Dating Through Hub Pages.

1. 60

   dejajolieposted 13 years ago

   Just wondering, could HP be another 'meeting' site or is this site strictly for the intellects to unwind and debate? I know there are designated dating websites out there, been there, done that, and wrote about it, but how many people hook-up through HP like through facebook or myspace, etc?
   
   
   Not looking for stats, for those who have been here for some time,is it common?

   replyreport
   1. 68

      drej2522posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I have a crush on you deja...wanna be a hubstat? (wink) (wink)

      replyreport
      1. 60

         dejajolieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         lol I'm blushing...

         replyreport
   2. 83

      Stevennix2001posted 13 years agoin reply to this

        well even though i'm fairly new to this site, I would advise against dating anyone you meet online.  Since, it's very easy for people to flat out lie to you or lose touch over time.  Believe me i know.  I've had several online relationships, that didn't pan out for various reasons.
      
      One girl I met in real life after online dating for about a year on yahoo but when we met, we had nothing in common at all.  in fact, it ended in disaster.
      
      then i dated a few girls on gaia and myspace for a time, but they went on to lose touch with me.  some dumped me after they met some guy in real life after dating me for a bout six months online.  then the others, they just flat out don't log on anymore.  i haven't heard from them again despite my e-mails to them. 
      
      however, i have met a couple people that have had an online relationship work where it turned out like a dream once they physically met. 
      
      but you have to understand thats like a million to one shot though. not all relationships you start online are going to end up like the film, "you got mail."  because thats not reality.  in reality, people will lie to you online or they will flat out forget about you as they get caught up in their real life concerns.  im not saying you won't meet anyone on here, but im just saying be careful.

      replyreport
      1. 0

         Maximus591posted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Most relationships fail. Just under half of all marriages fail. So, for relationships prior to marriage, the vast majority will fail. What's wrong is to assume that the failure is due to meeting on the internet. It's an easy get-out clause. The realationship did not fail because you met online, it failed because it was probably destined to fail.
         
         Bona fide dating websites, despite what they claim, still have a very poor success rate in bringing people together. In fact, they have a vested interest in not being helpful at all. The longer you can remain a member (repeatedly paying your subs) the more money they will make from you, as they sell a false illusion that you too might find love.
         
         Just get out and meet people. Join a club. Take up a sporting activity. Do voluntary work. All these methods are tried and tested for meeting that special someone. They may seem boring compared to the sexy allure of joining a dating website, but they work. They've worked for years and will continue to work long after most dating websites have closed their doors.

         replyreport
         1. 0

            Star Witnessposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Bah.  Maximus.  Some just have trouble with the ladies.  You simply have to know the right--write (lol) approach, no matter what medium it is.
            
              Sorry.  But I could give you some tips sometime if you want.  Ciao, now.

            replyreport
            1. 0

               Maximus591posted 13 years agoin reply to this

               Horse-poop.
               
               If you genuinely knew what you were talking about and were blessed with the knowledge that supported your bogus view, I would take you more seriously. But I can't.
               
               'Having trouble with the ladies' is a tedious, uneducated view that attempts to throw the responsibility back to the individual. Nothing wrong with that, a lot of ignorant people fall into this trap. But if the medium itself is at fault (in this case online dating) then it's the medium that needs to be exposed. Understanding why the medium is faulty, requires more work and more thought than simply blaming the individual for why he/she can't get the medium to work in the first place.

               replyreport
         2. 83

            Stevennix2001posted 13 years agoin reply to this

            well first of all maximus, i never said those relationships didn't work out because i met those girls online.  all i said was that every successful online relationship that happens, its like a one in a milliion shot.  then used my own life experiences and people i've met as examples.  therefore, i didn't say anything that contradicted you at all.

            replyreport
      2. 60

         dejajolieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I wasn't suggesting I would use this site as a pick-up just wondering if it has happened, since I have read the tone of some comments.... I have had three long-term relationships that STARTED online (dating sites). These were not long distance mind you, which I think you alluded to. I am still very good friends with two. I don't hve any preferences over meeting someone online versus the bar/club because I use caution with both.... I am extremely picky and always make sure certain steps are made before taking it to the next level, which maybe is a testament to my success. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

         replyreport
         1. 83

            Stevennix2001posted 13 years agoin reply to this

            hmmm..you make a good point then.  that might be my problem as i've gotten so used to being rejected by girls both on and off line.  i've grown accustomed to not being too picky about these things.  however, i might have to since it seems to work so well for you if thats the case.  lol.

            replyreport
   3. 0

      Beth04364posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Maybe you should start a forum for us singles out there.  Im in.. Im single and looking !

      replyreport
      1. 60

         dejajolieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         lol, hmmm I'm not really looking, was just posing the question but that's a thought

         replyreport
2. 73

   Maddie Ruudposted 13 years ago

   I've never encountered it.  If there are any romantic success through HubPages stories, the team would love to hear 'em.

