Is it okay for your ex to party with your current beau?

1. 61

   landscapeartistposted 12 years ago

   Is it okay for your ex to party with your current beau?
   
   My husband & I split up very painfully.  He screwed me up royally for the house and any rental income that I should be getting from the current tenant who just happens to be his girlfriend.  My son is so confused and messed up over the split. Now, my ex  has taken the step to calling my boyfriend up to party with him and his girlfriend in my house.  No one sees a problem with it but me.

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2. 59

   krsharp05posted 12 years ago

   Your boyfriend should have either handed the phone to you when he heard the voice of your ex or hung up.  Why would your ex call him? 
   
   If your boyfriend doesn't understand the discomfort that you are experiencing due to the actions and behaviors of your ex, perhaps you should take some time for yourself to get your head back together, calm your soul and help your son understand that everything is going to be okay without your boyfriend in the scene.
   
   Let them party and do their thing and you do your thing.  Sister, everything is going to be okay. in time, this will pass. Be strong for your son because you can.

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3. 75

   bernard.sinaiposted 12 years ago

   I think your ex is trying to hurt you. He may actually succeed in turning your boyfriend against you.
   
   I think you should talk to your boyfriend about this.

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   1. 61

      landscapeartistposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I have tried to talk to him.  He doesn't see the worry.  He thinks I should just let my ex have our house, sign it over to him and walk away.   its my home will always be.  i promised his mom before she died that i would not give it up .

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4. 72

   jennshealthstoreposted 12 years ago

   Maybe if the situation was different it would not be so bad. But since you and your ex do not get along, and their is nothing "fun" about it, it seems weird to me. I actually get along with my ex's girlfriend, and I could actually sit down and hang out with her, but the situation was totally different.
   
   I agree with the others. If you current boyfriend loves you, he should have your back and be a little angry that your ex is trying to hurt you. He should not be joining him in party time. I have an ex boyfriend that to this day will still get mad at others when they hurt me, and we are not even together!

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5. 70

   greenerydayposted 12 years ago

   The most important thing is to care about your boyfriend's feeling, he is probably not showing it, but who knows what happen deep down in his heart, because he is your future now, and your ex is something in the past... in addition I could never see any benefits you can get from having both in the same room...

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6. 0

   msorenssonposted 12 years ago

   It is your house. You have every right to decide whom to  invite and whom not to.

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7. 66

   Rosana Modugnoposted 12 years ago

   I don't know the details of your split.  I would have to know if you were legally married, for how long, if your son is also his son, for starters.  I'm having difficulty understanding why you don't own part of that house, unless he bought it before you got together?
   
   If I ignore all those questions in my head and see it from a topical view, then I would want to know why your boyfriend is not empathetic to your feelings here, when obviously this hurts you.  You two should be a team united, and it doesn't seem that way if he is hanging out with your ex and his new girlfriend. 
   
   And another thing;  how did your boyfriend get involved with your ex in the first place?  Were they friends beforehand or did he know his girlfriend?  I don't see how they would have any contact unless someone exchanged numbers and how did that happen?
   
   Sorry for all the questions but I must see a clear picture in order to give a correct and fair answer. 
   
   But in a simple answer to your question, no, there's no point in your current boyfriend having any contact with your ex unless they were buddies before hand or work together, but.....even if they were/are, you have a right in saying if you like that or not.  If you don't, your current man should be on your side here, not his. 
   
   I feel sorry for your son because he is in the middle of all the drama.  Good luck.

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   1. 61

      landscapeartistposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      We own the house free and clear after we got married. were together 2 decades before we split. my son is his son.  My ex and my bf grew up close but drifted apart. courts did not give him the house, we havent gone through that milestone yet.

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   2. 66

      Rosana Modugnoposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for the answers.   Well, I think the courts will most likely rule in your favor but I think your current boyfriend should have nothing to do with your ex.  Ever see War of the Roses? Good luck, girl.  I'm rooting for you.

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8. 84

   prettynutjob30posted 12 years ago

   Your ex sounds like a jerk and I don't blame you for getting upset.Your boyfriend should respect you enough to understand how uncomfortable him hanging out with your ex makes you feel I hope your situation gets better.

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