment towards you. They may realize it is unreasonable, but people can always construct some rationale for it. Sometimes it's because they themselves would not help someone without expecting something for themselves out of it, and that's sad, really. Real friends, however, are more likely to accept help in the spirit it's given.
I always believe in a friend in need is a friend indeed. I do believe in Karma & Merits and doing things to help others without having thoughts of return is my motto.
Good things come after what you have done to help others without you even thinking of them. It is a natural cycle of Karma & Merits.
There is possibly a way out. It wouldn't work in all cases, of course. But what about anonymity? That is, you help them out but they never know who it was who did it for them.
For example, many years ago I stuffed a few dollars into an envelope and left them in the letter box of a woman who lived a few streets away who I knew was very poor. She happened to be a friend of my wife.
It was very gratifying to overhear her say to my wife - as I was mowing the lawn in my front garden eyes averted - how grateful she was to some 'good Samaritan' who helped her out just when she was really worried about paying her bills.
To her dying day she never found out who it was.
Yes it can.
To avoid that happening ask the person if they would like you to do the good deed or not...if they not, do not, if say do it..do it
You have to 'feel' it out. What I mean is, take the person's personality into careful consideration before deciding 'how' to help. Then do the good deed, of course, but in a way that it will be acceptible to that individual.
by Penelope Hart 12 years ago
Do you think of doing a good deed a day, sometimes? Or often? How do you help others?What do you do that is helpful to people you know, or, do not know? How do you help them?How are they better off and how do you feel about yourself? How does it feel good?
by Frank P. Crane 10 years ago
If good deeds were immediately rewarded and bad deeds promptly punished would life be better?I ofter hear judgements about whether a matter or good or bad rendered on the basis of outcomes. Such judgments assume a "yes" to the question above. But might a good deed have a...
by milleramanda53 11 years ago
What was your "Good Deed" in 2012?
by Gregory S Williams 11 years ago
Is it possible for a person to give without truly expecting anything at all in return?Are you aware of anyone who has done this? How and in what way? And how is it that you are aware?
by suraj78 14 years ago
Hi actually I want to publish this as hub, but thought that why not to share with all hubbers so here it is:“Heed to the saying ‘Treat others as you would like to be treated’”The UN statistics say 1% of the global war funding can be used to feed every living person on planet. And according to...
by Peeples 8 years ago
Do you think being a foster parent should be a good deed or a career?Maybe I'm biased, but after a comment on one of my hubs I wanted to see what others thought. Do you think being a foster parent should be a career or a good deed?
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