Do you think total fidelity is too much to ask for in a life-long relationship?

1. 82

   Ella Quirkposted 13 years ago

   Do you think total fidelity is too much to ask for in a life-long relationship?

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2. 83

   LauraGTposted 13 years ago

   Nope. In fact, I think it is one of the two most important elements of a successful life-long relationship.  Honesty/trust being the other one.  I think they kind of go hand and hand.  I think "total" is already pretty much included in "fidelity."  I'm not sure you can be "sort of" faithful.

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3. 56

   jeanniedoeposted 13 years ago

   Yes. No human is perfect and I think there is no total fidelity exist. I believe that a certain person can be a loyal lover but not far to happen to be a faithful one.

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4. 61

   Lisas-thoughts101posted 13 years ago

   I would like to think so but I don't think it is easy. Even though some people don't want to accept it, a relationship is not only wonderful it is also hard work. We aren't going to be faithful for many years to each other if we don't keep our relationships alive and vibrant.  Sometimes even some years we don't feel vibrant in our relationships but the years we can keep things fresh and exciting are insurance for the years we don't hopefully. But all that said, it just has to be a decision between two people because romantic stars in our eyes love just doesn't exist day in day out through kids and diapers and dishes. We have to want to be with that person and make the decision that we aren't going to do anything that will irreparably harm that relationship.

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5. 74

   Levertis Steeleposted 13 years ago

   I have read many hubs about infidelity, and I have seen many statistics about the same. I am led to believe that more couples are unfaithful than the stats reveal. I do not believe that all people participating in a study or survey tell the truth. People are generally private about such subjects. I firmly believe that at least 85% of marriages experience unfaithfulness one or more times, mostly more than once.
   
   I think that such people could, at least, not marry people who want faithful mates. What's the point? Apparently, they are attracted to divorce. It is pointless and selfish to do so. If it does not stop, unfaithful wives will continue to award their husbands with other men's babies, and unfaithful husbands will continue to pay other women child support, and both will continue to pick up incurable diseases. Last, they will hurt their children. They often are blind to the pain they cause the little ones who suffer more and longer, especially if they lose a parent to divorce.
   
   Truthfully, I would not have married if fornication had not been a sin. Marriage in these times has lost much of its flavor. That is a sad truth.

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6. 60

   roelfinaposted 13 years ago

   We cannot judge anyone what brings us to be unfaithful.   Some of us grow with the years and some do not.  We outgrow our partners and they outgrow us.  A marriage where there are no feelings and emotions, we do not bargain for when we get married - we are young and know little about love. 
   
   Lack of spiritual connection with a partner that was of no interest to us when we are young becomes the most important need when one grows older and wiser.  Sex needs to be expressed through love to give us energy to live a creative life.  Just having fun is not what life is all about.   We cannot judge when one partner seeks spirtual happiness while the other partner is more concerned with the material part of life. 
   
   We cannot tell and promise Fidelity - we have to live a life according to our spiritual and physical needs and if one partner starves us too long - by staying faithful to our promise  "Forever on" we die and become a living ghost of ourselves. 
   
   Do what is right and do not lie - but have the courage to part when it means losing any sense of why we are alive when we stick to our promise from many years ago which has become irrelevant in our present life

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7. 72

   dashingscorpioposted 13 years ago

   Monogamy is a life-style choice. I believe you are better off finding (someone who has already chosen to be monogamus in relationships) as opposed to "asking them" to be. However it's important to keep in mind, when we change our circumstances change. In other words if one person (stops) doing the things that made the other person happy or feel loved, desired, and apprecitated it creates an atmosphere that is ripe for an affair.
   Unfortunately many of us bend over backwards to impress those we are attracted to in the begining. We treat (the new) better than (the tried & true). In fact most people feel once there is an emotional investment they can "relax" or cut back on doing all the things that won their mate's heart. It is no wonder you hear people say, "He/She is not the same person I fell in love with." We may not have any control over whether or not our significant other cheats but we do have control over how we treat them.
   Naturally there are some people who simply believe variety is the spice of life and they are never going to choose monogamy as life-style choice. Ideally you want to determine if you share the same values before opening up your heart. It takes more time to get to know someone than most people are willing to invest these days. http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … forgranted

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