   replyreport
   1. 64

      Lady_Eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Here's one for your records Maddie. True Love on HP.
      
      http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/24156

      replyreport
3. 0

   Janettaposted 13 years ago

   I have heard of a few. Some seem to be doing well...others didn't end so great. But, I'll leave it to those involved to tell their own stories

   replyreport
   1. 60

      dejajolieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Awww I am a sucker for happy endings.....and leaving things to chance, one never knows.

      replyreport
4. 60

   wsp2469posted 13 years ago

   Okay, the only success story is one that is only a couple weeks old AND is now set in California, the state where you can gt divorced for ANY reason!?
   I don't know . . .
   Then again, Mighty Mom is out here in California . . .
   What did she tell me one time . . .
   I think I quoted her somewhere . . .
   http://hubpages.com/hub/Breaking-Up-Is-Hard-To-Do-Maybe

   replyreport
5. 0

   poetlorraineposted 13 years ago

   there are lots of people on here who have an affinity with another person, have you not noticed.  how do you actually spell effinity or whatever it is.   why don't we have spell check on here, it is damn inconvenient not to.  Now for another martini

   replyreport
   1. 59

      I*n*v*i*c*t*u*sposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I think it is infinitly! Lovely word and had a lovely car made back in the day with the name...*more scrumps*

      replyreport
      1. 61

         Lisa HWposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I couldn't resist mentioning that "affinity" is the correct word.  "Infinitely" means something completely different.  As for dating situations from HubPages, I suppose it can/does happen anywhere there are people; but if I were looking for dates I wouldn't be comfortable meeting someone online.

         replyreport
      2. 61

         sannyasinmanposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         No, its spelt affinititty. . . or at least it should be

         replyreport
   2. 70

      darksideposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, but given the nature of the infatuation it is called narcissism.

      replyreport
      1. 0

         poetlorraineposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         i can't believe i wondered why you had always left me totally alone, like never answered anything on my threads, joined in my hubs like you did with Ryan etc...... kinda felt a bit left out by the "bOSSES" now this  comment, can you explain exactly what you mean here

         replyreport
         1. 70

            darksideposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            I haven't avoided you. Just so you know, I'm not here to use HubPages as a social networking site. I frequent the forum to learn, and to share. I rarely have questions to ask, because I often experiment, or I learn from others before I get stumped on the problem.
            
            I comment on very few hubs, though I of course read more than I comment on. But I write more than I read (I have more than one account here at HP, but this is the only one I use for forum interaction). And I do most of my reading on good old fashioned paper. Some fiction (in bed at night) and I've got a thing for encyclopedia's.
            
            Off the top of my head I felt compelled to comment on Misha's sushi thread, because it appealed to my stomach. I felt compelled to comment, and even participate on Ryan's, because it appealed to my sense of humour. If dig deep enough into my hubtivty I'd find other instances.
            
            My reply to your comment is me agreeing with you, and highlighting the absurdity (not you, you're not absurd) of the unbridled displays of affection that people have for themselves through their online alter-egos.
            
            Aside from that, finding love online is fine. It's just another place to connect and communicate with people. While it can be considered safer than a pub or a club some might get more than they bargained for to find that there's a man behind the woman (and vice versa).

            replyreport
            1. 62

               kmackey32posted 13 years agoin reply to this

               Hmm great comment.

               replyreport
            2. 89

               Marisa Wrightposted 13 years agoin reply to this

               What Darkside said is my attitude to HubPages, too.  Over the last few months, the forums seem to have morphed into a social networking site rather than a place for Hubbers to discuss Hubbing.
               
               I'm a big fan of online dating because for women my age, meeting new men in real life is almost impossible. However, a reputable paid dating site is the only avenue I would recommend.  As we see over and over again on HubPages, it's much too easy to create alter egos online.  At least with a paid dating site, someone has to give their credit card so there's a paper trail in the event something goes wrong - so in that respect, it's safer than meeting someone in a bar.

               replyreport
               1. 86

                  rebekahELLEposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                  I never have considered using HP as a place to find dates, but I imagine it could be done if it naturally falls into place.
                  
                  online dating can work, and yet is saturated with so many people, I stopped looking even though somehow I have this lifetime membership with chemistry, have no idea how I got it.
                  I've met some good people through online dating, but none I would consider for a ltr. I enjoy my lifestyle. I spend time with a few good friends with whom I can trust easily.

                  replyreport
                  1. 89

                     Marisa Wrightposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                     I see that comment a lot, and I don't understand it. 
                     
                     When you're house hunting, are you discouraged by the number of listings for totally unsuitable houses?  No, you sift through them to find the ones that look possible. 
                     
                     When you inspect the houses, do you give up after seeing the first ten or fifteen?
                     
