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Tarwheels Biking And Union Groovin' In August 2010 And Terrible Jokes!

Updated on September 5, 2010
Union Groovin' To Crawford Dairy
Union Groovin' To Crawford Dairy

Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day.

Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

What do men and beer bottles have in common?

They're both empty from the neck up.

I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!

What are three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?

Hold my purse.

A good scapegoat is nearly as good as a solution to the problem.

The things that come to those who wait may very well be

                                  the things left behind by those who got there first!

A man told his doctor he broke his arm in several places.

The doctor said, "Don't go there anymore!"

How to drive someone crazy:

                 send an email message saying, "Disregard last message."

George Washington's brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.

A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France,

                                                      resulting in linoleum blown apart.

Could crop circles be the work of a cereal killer?

Did you notice that the Roman numerals for 40 are XL?

We went to a general store but we couldn't buy anything specific!

The convict was about to go to the electric chair.

He called his lawyer for advice.

His lawyer said, "Don't sit down!"

Power corrupts!

But we need the electricity.

Nowadays every Tom, Dick, and Harry is named Michael!

Henry Ford, despite his great wealth, never owned a Cadillac.

We never grow up!

We only learn how to behave in public.

These days, an "all nighter" means I didn't have to get up to pee.

I must be getting old.

I can throw a party and the neighbors don't know.

Memory is what tells a man his anniversary was yesterday.

Half of all the people are below average.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name

                                                is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

How long a minute is depends on

                                      which side of the bathroom door you happen to be.

Wednesday's Union Grove Ride Grooves to Mebane
Wednesday's Union Grove Ride Grooves to Mebane

What do all men in singles bars have in common?

They're married.

He who hesitates could be miles from the next exit.

A church going Texan thinks that when he dies,

                                                             he'll be allowed to stay in Texas.

Can I play the AM radio in the evening?

There's a new restaurant on the moon!

Great food! No atmosphere!

Somebody found out that I was agnostic.

                                               They burned a question mark on my lawn!

Why do bag-pipers march when they play?

They're trying to get away from the noise!

My short term memory is not what it used to be.


My short term memory is not what it used to be.

Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge to market reproductive organs.

Never trust a dog with your food.

I knew Morse Code.

But my tap dancing drove me crazy!

If time heals all wounds,

                                    how come the belly button remains the same?

I don't care what is written about me as long as it isn't true!

Early to bed, early to rise,

                                        and your girl-friend goes out with other guys.

The same candy bar that rots your child's teeth,

                                        is a wonderful source of quick energy for adults.

Did you hear about the optician?

Two glasses and he made a spectacle of himself!

Long ago men beat the ground with sticks.

It was called witchcraft.

Today we call it golf.

For more cycling stuff click yourself down right here!

August 14, 2010-The Saturday Carrboro B Ride and Terrible Jokes

August 15, 2010 Sunday DG Bicycle Ride- North Carolina Tarwheels

Bike Fest 2010- A Tarwheel Bicycle Ride -15th Annual Rural Heritage Tour

Heaven Is Knockin' On All Four Doors! -Union Groovin' 8-4-10

July, A Month Of Wednesdays (And A Couple Saturdays)-Tarwheels

Stem-O-Rama Bicycle Ride- July 17, 2010 Stem, NC-Tarwheels

Ode To The Rattleheadedcoppermoccasin! -Tarwheels

June 26, 2010- Chatham County Habitat For Humanity 3 Ring Cycle Bicycle Ride

An Ode To Tarwheels! And The Union Groovers Meet the Mebanites! June 23, 2010

Squirrel Nut Zipping to Saxapahaw-Tarwheels Ride Again! June 16, 2010

June 12, 2010 Tarwheels & The Ken Har Memorial- Rawhide Bike Ride

June 9, 2010-Tarwheels-Union Groovin' And Listening To The Fiddleheads On Lemon Grass!

