'Treat others the way you wish to be treated'? A fundamental rule to life?
Widely referred to as the 'Golden Rule'
Should we all live by this rule? Could this make an individual a better person?
I'd love to hear others opinions.
I life by this concept when meeting new people. But as time goes by not all of them are worthy to be treated as I would treat myself (so I dont bother)
The "Golden Rule" is a simple rule that harnesses a fundamental power of the universe and makes life better for everyone. read more
I don't think it is always right or necessary. People vary so much, and there are certain ways I would wish to be treated that would not appeal to others.
Treat people how THEY would wish to be treated!
I think so. I think it is the key to tolerance, peace and just plain getting along with people in general. We all want to be treated with kindness, respect and love so it is only natural that we should treat others that way because that is the way we wish to be treated and they do also. We all want acceptance and by following 'The Golden Rule' that can happen. Even people I don't like very much I treat with kindness at the least.
Galatians 6:7 - Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.
I would say it is all about reciprocity. If one acts like a moron, treating others with no regard to their "well-being"....guess what? No one cares. It does come back at them big time.
On the other hand, kindness and a smile go a long way to making the world a better place for us all... isn't that the premise of "Pay it forward with acts of kindness"?
That has been proved in a lovely way at drive in coffee shops in North America where people spontaneously pay the coffee of the car behind even if they are total strangers. A miracle .... more smiles and more free coffee goes down the line.
So smile already...and the world will be a little better! It doesn't cost a cent
No. My ideas is to treat others better than you wish for yourself. I define PURE motives as doing for others and expecting nothing in return. It's funny how that seems to work, sometimes. Not always. When I do things with that attitude, it seems like it comes back 3 fold. Maybe in some other unexpected way, but never the less, it comes back with more than I gave away. Someone or something always appreciates what you do, even if it's not that person. Someone is always looking.
But is that why you do it? For the return? You have been saying others are selfish, but is that not also selfish?
I don't think selfishness is the problem. There is no such thing as a selfless act. There is only positive and negative selfishness.
Slarty.. Have you ever heard of Karma; what goes around, comes around? If your only motive is the return, it's not an act of kindness. It's an investment. I do out of kindness. Rewards can be a simple smile Feeling good about myself is reward enough.
Feeling good about yourself is the gain then. Nothing wrong with that, but it is not a selfless act.
You say you find happiness and comfort by showing others kindness. It is your illusion. It is only a concept in your mind. You have attached your inner happiness to one of your actions towards others. You then feel rewarded, which fills your void.
Slarty. Every move we make is selfless. You eat to survive. At someone elses expense is selfish. Sri T. Illusion or concept. Who cares? It feels good. Screw someone. Feels bad. That's also an illusion or concept. I choose the feel good concept.
Sri: Concepts are not illusions. They relate to underlying reality even if not in the way we think they do. Concepts may not exist as things, but they exist as information.
Words are symbols. They are not real. Even perceptions are illusions. It is only in the mind of that individual. His joy comes from his suggestion. It is not related to any external action he does. It is a false belief he has, but he believes it.
No. Life is not a bargain. Everybody doesn't have the same morals. The way around it is to allow people to be as they are with no expectation. If they are not in harmony with you, simply move on to other people. There is no ironclad guarantee that others will be kind to you because you are kind to them or vice versa. Some people are not right for you, and you may not be what they are seeking in a person.
Ironclad guarantee? Good luck with that. That sounds very selfish. Like, "what's in it for me?" If you are not willing to risk being hurt, you have no chance of being happy. Only very lonely.
The idea is to understand the all happiness comes from within. The wise do not depend on the kindness from others. The kindness of others comes and goes. If you abide in your own joy, it is irrelevant what others do.
I find happiness and comfort within showing kindness to others, regardless of what their response is. I am dependent on my own conscience . I cannot believe one can have the ability to be kind to themselves if not with others. Sounds isolated.
Your ultimate question is, can living by the "Golden Rule" make an individual a better person?
While I would say living by this rule would add to the development of one's experiences and therefore help them determine the quality of their own path, in and of itself, I would have my doubts about "making" them better.
In my humble opinion, the only thing that leads a person to "be better" is the acknowledgement of their status and then the decision to improve themselves. They must decide for themselves how they want to live and what they want from life. Without knowing what behavior needs to be changed and the desire to change the root belief of it, no behavioral modification by itself will be effective.