                     Finding a soulmate is far more important than buying a house, yet people seem to think you should be able to find one with a fraction of the effort.
                     
                     Having said that, I do notice that different dating websites attract different types of clientele.  Some attract people who are looking for a lifetime partner, others are more casual. You can often tell by how serious the advertising is. I would never sign up for a site that advertised itself as having lots of "hot" chicks or guys, or was based on sexual preferences, because they attract too many people looking for one-night stands.

                     replyreport
                     1. 86

                        rebekahELLEposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                        Marissa, I think we go through phases. there is no need to go into details here, but sometimes we are in a lifestage where we are into dating and meeting new people and then there are times when we take a break, we ease away. I'm not sure I could compare it to househunting because I would absolutely need a house whereas looking online dating sites is not absolutely necessary in order to find dates or lifetime partners.
                        
                        my dating life now is with people I have met through friends or family. it's all fine.

                        replyreport
                     2. 0

                        Maximus591posted 13 years agoin reply to this

                        Oh dear,
                        
                        Another female whose understanding of online dating is woefully lacking.
                        
                        Chemistry,com is an offshoot of the big, bad mother of online dating websites : Match.com.
                        
                        Chemistry,com was created by Match as a direct competitor to eHarmony. In order to swell it's userbase, Chemistry.com would routinely pluck members (usually female) from Match.com and give them free membership whether they wanted it or not.

                        replyreport
            3. 0

               cosetteposted 13 years agoin reply to this

               I concur.

               replyreport
6. 65

   blondepoetposted 13 years ago

   Yes even I have had my share of secret crushes here.!! It does that to you unexpectedly.

   replyreport
   1. 0

      poetlorraineposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      even you wow...... everyone loves you

      replyreport
      1. 65

         blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         It is my mystical aura LMAO

         replyreport
         1. 64

            Mishaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            I will date you any time

            replyreport
            1. 65

               blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

               Oh bring it on I say Misha, will go slip into something for our date lool.

               replyreport
               1. 64

                  Mishaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                  With you - into anything you say.

                  replyreport
                  1. 65

                     blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                     Really?? When I do I get to test that theory Mish??

                     replyreport
   2. 60

      dejajolieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Does it?

      replyreport
7. 0

   poetlorraineposted 13 years ago

   thanks for your help it is the drink i can hardly see the screen

   replyreport
   1. 61

      olivertwistedposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      No, you had it right the first time; it's affinity

      replyreport
8. 60

   dejajolieposted 13 years ago

   It's intriguing and a nice way to get to know someone, at least you  know right away you have something in common....instant ice breaker!

   replyreport
   1. 62

      logic,commonsenseposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Sounds like you've had experience!

      replyreport
      1. 60

         dejajolieposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         No I haven't Well not here anyway...

         replyreport
9. 95

   habeeposted 13 years ago

   I think it's because many of us "pour our souls" into our writing. We get to know each other on a deeper basis than we would, say, by meeting in a bar. Just a theory...

   replyreport
10. 75

    marcofratelliposted 13 years ago

    I'm single

    replyreport
    1. 60

       stefferposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       hint hint

       replyreport
11. 73

    cindyvineposted 13 years ago

    Oh no, you not going to bring out your dating boots again, Blonde!

    replyreport
    1. 65

       blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Haha Cindy which ones are they?

       replyreport
12. 73

    cindyvineposted 13 years ago

    Those thigh high ones with stilettos you were modeling in your boots hub

    replyreport
    1. 65

       blondepoetposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Oh dang Cindy of course thoseeeeeeee ones....I am with it now.

       replyreport
13. 60

    wsp2469posted 13 years ago

    Boots with stilletto heels?  Mmmmmmmmmmmmm . . . but you have to go all the way to Australia to see them . . . damn . . .

    replyreport
14. 61

    zadrobiposted 13 years ago

    I've always wanted to find a free dating site and just make up some bogus character... like Steve from Montana... a ranch hand and professional bullrider. Don't try to get ahold of me in Novemba' cause it's huntin' season!
    
    Anybody else?

    replyreport
15. 60

    wsp2469posted 13 years ago

    How would it even work anyway?  Many people won't show their real faces let alone say where they actually live. 
    As for making up a character, be careful.
    I got kicked off one site for using the screenname WillSniffurundies.
    When they kicked me out I expressed my disappointment and told them I would never ever get a paid membership.  I signed the letter: William S. Niffurundies
    I don't know, dating is tricky enough online without trying to hook up someplace not meant for it.

    replyreport
16. 83

    elayne001posted 13 years ago

    how about trying eharmony - the likelihood of them being "real" is a bit higher than writers with a great imagination. I know three couples that met online and are now married and happily - amazing!
    If you just want a little romantic fling, this is as good as any other place

    replyreport