Micky's Dominatrix-And A Tarwheel Saturday Bike Ride May 5, 2010

She'll Follow Me Anywhere! A Poem And A Saxapahaw Bike Ride June 2, 2010

Cycling-May 26, 2010 Union Groovin'- Crawford Dairy Loop! With Cue Sheet

Assault On Mount Mitchell 2010-A Virtual Tour

Cycling-May 12, 2010 Union Groovin' and Mebane Espressin'

Cycling-May 9, 2010-Hillsborough To Yanceyville-79 Miles

Cycling-May 5, 2010-A Ode to-Union Groovin' To Saxapahaw!

Cycling-May 2, 2010-Raven Rock Ramble-107 miles

April 23, 24, 2010 Carrboro Tarwheels and The Bicycle Wheel Of Adam O'Neil

An Ode To Three Possums In The Middle Of The Road

April 20, 2010 Jose Is Back! Back In The Saddle! Back On The Bike! Back!

April 18, 2010 Hillsbros Playtex Cycling Team-Gets Juice-61 Hard Miles

April 17, 2010 Solo Ride, Tarwheels Ride, Solo, Time Trial, No TT, Solo

April 10, 2010-Two Rides-97 Miles But It Felt Like 98

April 7, 2010 Union Groovin' To Saxapahaw, Carolina Tar-wheels Meet Miami Biking

Gang and Buena Vista Social Club

March 31, April 1, 2, 3, 4, 2010 Bike Rides-Carolina Tarwheels

What Happened To Wednesday's Ride? 01-12-10

March 2010-Almost Spring Bike Rides-Plus On The Road Bike Repair Tips

Marquis de Sade-Bob Scofield's Ride 2010

Bike Fest 2010- A Tarwheel Bicycle Ride -15th Annual Rural Heritage Tour

The Playtex Cycling Team

I'm Dreaming Of A White Bike Ride

12-14-09 Solo-Stereo-Winter-Ride

12/03/09 Cycling Photos and A Lesson On Photo Repair

Mickey's Favorite Bicycle "Descending" Videos

Mountain Biking Unaka


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    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      Oh Hummingbird! It's so nice to see a Hummingbird today! Thank you Dear!

    • Hummingbird5356 profile image


      8 years ago

      Hello Micky, the old jokes are always funny. I liked the photos too. Another good and funny hub. Thanks.

    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      Yo 50 Bro! "I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!"

    • 50 Caliber profile image

      50 Caliber 

      8 years ago from Arizona

      Mic, more good funnies to escort your pics to the end, keep them coming! Dusty

    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      It's a pretty good sense of humor even if skewed a little. I love you Dim! God bless!

    • Dim Flaxenwick profile image

      Dim Flaxenwick 

      8 years ago from Great Britain

      Teachers also told Winston Churchill that he would never amount to anything.............In your case and mine, though I think we maybe do have a warped sense of humour, so did my Dad and it´s simply the best!!! x

    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      Yo Prasetio! I know you're young enough to be my son but I want to be just like you when I grow up! God bless Prasetio!

    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      Dim my Dear! It's just some brain-damage. My teachers told me my sense of humor was warped.

    • prasetio30 profile image


      8 years ago from malang-indonesia

      Hello, my brother. How are you today? I hope you always fine and healthy. Wow...after check this hub, I just wanna say: you have to grateful live in this place. Beautiful scenery along the road surrounding by the green grass and tree. That would be a wonderful trip for you and your friend in the pictures. Thank you very much. Vote up as usual.


    • Dim Flaxenwick profile image

      Dim Flaxenwick 

      8 years ago from Great Britain

      o Micky. you are so funny. you make my day. and the places you ride through always look so lovely.thanks for another great road trip xx

    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      Thank you poetvix! There are some jewels in there. God bless!

    • poetvix profile image


      8 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country.

      My sides are hurting you made me laugh so much. I like the one about getting old and the xerox one. Lol.

      The pictures show just how gorgeous the scenery is also.

      Thanks for the glimpse into your ride...looks like a lot of fun.

    • Micky Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      Hey SilverGenes! You are so neat! Look out for grenades in your kitchen!

    • profile image


      8 years ago

      I'm enjoying this far too much - " linoleum blown apart" was my favorite! Thanks for another fun ride! :)


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