God is a Female...

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   skydiverposted 14 years ago

   I think God is a Female, and has spent the last 2009 years doing her hair. What do you think? ( ...and keep it light hearted please! )

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      JamaGeneeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Well, of course She is, and while she was doing her hair, she was keeping track of everything and everybody too.  It's called mega-multi-tasking.

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         Lady Guinevereposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         And for some reason only women can do this mega-multi-tasking!!  Go figure!  LOL LOL

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            sandra rinckposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Werd! She knows exactly when to stop shampooing, how long to let the conditioner sit, what temperature the water should be to achieve the perfect sheen. She is awesome.

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               Lady Guinevereposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               Does she have naturally curly hair or does she have to use a perm?  Hahahahaha.  I bet her hair is gorgeous!  Just like in those Pantene Hair Commercials!

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                  sandra rinckposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  Panteen!  Oh no, She totally uses all natural materials.  Panteen is too synthetic. It only covers up split ends or masks them to make them look good but really it does more damage then good. 
                  
                  I bet it is naturally curly, lol.  Then all she would have to do is take a quick jog through the cosmos to straiten it out and get a good workout.  She rocks!  LOL

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            GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Freaking awesomely funny. But I mega multitask all the time. Of course, I'm not the most normal creature to grace the earth.
            
            Or sane, but y'all have probably figured that.
            
            As for God truly being female...I doubt it has a gender. But thats just my view. Of course, I also doubt it has a conscious--besides all of us and everything else on this planet and others. ;P
            
            Sincerely,
            
            G|M

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      sandra rinckposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Finally!  This explains it all.  I was wondering were all the water went.

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         JamaGeneeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         

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      guidebabaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      If this is true, I would love to watch her in BIKINI on F-TV on the H@@T Midnight Show @@

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      shibashakeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      God is definitely NOT a female. If He were, everything would be running a lot more smoothly down here.

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         GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Wow, thats the most reasonable argument I've heard all day.

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      Kelsey Tallisposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      God is indeed a woman and I can prove it (although she's really not that concerned about her hair, tbh)... I actually wrote a hub about this topic just today (bizarrely enough). I will publish it tomorrow .
      
      [If my hub is actually about this thread topic, is it okay to post a link in here... I thought I read it was okay if it's OT but it's only my 2nd hub so I don't want to irritate people...]
      
      And LOL at Misha! I LOVE THAT MOVIE!
      
      When my youngest brother was about 8, he told us that he thought God was a woman because there were more commercials for girls' toys on TV than for boys' toys, lol!

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      shreekrishnaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      did you met him.

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      Jewelsposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Totally.  She's working out the mystery of hair.  She made it happen and, well to improve the next batch in the next manvantara, one has to acknowledge that perfection comes with practice. 
      
      The mystery of hair. Why is it that some days you wash it, same as yesterday, and yet today it does something different? 
      Whats with the good hair day and bad hair day?
      Why does it seem to have a mind of it's own?  It's supposed to be dead, yet where is it's mind that creates moods? 
      Why haven't hair commercials evolved?  Why does creativity end with hair commercials.  No-one has yet designed an entertaining and different hair commercial. 
      Why do hair commercials bring out mindless stereotypes?
      
      Mysterious ponderings by God!

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   Mishaposted 14 years ago

   For uninitiated here is the pic of her http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/12932?page=2#post147581

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      Lady Guinevereposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      LOL oh yeah I forgot about that!!! LOL

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   Leta Sposted 14 years ago

   God probably has ALL genders....and maybe is transgender, trigender, intersex, Torta (or what was that weird rock creature on Star Trek? I forgot..oh, and Tribble)...and maybe is a few other things we cannot even conceive of.
   
   (Hope Mark Knowles does not come after me!)

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      shibashakeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Maybe, Mark Knowles *is* God and He is just messing with us

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         GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Nah, 'cause God wrote him a long winded message through darkside.

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            shibashakeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            LOL - Thanks for pointing me to it. I can't believe I almost missed a message from God.
            
            HubPages should at least highlight it or something; and shouldn't it also appear on every Google search result?! God needs to acquire better seo skills (no disrespect).

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               GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               Hey man, dood made light. Give him some credit. ;P

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                  apekshaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  god is a natural power..

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                     earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                     I do not know if god is a female or not, but it might explain why the pope wears a dress!

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                        GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                        Don't forget the hat!
                        
                        Arithra Franklin is envious...

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   Kelsey Tallisposted 14 years ago

   So here's my proof that God is female :
   
   http://hubpages.com/hub/the-Flying-Spag … -is-Female

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   frogdroppingposted 14 years ago

   Um...I'm of the mind that if God is female then she got something badly wrong. Which makes me lean more towards God being of the male persuasion.
   
   No female would ever have purposely inflicted the curse on a woman. No way
   
   Plus most men I know are eternal DIY'ers. So God being male would explain one or two accidents of nature. Wasps for instance. What are they all about?

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   Inspirepubposted 14 years ago

   Arguments for God being a woman:
   
   1. Multiple orgasms are easier for women than men.
   2. Finding a partner with whom to have them is easier for women than men.
   3. Being aware of everything at once as more pleasurable than being focused on a single task at a time.
   
   Arguments against God being a woman:
   
   1. Personal plumbing arrangements are much more convenient for men than women.
   2. Childbirth.
   3. The non-tax-deductibility of childcare expenses.

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   fierycjposted 14 years ago

   Only on a hubpage religion forum will you find a group of mature, intelligent adults talking about God. I mean, Almighty God with long hair like a tv commercial girl.

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      GeneriqueMediaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Did you hear that? No, I'm sure you're right, I'm just nuts.

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