I have seen so many cases where women are being taken advantage of because of their faithfulness and sincerity to their men. I have seen how much women love their men and men turn around paying them in a bad coin by cheating,because from my research I see the level at which men cheats is far higher than women, I feel sad about these everytime I see these happening and I ask myself why does these keep happening mostly to women despite their commitment?why don't men love for real?
You know, it's funny that a Nigerian man asks this question, and I say this because I am nigerian myself. Well half, other half ghanian. I'll tell you having lived in both countries and now in the states that everybody cheats. Men, women, young old. Infidelity has no prejudice and stupidity has no limits.
Nothing is limited to gender, yes some how a tendancy towards submissive actions, others are more dominant as knolyyourself mentioned. The question to ask is what are you going to do about your life and your relationships?
Think it has something to do with the dominant submissive sexual thing and/or internal/external objectives.
Thank you for the reply, knolyourself, i appreciate your comment but why always women?and not men?
Women cannot separate sex from love. Men can. Therefore it is always wise to abstain from having sex so she can keep her wits about her until such time as a true relationship has developed.
There's an old saying, which I never liked but is true nonetheless: Once you have sex with her, you own her.
Well my man has always been faithful to me....... We were listening to Alice Cooper on a radio show last night he was talking about this very subject..... He said i have never cheated on my lady.... even though in this industry everyone things we all do, I don't he said emphatically,
And you pharuk temmy t....... i am sure you would not either...... so why give all men the bad name. Some women cheat a lot too believe me....
I cannot believe you do not know who Alice Cooper is..... He is a singer..... well he was..... LOOK HIM UP......
amongst the people i know more women are giving their men a hard time, and banning them from seeing the children etc...... Not sure really, but why worry as long as you and your partner are happy.
Maybe Mr. Cooper really does have sympathy for women's feelings.
I kinda got that idea when he sang "Only Women Bleed"....
Joy you are very interesting and thank you for the comment, well I'm speaking from the feasibilty studies,wow! What a coincidence, I don't have an idea of who Alice cooper is I just brought this on my own. You are very lucky to have found a man like your husband. As for me, I'm not married but I still find it hard to cheat not because of her but because my conscience won't allow me do that. So I don't cheat either Joy, yes some women cheat but the % of men is higher...you agree?
Sounds like you believe that most men only cheat with unmarried women that have no romantic relationship. On a percentage basis, there aren't too many of these that will agree to a one night stand or other short term relationship.
That means that men are cheating with women that are also cheating on their SO's. Which is what would be expected - men and women cheat in about the same numbers.
Catalyst, thank you for contributing and I appreciate your comments.
I have a very good friend, almost like a sister to me, who was in what everyone considered the "perfect" marriage for 25 years to the best man you could imagine. They have both been my friends for a very long time and for him, well I don't think he even noticed another woman existed. This might have been the very problem in their relationship, because I think she got bored or felt smothered by all his adoration and left him for another man who was a real devil and a real challenge. They have both remarried, she to her devil and he to a very good woman who absolutely adores him.
Now here is the current situation, my friend and her ex-husband have somehow come back together and are having an affair. I wasn't surprised when she finally broke down and told me because when you see them together, he still only has eyes for her and you can almost feel the tension in the air between them. He has never stopped being in love with her and she now realizes how much she still loves him.
The obvious solution would be to get divorced from their current spouses and remarry which is what they would like to do, but current circumstances make that option impossible at this time.
The best part of this whole affair is that because of all the years they were married, neither of them feels they are cheating or has any guilt about their relationship. She tells me it's the most natural and normal feeling in the world for them to be together and it's actually the current spouses that make them feel awkward. So, I think not only women love wholeheartedly, men do just as well, but sometimes it's not always their spouse they are wholeheartedly in love with.
Unless you have actually picked wild mushrooms and tasted the magnificence of that wildness, don't assume that it is wrong to pick mushrooms!
'Cheating' is the wrong word for experiencing the tastes of wild fruit!
In the same context.. your inexperience shows through, merely from making an assumption that the problem lies solely with men! From experience, I have found very often men are too self absorbed or blind to notice how extremely wild their wives and G/Fs can be!
Honestly, no. I am pretty sure my boyfriends were usually more into me that I was into them.
That is a question many women have asked for years. Is it entitlement? Do men feel entitled to test the waters. I don't know. I'm actually very lucky to have a husband who truly has eyes for me and me alone. Before him, I also suffered through philandering boyfriends who couldn't stay faithful.
BUT...
