There's an old saying among the older generation: "Never look for someone you love; find someone who loves YOU." Given the reality that the person we love is neither guaranteed or even obligated to love us back the same why, which is more important to you (and why)....finding someone you love, or finding someone who loves YOU?
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Aaah: But does being more secure equate to being "happy"?
Is it fair to one's spouse to marry them without being "in love" with them? I imagine they'd want someone who is "in love" with them also!:) Would you stay if you knew your mate didn't?