Is marriage a mere social institute to argue or fight with the spouse even without reason?
Why people go for marriage if it has to end in divorce?
So many divorces around and its a pity really if there is children concerned. Cant two people just get separate if they feel time is over without fighting?
It is both a social, and a religious institute. Due to many religions, being "together" without a marriage license has created the social stigma.
It doesn't matter if you are married or not. If you are not "meant" to be together, it will not work out. If you really want to work things out, you will whether there is a marriage license binding you or not. The license is not what causes the arguments. It is due to the fact that those two people just don't belong together...period.
As stated in your other question, I have been married for 34 years. I think today a lot of people marry without realizing they are making a lifetime commitment and also taking a vow. Today, it seems acceptable to marry on a whim and then divorce in a couple of weeks, months or years. That is not commitment. Commitment is staying through the good, the bad, the ugly and the lovely. If you find that ONE who has made that same commitment, then you are set to go. Yes, it is no picnic the whole time no doubt, but just knowing someone is there for you until the end of time, is a great thing to understand. Society makes it easier today for people to get divorced, and it is acceptable . . . oh, I am just tired of this person, so I will get a new love. I do not believe they understand what taking a vow means and what commitment really is. I am not talking about those in an abusive relationship, etc.
A divorce is nothing more than an admission that a mistake was made. To "marry on a whim" often leads to selecting the (wrong) mate. No one should be stuck with a BAD decision. Most prisoners are eventually set free! Divorce is about second chances.
In all honesty I do not believe anyone on their wedding day is (planning) to get divorced. The number one cause for divorce is and always has been (selecting the wrong mate) for ourselves!
This happens for a variety of reasons. Among these are we don't know ourselves well enough to determine what we want and need in a partner for life. This is often the case when we get married too young. We simply don't have enough (life experience), completed our education or established a career path to support a marriage and family. Other times we get married to people before we (really know) them or we get married due to "circumstances" (accidental pregnancy, tired of being single, all of our friends are married, we had a pre-determined age goal, the future spouse had assets/income we placed a high value on, they treated us like a king/queen and didn't ask for much in return. (Which we thought was good since we were not "in love" with them.) we'd been in a relationship for years and just said, "What the hell, why not?"
As I stated earlier there are countless (WRONG) reasons why people get married or marry the wrong person. Not long ago I wrote a hub regarding 5 reasons men should NOT get married and they would also apply to women. No one I know of enjoys daily fights/arguments. Lastly people have been known to change overtime. What worked for us at age 25 may not at age 45. There is no neutral. We're either growing together or growing apart. http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … et-Married
There only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in marriage/relationships. We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have.
Marriage is just a convenient social institution that proved in the past to be the most suitable for raising your family, unfortunately many people today end up marrying for wrong reasons: financial benefits (government allowances for housing etc.), status (it still make some people to feel better about themselves and fit better in the very traditional society we still live in) or as the easy way to migrate (our world is full of misplaced people who are looking for the better life elsewhere)...
At the end of the day, it shouldn't matter what official or socially acceptible bonding you and your partner decided upon, the mere bonding will not hold you together, your love for each other and your commitment to make your relationship better with time WILL...I have been married for nearly 30 years and never wore a wedding ring, we went on with the traditional wedding ceremony just to please our parents and the traditional society we used to live in...marriage has never had any meaning for me, but love and commitment have...
Since divorces are the norm now at 51% chances of marriages ending in divorce I think the newer generation is rethinking marriage and a lot of them might forget about it all together. It's costly, ineffective, useless and an expensive ring or physical possessions shouldn't be required to show your love. Also, a lot of gold diggers looking to get married to get rich now a days it's pretty disappointing to see so many people put materialism over spiritualism and intelligence.
by Alem Belton 2 years ago
Why is the divorce rate so high in America? It usually seas saws every years but always remains at 50% or more. Is divorce the new fad, like having an adopted a foreign child or a owning a tiny dog? I didn't get the memo.
by dashingscorpio 4 years ago
Do you believe there can be commitment without marriage?So many articles, hubs, and books are written offering advice to women in particular on ways to get their men to "commit". In some instances these are people who have been in (long-term monogamus relationships) for 5 or more years....
by Elena 3 months ago
If a person has divorced 3 times, would you conclude that the person has an underlying problem?
by dashingscorpio 12 months ago
Is sexual incompatibility a valid reason for ending a marriage?Assuming everything else in the marriage is going fine and the kids are happy.I’m incline to believe most people would opt to cheat rather than go through the divorce process if there has been no change after communicating their needs...
by Akarime31 17 months ago
Do you think that marriage is really necessary?My parents got married because "it was the right thing to do" not because they were in love with each other. Now after a nasty deparation and 27 agonizing years, they are finally happy.
by Tina Boomerina 3 years ago
Why don't people in their 20s and 30s get married anymore?In the 70s, when I was in my twenties, men and women got married and, usually, wanted to have families. What has happened to change that?
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