What is the secret to a long, happy marriage?

1. 84

   Patsybellposted 10 years ago

   What is the secret to a long, happy marriage?
   
   In honor of Valentines day, share the secret of your success.
   
   

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2. 89

   Faith Reaperposted 10 years ago

   Hi Patsy,
   
   I have been married for 36 years, and I truly believe the secret to a long, happy marriage is communication, respect and a lot of compromise.  It is learning that everything is not all about us (selfishness) and we must never speak disparagingly of our spouse in private or in public.
   
   Great question.

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   1. 84

      Patsybellposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I know I will always get a thoughtful reply from you. Thank you.

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3. 72

   dashingscorpioposted 10 years ago

   The goal is to find someone who shares your same values, wants the same things for the marriage that you do, naturally agrees with you on how to obtain those things, and last but not least there is a mutual depth of love and desire for one another.
   People who naturally agree tend to be happier and stay together.
   Lots of people say; "Marriage is hard work." However I believe finding the "right mate" is the hard work!
   Once you accomplish that the so called (work) is more like  the viewpoint a gardener has. It's a "labor of love" to nurture and maintain (something you want) in your life.
   A marriage is in many ways like a garden. If you neglect it then it will die. Communication is your GPS to let you know if you're "growing together" or "growing apart". Never stop touching!
   It's easier to maintain a fire than it is to reignite a spark!

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   1. 72

      dashingscorpioposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Note: There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in a marriage: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accepting and loving someone for who (they) are is the key to happiness.

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      Patsybellposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Great Advice. Thank you.

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4. 76

   liesl5858posted 10 years ago

   I am married for 24 years now and I think the secret(not a secret anymore now) to a happy and long marriage is good communication, understanding each others likes and dislikes, understanding each others culture(am married to an English man), always give and take, and respect each other. Share the household responsibilities like I cook, my husband wash up the dishes, I clean the house, my husband decorates it. We have our bickering sometimes as well. No marriage is perfect but it can be good. Love and devotion has to be there as well for it to survive.

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      Patsybellposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I like your thinking. Very helpful. Thanks.

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5. 83

   peachpurpleposted 10 years ago

   trust, faith, love and helping each other helps to build strong relationship

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      Patsybellposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      This is great. Succinct and on point. I appreciate this.

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6. 69

   connorjposted 10 years ago

   
   
   The secret is simply being in love; now having stated that, it is not necessarily easy to do this, without compromise, great sacrifice, selflessness, realizing how beautiful your spouse is, realizing how blessed one is to have all this and if I may add family to reinforce this.
   I must add that there may perhaps be significant help in this endeavor by first receiving the Sarament of Marriage so the couple has a most significant reinforcer...

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   1. 84

      Patsybellposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I agree. In marriage, and in life, it is much easier going forward if you both stand together in faith. We said. Thanks.

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      connorjposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      You are most welcome and if I may add in after-life...

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   DDEposted 10 years ago

   I am married on Valentine's day and this year will be 22. Understanding, communication are so important. Trust is a another aspect. Overall love can take your further than expected.

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      Patsybellposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Ah, a romantic through and through!  DDE, so, true, love can take you further than expected, and in different ways than we thought. Here's to 22 more and 22 more and 22 more years together.

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