Having a husband or boyfriend who cheated is a big hit to your self esteem. You begin to doubt your marriage and your ability to make your husband happy or to be enough. And there are tons of old stereotypes which imply that if a man cheats, it’s because his wife doesn’t understand him, he’s not happy in his marriage, or his sex life at home is lacking??
I think it means he's probably pretty happy, but he isn't someone to share family responsibilities with, raise children with or balance a check book with. Maybe we put way too much emphasis on "being happy."
Most man forget doing is called 'our beginning' man were ecological and, if we accept the Bible's account, there was no marriage prior to man's eating 'the knowledge of good and evil', making us live like the other animals. That means what is called marriage is only a 'conditioned state' for social living with the intent of suppressing our instinctual urges which does not stay surpassed in boys and girls alike. Prior to this social living institution the purpose for sexual intercourse was engage in it only when the girl is ovulating; in social living it is seldom mentioned and when it is used it's TO PREVENT REPRODUCING called 'the rhythm method' of contraception. That's the birth to 'sex for lustful gratification' rather than reproduction.
What is lust?
The words 'human and woman' were developed because of a religious belief that one gender was "hewed from" or "woven from man", which is a metaphor revealing from both man genders either the 'yin' or 'yang' was removed and given to another. If we have ever attempted to connect magnets one to another it's done by joining opposing ends together which is what lust is, the internal nature being drawn to opposing internal natures of others man without respecting their genders.
From that understanding man we can recognize the person being cheated on has nothing to do with their spouse's infidelity, it is the nature of social man to lust, however, society only frowns on it when it is done openly by people united in marriage.
Affairdetector, I know men who truly love their wives and still cheat occasionally when they get the chance. It's called sport f@#$ing! Sorry, but that's what many of them call it. I learned that term from another hubber years ago, and it's aprapos. And it's not just the men who do it - married women do it, too.
I don't believe that someone cheats when they are completely happy in their relationship. I do not believe that cheating is alright to do, under any circumstances. Now, I have worn both the shoes of the "cheater" and the "cheated". Both are bad spots to be in. I cheated on my ex-boyfried. He had a violent temper. I can honestly say I cheated on him because I was extremely unhappy in my relationship and was scared of what would happen to me if I attempted to break up with him. However, with that said, cheating still wasn't the right way to handle it. At the time, I made excuses for myself to justify why my infidelity was "a different circumstance" and that it was "ok". But, looking back, I realize, it was no different, and not ok to do. It was very wrong for me cheat on him, when there were alternative ways for me to break it off, and still ensure my personal protection. Cheating is cheating, no matter how you want to break it down. People stray for reasons. Some examples could be: the love they shared just isn't the same, the sex isn't "new and exciting", there is no sex, the relationship is in a rut (this may be only the cheater's perception), or, maybe the person you're with is, really, just "cold-hearted" and doesn't care. Either way, there is a reason people cheat. Sometimes this matter can be resolved with simple communication, and sometimes, the relationship is just to broken to be fixed. In the end, the one who strays isn't entirely happy with the way the relationship is going.
Whether you are a cheating woman or man, cheating indicates that a need is not being fulfilled. Happiness comes from the self. No one can make someone happy, they have to do that themselves!
Marriages have their dips and highs, needs change and with that so can the marriage.
It is very easy to judge others when it comes to their actions. However, everyone has their reasons for behaving in the way that they do, whether it is deemed socially acceptable or not, they justify these actions within their individual psyche.
Men do extra marital affiar because they seek love in their married life and when they do not get that they try to find it outside in other women. and when tehy get taht love with someone else they have an affair.. it is as simple as that..
Happiness is a comparative term. A couple may feel happy in their relationship until the situation is compared with a better situation. It is natural for all human being that they are attracted to the thing or person or a relationship which is forbidden to them. But as we are all social animal we must follow the rules and regulation of the society to maintain the discipline.
I think some men no matter how good the woman is, they are lacking something within themselves. It starts with the person in the mirror and communication. If your not happy communicate it or work on it. So many people think the grass is greener on the other side. Guess what? The grass needs care so does any relationship.
I found out that people ignorantly die with their relationship problems because of Whom they can Trust , if you have problem of Getting your Ex lover back ***You want to be United forever with your Husband/ Wife.., Whatever is the Problem , i assure you that dr.mack201 will help you out
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