Funny Political Quotes

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  1. profile image0
    SirDentposted 7 years ago

    ''Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it.''   Mark Twain

  2. Mighty Mom profile image85
    Mighty Momposted 7 years ago

    Sir Dent -- Twain's quote makes you think, doesn't it?
    Name a politician -- any politician, on either side of the aisle -- and apply Twain's question. You don't get a clear-cut answer, do you?

    1. profile image0
      SirDentposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      So true.  Democrats and republicans alike play to whatever side lines their pockets most or to their own agenda.

  3. profile image0
    Muldanianposted 7 years ago

    John Prescott, the former deputy prime minister, was reported as saying "It's great to be back on terracotta," when stepping onto the runway after a long flight.  I think he is England's answer to George W. Bush.

  4. profile image0
    SirDentposted 7 years ago

    ''Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.''  Groucho Marx

  5. Doug Hughes profile image61
    Doug Hughesposted 7 years ago

    SirDent is old enough to remember Mark Twain and Groucho Marx.
    I'm old enough to remember Bob Hope.

    Here's few I found from Bob.

    "Eisenhower admitted that the budget can't be balanced and McCarthy said the communists are taking over. You don't know what to worry about these days – whether the country will be overthrown or overdrawn."

    "You can tell he used to be a rancher. He squeezes Republicans like he's milking a cow." –On Lyndon Johnson

    "You never had to ask his score. Just count the casualties." –On Spiro Agnew's atrocious golf game

    "Where else but in America could the women's liberation movement take off their bras, then go on TV to complain about their lack of support?"

    "The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie – and an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark ..."

    "Carter wants to go to Washington. He'll feel right at home there - he was raised on a nut farm ... Every time he grins, someone tries to write 'Steinway' on his upper lip."

    "Ronnie's hero is Calvin Coolidge and Nancy's is Calvin Klein." –On the Reagans

    "(Dan) Quayle thinks Roe vs. Wade are two ways to cross the Potomac."

    1. profile image0
      SirDentposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Not bad Doug.  smile

  6. profile image0
    SirDentposted 7 years ago

  7. Mighty Mom profile image85
    Mighty Momposted 7 years ago

    The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'.
    -- Larry Hardiman

  8. Stump Parrish profile image60
    Stump Parrishposted 7 years ago

    I dont think these need an introduction.

    You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.

    I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport

    "You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror." --interview with CBS News' Katie Couric, Sept. 6, 2006

    "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family." --Greater Nashua, N.H., Chamber of Commerce, Jan. 27, 2000

    "I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound largemouth bass in my lake." --on his best moment in office, interview with the German newspaper Bild am Sonntag, May 7, 2006

    "They misunderestimated me." --Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000 ( I know where palin gets it now)

    "For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." --Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001 (Must be time to reload)

    "Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." --LaCrosse, Wis., Oct. 18, 2000

    "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter." --in parting words to world leaders at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as those present looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan, July 10, 2008

    "I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office." --Washington, D.C., May 12, 2008

    "There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee -- that says, fool me once, shame on --shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again." --Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

    "Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." --Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

    "You work three jobs? ... Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that." --to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005

    I dont even have to list the Brainiac quoted here, do I?

    I do have to ask this,  does the Republican Party get a big tax credit for hiring the mentally handicapped? Please again I beg you, Run Palin for president. she has the ability to exceed Dubya's mentalistics.

    It's not stupid is as stupid does any more. It now stupid is and stupid gets the Republican presidential nomination.

    1. PrettyPanther profile image84
      PrettyPantherposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      "The problem with political jokes is they get elected." --  Henry Cate VII

      Be careful what you wish for!  smile

  9. Mighty Mom profile image85
    Mighty Momposted 7 years ago

    We do miss Dan Quayle and W, don't we?

  10. Mighty Mom profile image85
    Mighty Momposted 7 years ago

    I saw that one, too, PP.
    Pretty much says it all, doesn't it?

  11. Charles James profile image77
    Charles Jamesposted 7 years ago

    Our beloved former Prime Minister John Major said
    "When our back is against the wall we turn around and fight".

    Of an earlier Prime Minister 
    "How can you tell when Harold Wilson is lying? - His lips move".

    Graffiti in a pub when Prime Minister Thatcher was in office - "Say it with flowers - Send Thatcher a triffid".

  12. Hugh Williamson profile image90
    Hugh Williamsonposted 7 years ago

    Here's a few from Will Rogers which are still timely...

    The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"

    Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing -- and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.

    If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?


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