I just got married he promised we would have our own home, But ended up living with his parents because for some odd who knows what reason his dad cant find a job. Anyway we have problems almost everyday because he always wants to be with his parents always just pleasing them everything is always them it just brothers me so much like I cant be happy cuz he always has to do everything how his parents want it and then now every time I tell him anything that bothers me he ignores me or just tells me to let it go and gives me a kiss like his tire of it. what should I do?
It sounds like your problems are overwhelming and that you and your husband need some counseling. As a therapist--I would encourage strongly encourage this. If you do not have insurance that covers counseling go on line and type in counseling in you county and state. I just got started on this site 2 days ago, I will write an article on Healthy Relationship next and hope that will shed some light on your problem.
okay i was in the same boat, but pregnant, not married. I was treated like a child, and my boyfriend was as well. His parents would talk about us behind each other's backs, and family dinner was almost mandatory. And yes, my boyfriend also was tired of "being in the middle" as he like to call it. My complaints would be swept under the rug and i literally ended up hiding away in our room. There were more than a few fights, and im not a confrontational person. i ended up taking my clothes to the laundry mat just to get away and because i didnt like being told how to do our laundry. What i ate, wore, watched on tv, everything was scrutinized. When we had the opportunity, i pushed him to get an apartment instead of waiting for a house. They were so upset with our decision, his mother literally scowled for days, and came to each of us individually to tell us how the other one was making a huge mistake. Ive been there. Nothing will get easier as long as you are in that house. My boyfriend still changes his mind about certain decisions weve made after spending time at his parents, but then he comes home, and we regroup, and were ok. It is horrible when you are not treated like a tennant, but a child. I know that sounds bad, but Id rather be ignored than pressured. Hang in there. You need to go for a drive and force him to listen to you. I had to go as far as starting a fight with Spencer to get him to actually get revved up enough to tell me how he really felt. Turns out, it made him see that we needed to leave.
Just saw this thread and if you are still active here you might want to read this reply.
Girl you married the guy, yet you expect him to find you both a place to live? Where is your self-respect? This is the 21st century - if you're not happy where you are...you find a place you can both afford.
You are living in his parents house. Those being the operative words - their house! Their rules. And while your husband doesn't sound as if he has grown up yet, neither do you.
There is a lot of give expected from you, because you are taking - you and your husband. You have a place to live, no doubt meals on the table, you've chosen to use a laundrymat instead of the house laundry because not only do you not know how to launder things properly, you won't listen to advice (from your mum-in-law).
It sounds like you have objected to being forced to live there and it is showing in your attitude towards his parents.
Change your mindset. YOU are the guest, but a working guest because as a young married you have a lot to learn.
Take advantage of your situation and get your head out of the clouds.
Did you really think marriage was a bed of roses?
Did you really go through signing up to Hubpages just to post that?
did u really go trough reading my posting to post a dumb ass question? jerk
I think that he was pointing out how you went through the trouble to sign up just to make some huge ramble that was hard to read and understand.
wow you are seriously in need of help. the girl is screaming out for help, and the person who promised to love her forever dosnt care that her spitrit is dying. All you can say is something useless and indicative of your serious amount of spare time. Your either single, divorced, or with a very unhappy woman. i pitty you.
If your hubby is reasonable and will listen, see if he'll listen to how you feel, and don't let him "brush if off." You might tell him you need him to take you very seriously and see if you can reset together some boundaries so you can preserve your marriage.
If he insists on brushing off your feelings, then he is effectively choosing his family over you. It takes a lot of maturity to hear that and accept it.
And, although I completely understand where you're coming from, try not to make yourself the reason the family is divided. Try to be accepting of them, but that doesn't mean you need to be a push over. It just means that you love them and have healthy boundaries with them.
Don't know if this helps. Hoping all the best for you.
Welcome to hubpages. Write some hubs. Maybe about relationships or something.
free ur mind,give some time.maybe tins we work out.
on a second thougt if tins get worst,take a walk
why the fcuk would you marry someone who lives with his parents?? girl you've just signed your death warrant right there...
for some unknown reason his dad cant find a job? The unemployment rate is 9.7 - millions are unemployed, me being one. I wonder why I cant find a job?
seriously, how well did you know him and his parents before getting married?
They could start brewing up some Crystal Meth or some such. Tell hubby to cut the Umbilical Cord and grow a set. What? No Cheetos here? Harrumph!
Not to be over-bearing, but as soon as you were married and had to live with your in-lws...you have to see a life of major issues...
if a guy can not give up his parents, I had a roomate, one who was like this and he got the boot fast, he lived in a shared home but never paid part of his bills , because the excuse was his mother who received welfare illegally and unemployment and had 2 of her other kids living with her, needed 50 to 60 percent of the paycheck, the other went to weed and superman toys, and we are talking a 30 something year old...you need to have a serious talk with this new husband, if you do not...and even if you do and it does not help, I hate to say move on..or this will be your life , as you see it now, for the rest of your life...
I always hate to be the bearer of bad news when I see it coming from past experiences...
by Tina Boomerina 8 years ago
Why don't people in their 20s and 30s get married anymore?In the 70s, when I was in my twenties, men and women got married and, usually, wanted to have families. What has happened to change that?
by Jewels2940 9 years ago
I know that getting married young was probably the first sign that marriage was maybe a bad idea, but a marriage isn't going to work when only one person is putting forth an effort to make it work. I was 22 when I got married; I thought that I was happy until my husband quit his job. I understand...
by Brittany Napier 9 years ago
Do you believe there is an age that is too young to get married?
by tiredofhusband 12 years ago
Why do so many women think that their husbands do not view porn in some way? I have found from...being married and single for 10 years that what this writer has said is true. Pornography interferes with marriage what most people don't understand is that it is an addiction that eats into...
by Daniela17 7 years ago
I need help in living my lifeI am scared to grow up. Ashamed to say. But I fear the lack of growth. I dont have many friends I keep on my room too much. I have traveled all over the world. But the daily common life or night life is hard for me. I am scared of life.
by Lewis Wanjohi 11 years ago
When a 19 year old asks you whether or not to marry at that age, whats the right answer
Copyright © 2024 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. HubPages® is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.
Copyright © 2024 Maven Media Brands, LLC and respective owners.
As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.
For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy
Show DetailsNecessary | |
---|---|
HubPages Device ID | This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons. |
Login | This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service. |
Google Recaptcha | This is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy) |
Akismet | This is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Google Analytics | This is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy) |
HubPages Traffic Pixel | This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. |
Amazon Web Services | This is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy) |
Cloudflare | This is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Hosted Libraries | Javascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy) |
Features | |
---|---|
Google Custom Search | This is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Maps | Some articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Google Charts | This is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy) |
Google AdSense Host API | This service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Google YouTube | Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Vimeo | Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy) |
Paypal | This is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Login | You can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy) |
Maven | This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy) |
Marketing | |
---|---|
Google AdSense | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Google DoubleClick | Google provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Index Exchange | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Sovrn | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Facebook Ads | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Unified Ad Marketplace | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
AppNexus | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Openx | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Rubicon Project | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
TripleLift | This is an ad network. (Privacy Policy) |
Say Media | We partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy) |
Remarketing Pixels | We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites. |
Conversion Tracking Pixels | We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service. |
Statistics | |
---|---|
Author Google Analytics | This is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy) |
Comscore | ComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy) |
Amazon Tracking Pixel | Some articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy) |
Clicksco | This is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy) |