Why don't people in their 20s and 30s get married anymore?
In the 70s, when I was in my twenties, men and women got married and, usually, wanted to have families. What has happened to change that?
Women in the workforce, I would imagine. The more the working gap lessened between men and women, the more likely that women focused on their career before starting a family.
Of course, as a guy, I'm only speculating...
Career is a top priority for everyone these days. Ppl wanna get their professional life setlled b4 they can move on to the personal front. Another reason can be the increasing number of divorces which have left litlle or no faith in marriages.. When you can live-in with your partner then y go for something u aint sure vl last?
More choice I suppose, speaking as a twentysomething. Society doesn't have that expectation anymore that by 35-40 you have to be married and have kids. It's more free I feel than before. Also, it costs approximately $200,000 to raise a child to 0-17 in today's world.
I believe that women and men want to have fun first because in their state of mind they believe marriage to be a lock down. Women wanna keep their bodies and men wanna have their freedom. I am with a 36 year old and we said we would get married in about 2 to 3 more years. We have been together for 2 years now. After we get married is when we will have kids. (I already have a 7 yr old son) Also there has been research done that when you marry at such a young age you are more likely to divorce. 30's are the new 20's and 40's are the new 30's. Hope this helps:D
Well the divorce rate is really high nowadays. For me personally, I am in no rush what so ever to marry.People change a lot between age 20 to age 30. Shoot, I just got out of a year long relationship and I've changed a lot in the last year!
Oh and I want to have my masters degree before I even think about marriage and my student loans paid off
(This question may just inspire a hub! It has me thinking.)
I got married when I was 30, but that was after 2 years of living with my husband. I didn't start dating him until I was 27. Until I was about 24, the mere thought of marriage made me cringe, and I still had a little of that fear when I met him. That's why it took him so long to talk me into marriage. He was ready much sooner. Of course, he was 36 when we started dating. It just took us that long to find each other and prepare ourselves to be in a completely committed relationship that we know will last.
I think there's multiple reasons as to why people don't really get married in their 20s and 30s anymore...
1. Women are more career minded.
2. High rate in Divorce, so people want to be sure of their decision before jumping into marriage.
3. Fear of commitment. People just want to have fun when they believe they can.
4. Marriage to younger people aren't necessarily seen as a true commitment since they are able to divorce so easily. Marriage isn't taken seriously anymore.
5. Some people now just aren't interested in marrying. Being together with their significant other and have kids and a family with that other person as if they were married though.
6. Lack of good role models that have been married.
7. Too much pressure looking for 'the one'
8. Not the 'right time'.
I'm sure with more time I would be able to think up of other reasons.
Anyways, my boyfriend and I have been together since high school and have been together for six years. We have plans to get married in the future, but definitely not in the next few years. We are able to grow and learn from our mistakes with each other and see how we react after a fight. We aren't financially stable right now, nor have we finished college. So right now isn't the 'right time' for us to get married. When we're ready, we'll get married. Right now, we'll just learn about life and travel and do things we wouldn't be able to do once we settle down and have children. (not saying we couldn't when we have those kind of things, it would just be more difficult!)
Has marriage gone out of style? Why are children being raised in homes without a father? read more
There are many reasons, some people choose not to do so, others play games and waste time until these years have passed and then get serious. Another big reason is money. It costs a lot to get married, buy a home, and children are very expensive. Getting married is simply not a priority when many people of this age are living with their parents or grandparents and others this age are living with a huge number of roommates on wages at or below the poverty level.
Then you have the fact that there are so many people who are single parents for a variety of reasons. If the child came prior to a marriage, those expenses come first and many find they don't have money or the commitment for marriage. Think about the costs to buy a home, most people in their 20's and 30's don't have it and might not have it until a decade or two later, if ever.
Other single parents will find it difficult to find someone who is accepting. I have no kids and I'm single and I must have the same in my spouse. Also, there are young men and women who choose to focus on their careers and education.
I think it is because:
1. The society we lived in these days is corrupt.
2. The high-cost of living makes it difficult to build a family.
3. Morality is dead - sadly.
I see a different answer. Very few people in their 20s and 30s now grew up as children of a happy family. Many grew up with only one parent. Others grew up with parents who got divorced not too long later. If we don't see, as children, that marriage leads to happiness, we are unlikely to try it for ourselves. And, if our parents couldn't make marriage work, are we likely to believe that we can?
A bad economy (or the perception of an unstable economic future) is a BIG issue in making long-term commitments and having kids. Today one of the big differences with the first half of the 20th century is the increasing uncertainty of a person's future (life-time employment and pension vs job-hopping and 401K) and the amount of time and money which we dedicate to education (high school and college and often professional/graduate school). Educational costs have sky-rocketed since the 1980s and most young people enter their first job with staggering student loan debts--and then have to save for a marriage, which can often cost as much as a new car or a downpayment on a home.
For what it's worth, my own family's marriage history from 1800 onwards shows delayed marriages for the males. I believe they delayed marriage because they were working-class and they lived in an expensive region, near New York City. Working class males in particular were taught to marry only after they had finished an apprenticeship/education (after age 17/18) and only after they had some savings to prove they were responsible people (typically after ages 27-28). These ages are later today.
I don't necessarily disagree with social critics who point to divorce making people hesitant, careers and life-style interfering with the sacrifices for family, or to living together substituting for marriage. But I've witnessed the economics play out in my own family since the 1980s ("we're saving for our wedding"). Delayed marriage strikes me as a reasonable thing given the changing of what constitutes middle class post-WWII in the US.
Actually, my wife and I were married 1 year ago next month. I am 35 and she is 34. We were best friends in high school and pretty much stayed that way for 16 years. We dated for about a year and then got married, and are now expecting our first child.
But we may be the esception to the rule...
Nowadays, men and women have priorities other than getting married. The main reason why they do not marry on their 20's is that they feel the need of fulfilling their dreams and at the same time, they want to grow on their chosen career path or to enjoy the life of being single. People are more practical this time, they want to have all they need and want before getting married. Men want to have their own business or their own house before marriage, so that all will be in place when they decide to settle down.
Probably because work has overtaken priorities. Most folks these days prefer to concentrate on their careers and work their way up the ladder. Marriage is probably an afterthought (not for all though, I don't want to generalize).
Another factor is their own personal experience with marriage (as in their parents' marriage). If their parents have divorced and it had been a messy marriage, I don't think that inspires a sense of desire in the children of those marriages to marry themselves when they grow up. It may probably take then a while to realize that they do want to get marry after all.
Why don't people in their 20s and 30s get married anymore?
people in their 20s and 30s get married.
For example one girl is married in 20 to 30. At the age of 40 she becomes ill, and cannot walk , hip pains, workloads, child or children homeworks --because she dontknow , how to do their projectworks.
so early marriage is iMPORTANT, so she go to office, and market, and cooking, and go to school, and left her child and go to office. the same work is going on and on till at the age of 60
by Akarime31 7 years ago
Do you think that marriage is really necessary?My parents got married because "it was the right thing to do" not because they were in love with each other. Now after a nasty deparation and 27 agonizing years, they are finally happy.
by OutsideTheLines 13 years ago
Why do people get married so young?I'm only 20 and it seems like a lot of my friends either are married or engaged. Why do people do this?
by prettydarkhorse 14 years ago
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