I would agree with just helen regarding the variety of peoples perceptions and the concept that what is good for me may not be good for you. That being said, living life with a penchant for love, joy, peace and kindness would rarely go unnoticed.
Pretty good question.
I agree, but denial will keep you from that. You have to recognize a problem as a problem, such as selfishness. People don't change unless there is a good reason to change. If you don't recognize and accept, you don't know your true status.
Agreed IDONO, however the acknowledgement of one's status can only come from within. Anything else is an external judgment, which may or may not be true or appropriate. I also agree that denial hides reality, but this too can only come from within.
Agreed. But that assessment has to be done with complete honesty with yourself , which is harder than being honest about someone else. Ego doesn't allow this. If you can, then you have to accept what you find. Only then, will you seek solutions.
If it were a different time I would say yes, however people today have no morals or values. I try to be a good person to everyone I come in contact with but sometimes they don't welcome kindness. At that point I just ignore them. I would say there are a lot of lonely people out there because of their bad behavior. Some where along the way people have lost their ability to love, be kind and most importantly have good character. Life now is not a life as I knew it 25 years ago. Young people have no respect for the most part for human life let alone be kind.
I think the inverted version is more true. Don't treat others the way you don't want to be treated. I think this is a lighter burden compared to treating others how you would treat yourself. This version only sets what you don't do. You may still treat others less nice than how you treat yourself or in other ways that better please them.
Living by this rule could make an individual a better person in many ways. It could also make the world a better place to live. Many times people that are treated badly go into a state of depression and non caring. These people then treat others the way they have been treated and this tends to make the world a not so pleasant place to live. By sharing love and letting go of assumptions a person can grow and help to contribute to a better world. This, in turn will make for more happy people and less depressed people and contribute to a much more beloved society as a whole.
Yes, Its a good rule to follow. If everyone followed this "golden rule" then everyone would be treating each other right. It probably would make an individual a better person, and a more positive person. Nobody wants to be treated badly, so nobody should ever treat anyone else bad. If you treat someone good, hopefully they'll treat you good in return. People should use "ethics", and do the right thing. Some people are rude, mean, and would never follow such a rule. Some people don't change or won't change to be a better person.
Start by treating people the way you would like to be treated. From them on treat them the way they treat you. If they treated you badly occasionally treat them well, but treat them well increasingly less often. And try to make them aware that it is their behaviour is making you behave the way you do.
As to whether it would make you a better person, define better? If you do not take care it could lead to you becoming treated like a doormat.
Of course if someone treats you badly sometimes being nice can make them change. Just don't bank on it.
It is the "Golden Rule" and a good one to live by although at times very difficult. It is not as easy as it sounds. The Golden Rule or as it is also known the "Rule of Reciprocity" is found in all religions.
I try to live the Golden Rule everyday but like I already said it is difficult. For one thing people think differently based on their lifestyle, perspectives, social status, environment, so what I think is appropriate treatment may be insulting to another.
I guess if the intentions are good and right, then that is all that matters.
Yes I feel it is. If everyone followed that rule even half the time imagine how much better our life would be.
Actually Jesus lectured about this and the guy wrote down the part he could remember. Jesus did not teach how to have a better life, because what does that mean? Does it mean having a better death?
Jesus taught Do unto others as you would have them do unto you since that is what is going to happen to you. That could not be more simple. Or MC Yogi says "What you give, is what you get. A better life for a Muslim terrorist means to kill more infidels. A better life for a Nazi is to kill more Jews. A better life for a child molester is to molest more children.
A better life for someone that loves money is to create a business that makes you filthy, filthy, filthy stinking rich while all of your employees barely get by in life. A better life for a Sikh is to grow a bigger beard and wear a nicer turban. A better life as a cyclist is to lie and NOT get caught about taking sports enhancing drugs. That is how to have a better life. To be a better soldier KILL as many of the enemy as you can. The more, the better!
I agree with many of these answers; thank you all for sharing your opinion.
In my opinion, I do not believe it can entirely make you a better person, but it will make you more mindful of how you treat others.
As just helen said, all individuals wish to be treated differently, but it's almost a sure bet they would wish to be treated with kindness and respect; if you know how they wish to be treated you should treat them according.
It takes a big person to treat all with respect and kindness, regardless of if it is returned or not; knowing that you are a kind, respectful individual can make you feel like you have accomplished something that, as unfortunate as it is, many people have not achieved yet.
IDONO, your answer was fantastic, whether your kindness is not noticed by the individual, it is almost always noticed by others!
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