If you caught a friend cheating or being cheated on, would you say something?
Say "something" to whom? If I'm really good friends with someone, I probably have at least some knowledge or at least a suspicion that he/she is cheating. Since this behavior would disappoint me and my friend would probably know this about me, It's fair to say we would avoid discussing it.
Friend or not.....it's not "my business."
Should I discover that a friend of mine is being cheated on, I'd take the same position. I am not the "Infidelity S.W.A.T. leader." This is an extremely personal issue that can become a volatile one. It is also one that I believe should be dealt with by the individuals involved.
Being an "informant" in such situations rarely ends up in a positive light for anyone.
My advice? Remain mute. You may wish to lend an ear or a shoulder.....but HOLD the tongue.
If I was friends with the person who is cheating, then I'd say something to that friend. Not about how I think they need to change their behavior, because that's not my place to say, but how I can't continue associating with them based on that behavior. If they'll betray the person they profess to love, then I cringe to think what they'd do to a mere friend like me. I don't feel that it's my place to say anything to the cheated person, regardless of how difficult it can be to stay silent.
Wow! A tough question. I would first ask what does "cheating" mean or define it first. I think I would first discover what that means for that friend well before I confess any knowledge of this or that.
You might be desperate to help a friend but at first say nothing. See if it comes out in the future and then perhaps you can speak. The problem is that is if the couple fall out after your revelation, it might be they get back together. You will then find yourself without a friend.
I probably would NOT. As adults we make our own decisions, although I don't agree with infidelity, I understand there are often many reasons for it. I'd be supportive if I could if/when that friend ever found out. But I would not be the bearer of that news. I don't think it would be my business or my place.
I tend to stay out of other folks business for the most part. If my (best friend) or a (close family member) was being cheated on I would let them know what I saw. However I would not walk up on anyone and make a scene.
Most likely no one is going to "thank you" for being the messenger. If I was not spotted by the cheater odds are I would let things unfold naturally. People claim they want to know and then they turn around and throw (you) under the bus as they attempt to work things out with their mate! The truth is seldom pretty or popular.
Being a courageous in this manner is being a good friend to him/her. We can do shameful things in bad way, we can also do shameful things to do good things. This is the time so ashamed of telling the truth just for the sake of love to your friend.
First I'd call them out on it - right then and there.
Then I would tell their (apparently not so) significant other.
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