After looking back, I realize that I met my husband at a time when I was comfortable and confident with myself. When we started dating, I "laid down the law" so-to-speak. I'd never done this before with my previous boyfriends, I was too afraid that being assertive about my own desires would scare them away.
One broken heart changed that. I spent alot of time alone, getting to know myself, getting used to being alone with myself-learning how to just be alone and happy. Being alone and happy afforded me the confidence and ability to say, "This is who I am and this is what I want". The difference between my husband and my past boyfriends is that my husband knew going in exactly what I wanted and what I expected. He knew I wasn't afraid of being alone. Maybe this is the problem most women have when it comes to cheating boyfriends. Maybe.
we listen to his radio programme a lot, and he seems a lovely man. He was quite upset that people think everyone in the music industry would be unfaithful to their wives..... I am not, he stated, nor never will be.... he warms your heart, and plays good music too......
Michelle you sound like you have been through a lot??? But now, your sorrow that lasted for a night has brought you joy in the morning. I think I like the idea at which you brought yourself back from pains to happiness. You rolled the dice when you have got nothing to lose.I really appreciate your contribution.
are you going to write any hubs pharuk temmy1. I just wanted to read one, but so far none up.....
Psycheskinner, but why is it like ?I appreciate your comment though.
Why is what? People are different. Not all women are the same.
Thank you joy for asking why, reason is I care about others and how they feel.I appreciate your contribution though.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A19hAu_qPb8
here is Alice cooper, maybe they both sang it....
Brenda,do you think Mr. Cooper sang that song because he has sympathy for women or because of what he has experienced? I appreciate your contribution.
Pearldiver, thank you for contributing, you have said your own view...
I have absolutely no idea..... in fact though i listen to him on the radio talking, i hate his music, and his make up. I did not even know that he did sing that song, until another hubber mentioned it, Brenda Durham and i just realised that although i am called Brenda, and i presumed you were talking to me, i am joy 56 on here. Ha Ha too funny
haha hi the "other" Brenda. To you, I guess I'm the "other" Brenda!
I dunno who pharuk was asking, but as for me.....I haven't really checked into Alice Cooper's biography, but he is really interesting. I just remember hearing that song "Only Women Bleed" years ago when I was young, and it struck me as being very thoughtful and sincerely concerned about the plight of women who were trapped under the authority of thoughtless thankless men. Looking online, I see he refers to it as women being abused by their spouses or boyfriends, etc. I may have imagined his concern, I dunno, but his delivery of the song was really good.
I recently heard he became a Christian (I dunno much about how or why or when or what denomination, etc.). But I went and pulled up a video where he gave a 2009 interview where he said God took away his thirst for alcohol, a clean break. Awesome! He has the same testimony that I've heard before from someone in my life who, years and years ago, got delivered from alcohol, praise the Lord! Miracles like that, healing like that, does happen!
Disturbia, that is funny but interesting one,well it happens like that sometimes, someone's lose is another person's gain. Some people don't cherish what they have until they have lost it.thanks for contributing.
funnily enough i just went down the same road..... 2 Brenda'S looking at Alice Cooper together...... Yeah i just read a bit about him.... the girl on the vid, is his daughter, it seems..... Actually i quite liked listening to it.
I think his make up and screaming "Schools Out" was a major turn off for me, he is lovely to listen to on the radio. He does seem a lovely man. Maybe he observed his mum getting treated badly or something..... lovely to meet you ha ah again
Brendajoy,do you like that? Ha ha ha! I am surely going to write my hub and very soon, I am sure everyone is going to benefit from it, I'm just taking my time to know how things are being done here as you know I'm just 10days long on here,I'm sure you know what I mean, don't you? I'm just wondering if you would like to follow me so that you would know when I have my hub published?
I am not really sure i do know what you mean..... I will follow you as soon as you write a hub....
couturepopcafe, thank you for your contribution and I support abstinence and I disagree with the saying ones you have sex with her she belongs to you.
Okay brendajoy,ha ha!I want to call you that to avoid confusion on here lol!well I think I have brough 2 brendas together ??? Lol! I guess its a record isn't it?
Brenda Durham,I guess I have connected you both?lol! I so much appreciate your contribution and I was referring to your own Brenda at start...I appreciate your contribution as well.
You're welcome.
I too will be lookin' forward to your hub!
By the way, in reference to your original post, I think men have feelings just like women do, and women are subject to temptation just like men are, but men usually don't express those feelings of insecurity and jealousy in the same way and are often unwilling to talk about them for fear they'll be viewed as weak. Or maybe they just don't wanna face responsibility. But so are some women also that way.
Yes psycheskinner I agree with you and even men also are not the same
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