Is it better to marry a person you like to talk,or someone you are physically attracted?
Physical attraction tends to wane and is not a good basis for a marriage. You have to like the person and love spending time together.
I'd agree with Hendrika, but also add that you need to have both if your going to marry a person - initially you need to be attracted to a person to consider marrying them and for the longevity of your marriage you need to make sure that you get on with the person.
What you need to remember is marriage to a person is not the end but the beginning of a wonderful journey - how that journey plans out depends on you and the other person. Make sure you pack your journey with allot of 'Give-n-Take' and 'Forgive-n-Forget' for it to be an enjoyable trip.
We need people in our lives that like us. People that we like to be with. On a day to day basis physical attraction can only go so far. Find someone you enjoy spending time with. Someone who knows how to make you laugh. If you never look beyond the surface appearance of an individual you may miss out on a true treasure.
I love to have a lasting relationship if I am to marry the person. So, it has to be a person that I am able to communicate as well as being attracted to.
That way, it will be 100% of love and affection. Though people may say that it is hard to have best of both world but I am happy to say that I have found my love that has both.
It may sound incredible but then it is true as we have been married for more than 27 years and still growing strong as we do things together and talking the same topic as well as shopping for things we like.
I know this doesn't answer the "which is better" question, but I say people ought to hold off until they find someone with both qualities. There are a lot of physically attractive creeps and jerks out there, but it's pretty difficult to imagine wanting to be married to someone who offers great conversation but isn't someone his/her spouse is attracted to.
Of course, what this question doesn't address is the fact that there's such a thing as people who are great to talk to AND are physically attractive to the other - who still are people that "other" should not marry.
There needs to be mutual love (of the right kind) and respect. If those two things are there, one reason it is is usually because the person is someone who we find "great to talk to". Also, if that right kind of mutual love and respect are there, even people we'd find all that physically attractive can seem to become surprisingly more so.
You need to enjoy spending time with them, conversing, laughing, just enjoying their company. You need to have some physical attraction to them, to have a good, proper, successful relationship. But you cannot base a marriage entirely on looks. It just doesn't work. And besides, looks fade, and physical abilities diminish. The soul is the thing that stands strong throughout the good, the bad, and age. You need to love a person for who they are, not what they are, or what they have. You need to love a person in a way so that if all else fails, you will still love being with them. Looks are not deep, they are shallow, and I am afraid my friend, that relationships are an ocean.
I think you are going to have to initially be attracted to that person, at least. Even if passion fades, it's important to have had it there in the beginning, otherwise you're really missing out.
Start with one, end up with both. I have a bunch of friends that I enjoy talking to; some on certain subjects, a few are good conversationalist in just about every topic under the sky. Yet, I cannot imagine another relationship that is more than platonic with them. In my experience, when you get physically attracted to a person; a conversation is unavoidable. And when you DO love a person, you care about their interest and dreams, vice versa and the sharing begins. I have known people who loves their spouse deeply, yet all they do is spend time together without a lot of talking.
Mr.X is reading on the porch, Mrs.X sits next to him, knitting. Mrs.X puts down her knitting and stepped into the house. A couple of minutes later, the sound of soft music drifted out to the front. Mr.X smiles and place his book on the side table, he stood up and turn to the front door as Mrs.X walked out. Both smiling, Mr.A open his arms in a welcoming gesture as Mrs.A moved in to the steps of their favorite dance.
Sometime, the deepest bond isn't all about spoken words but the easy understanding and knowing you are perfect for each other.
What a silly ...and pointless question. If you are going to marry someone...you better be getting the full package...or it is destined to fail.
by Tigercub684 7 years ago
Can a gay man be attracted to a specific girl, but not women in general, and still be gay, not bi?As a writer, i'm wondering if it's possible for a gay or straight character to be attracted to a person of the gender that opposes their typical sexuality? Like, a gay person to be in love with a...
by seriousnuts 6 years ago
Marry the one you love or the one who loves you?Would you rather marry the person you love but does not love you as much OR marry someone you don't love but is head over heels on you?
by AnonimusAdvice 10 years ago
A follow up To my "SEXY is not the same thing as BEAUTIFUL" essay
by kysstaylor28 12 years ago
Can you love someone but not be attracted to them?I was in a 5yr marriage that ended (long story) but anyway I was never physically attracted to him but I married him and had his kids was that really love?
by Ultimate Hubber 7 years ago
If you fell in love with someone 20 years elder than you, would you marry them?
by vinividivici 13 years ago
Which one is better - Love marriage or arranged?The issue is debatable all over the globe especially in eastern countries where arrange marriage is a tradition. As you read this question which option strikes in your mind first and why?
Copyright © 2025 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
Copyright © 2025 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective owners.
As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.
For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy
Show DetailsNecessary | |
---|---|
HubPages Device ID | This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons. |
Login | This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service. |
Google Recaptcha | This is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy) |
Akismet | This is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Google Analytics | This is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Traffic Pixel | This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. |
Amazon Web Services | This is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy) |
Cloudflare | This is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Hosted Libraries | Javascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy) |
Features | |
---|---|
Google Custom Search | This is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Maps | Some articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Charts | This is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy) |
Google AdSense Host API | This service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Google YouTube | Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Vimeo | Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Paypal | This is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Login | You can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Maven | This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy) |
Marketing | |
---|---|
Google AdSense | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Google DoubleClick | Google provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Index Exchange | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Sovrn | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Ads | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Unified Ad Marketplace | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
AppNexus | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Openx | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Rubicon Project | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
TripleLift | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Say Media | We partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy) |
Remarketing Pixels | We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites. |
Conversion Tracking Pixels | We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service. |
Statistics | |
---|---|
Author Google Analytics | This is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy) |
Comscore | ComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Tracking Pixel | Some articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy) |
Clicksco | This is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy) |